Joe Rogan Experience #1061 — Tom Papa Transcript

Transcript

0:00 3, 2, 1... Not really. He got me the wrong pair and I said, take these back. Let me see them. So you think that if I put them on, I would all of a sudden love them and I would get it. of the Adidas silhouette. Is it the style makes the Yeezys? Yeah, and there's just no I've seen multiple things. Big. Polka, a lot of Polish polka. DVDs, CDs, VHS tapes.

3:38 Give me some volume on this guy. He looks like a guy that works in the deli Get the fuck out of here. Get an old tube sock from your dad oh, he's got it? Well, he's a bad motherfucker. Oh, my God. Where it's a part of it. No, we're going to do this. why who built this who thought this sound was so important? When? Before you pull up a picture of it,

6:32 Okay, pull it up. That looks pretty badass. Waterworld's a terrible movie, but they have a damn good theme show at Universal. But still, in 2018, they put on a jamming live show. skis I went to see with my family it's great we got fucking drenched by the way He didn't have to make that gigantic movie. wet it's like the whole thing was crazy, and it sucked.

8:38 Yeah, but he's in a fight for his life and shit, and he's got a fucking cigar in his mouth. and he's got a cigar in his mouth. Why are they filthy? Just jump in the water. costner i'm a huge huge Kevin Costner fan. Yeah, whatever, Giovanni Rabisi. In the future, there's no post office anymore, The fuck are you doing with these letters? See if that movie, The Postman, is based on a novel.

11:16 year it takes place in let me guess 2014 13's great. The other day we were looking at Blade Runner. Not so. It's just going to be slow and then all of a sudden. Completely, right? the batteries, the power wall, generators, And he just kind of comes in. and then you have a good point what you just said though about that it's politically motivated that the reason why

14:05 It's better for everybody. southern california is almost going to double so it's three years really yeah yeah wow because And they were about to be shipped to customers here in the U.S. who bought them, who want them in their house, you know, as backup Like nobody – this is a kick-ass company that went in and literally is saving this island. force of good and positive

16:09 cut the shit. Believe? but it was confusing when that was taking hold with people. just sitting in your place and wishing it so it's like saying i am going to be a bodybuilder Did they also take steroids? And luck. I saw it and I just put it on my vision board. The IAE. Yeah. like say if you're playing a game, like what if, You have to examine the mental game.

21:32 how to discipline yourself, how to write down goals, how to make incremental steps towards time I mean this is not a young woman who was selling this how old is Oprah now 75 89 no she So 12 years ago, so she was 50 years old. of 20 million copies. to come, something come and help me. there was a send her money for january there was some some whole article about it but it's

24:09 I would love for some really... what i mean like it would be so great if some like so you listen to some people like i watched Yeah, they're just trying to get you. I was fighting something all last week. But with guys like him – And I listen to people. They're just trying to say things they've heard before, or they're trying to somehow Chris D'Elia makes fun of those people in a hilarious way.

26:33 Sometimes people will say things that are real and that are really inspirational. done things in their life that they might not have done because of gary v because he's a hustler It's like the opposite of the secret. Play this. Give me some volume. It's really funny. I've known him for a long time. I said, but this is a different thing. The problem with some people is all day you're inspiring people.

29:11 What do you do? And you're like, I'll take advice from this guy. Why does that resonate so much? Yeah. If Chris just stopped being a comedian and started posting videos like that all the time, he'd get followers. Kevin, the same thing. They're not doing any interesting art. And then as you pay attention to them and to their social media, their social media page grows.

31:48 yeah well see and you know and it does help people like there are people that they do help And it's not worth listening to. do is I want to become a motivational speaker. boxing trainer's never really want to fight. professional. Oh, yeah? Yeah, he's got Parkinson's because of it. Oh, really? Yeah. guy what freddie roach yeah was he a good boxer yeah he was a famous professional oh yeah yeah

33:33 Freddie Roach and his brother Peppa Roach was also a known guy in the world of boxing. They definitely have some experience. Yeah. and, like one of the guys competition oh yeah but he's as a coach yeah unparalleled yeah he's why like universally My good buddy, Matt Biamonte. And she's like, I got it for her. She would just get angry. She'd be doing schoolwork and be like, this is bullshit.

35:43 Both. She's like this beautiful 12-year-old girl Did you deserve it? I'm like, there's no way this is actually happening. I don't believe this is happening. You know, that if she threw a punch at me, that I was just going to. Because if she really wanted to hurt me, she'd fucking hit me that it wasn't gonna land you know that if she threw a punch at me that i was just gonna because she really wanted to hurt me she fucking hit me when

37:25 baking bread, rolling up I never gave Jamie the bread. I'm like, he's probably gonna appreciate What's the best way, though? Because it just came out. Ooh. So it's not good right Yeah. Why is it better? Because it just came out. that you're supposed to get fresh sushi. What? But that guy, that's a great one, too. How do you say it though? I'm not gonna watch

39:08 This ain't like some complicated casserole restaurant that's about the size of this room. So well. My God. and trying to do it well It's a good thing. peering on whatever is exploration. that came out of podcasts for sure yeah yeah. Your mind's active. Yeah. So I think that that's- You have to experience things. Yeah, it's filling up the well. of multitasking that will no no different types of athletic activities that will enhance your sport

43:05 at least for me. Yeah, and reading, by the way. Well, Regan. Uh-huh. And then goes on stage and't write right. Right. He writes like kind of in his head. Uh-huh. and that's how they've created incredible works of art. Yeah. even written down yeah I just knew how to do them because I did them a bunch of times and and then it becomes this back and forth

45:47 You just find hordes of unfuckable white dudes out camping. I don't think I ever wrote it down anywhere. There's been a few. Yeah. There's been a few. They're usually, for some reason, they're one rare. But, man, it would be nice if they all came that way. Wouldn't it? It's just complete. funny thing and then you bring it up on stage and it becomes really funny but when it really just

47:14 It's like you do have to kind of remind yourself, Sometimes it can feel like, you know, because it comes out of writing. It's not painful, but it is a practice that is different than just being with your buddies talking about No. They sit down and do it. I'm a professional. ideas you want the easy you want to just sit on the couch like in my office i have a couch and i

50:49 And then some days the shop is buzzing with action That's not up to you if it's going to be great. like what you're saying you just have to do it you just have have to do it. He's right. I mean, there's days that I'll go and I'll write for fucking hours and literally get nothing out of it. And then one day, you'll just sit down, and then you have your next 10 minutes.

52:28 and creeks to start the fires on the other side so that it could force game animals to I didn't even know kite was a bird. What does it say? Like, well, I'll fly where the fire isn't. through when they put it together, had the face He got scared. It's got the face. Oh, no. They have good eggs, though. a team has been tampering with the molecular process that make up a beak in chickens.

55:36 Yeah, and they made a fucking dinosaur And then I'll get these dark yolks. The coop is essentially for the 19 chickens. Oh, no? If they found a mouse, they fight for it. So what do you do with all these eggs? I'm out of elk. Serve it up. Grass fed butter and ground elk as the base and put that on top of it. Yeah, I know a guy who does it. Oh, yeah?

58:29 Too much? Really? And I'm like, this is stupid. Yeah. Oh, just watching them suffer? Just being crazy. guy and uh she's like well i don't want to say anything i'm like what just look at his instagram fully actualized person. He does runs where he brings hundreds of people out running with him. He's legit. And I don't bring any water for him. Yeah. They're so good.

1:01:59 If they're active, they're hungry. That's cool. That's an issue. I've had three dogs that were bit by rattlesnakes. I brought him to the doctor, and I'm like, I think he got bit by a rattlesnake. And he goes, well, you know, if he's acting funny later, let me know. Beat the clock. Yeah'm like, I'm going to just get him there right away. Just throw him in the car. Beat the clock.

1:04:02 I had him there within 35, 40 minutes. So I take him home. They use anti-venom. Would they survive? I don't have a place to run my dog like that. Or angry moms. And they're not like the kind of dogs, it's not like you're taking a Presa Canario, 120-pound demon dog and letting that thing loose. They're tanks. Yeah. Get the fuck out of here, man. Look at the face on that thing.

1:06:27 Yeah. Oh, they are? What a nightmare if that was chasing after you. when you're gonna be attacked by a weapon? Oh, really? Nice. I just was opening boxes today. Oh, yeah. He carried one in the small of his back. that which I always like in the movies is when you're done with your day and Does anybody carry brass knuckles anymore? People hurt with words.

1:10:04 It's still hot. Addicted. Yeah. If you're drinking how many? That's a big time addiction. serum gastrin levels. He's a friend of mine. He's actually in town. the way it works is like it goes like zero the next number is one um and the next number is two and then two plus one which is three and then then it keeps going What's the label? Jeez. He told me he just got over the flu.

1:13:22 Oh, really? How long do you stay in there? Because I opened the door a bunch of times. it makes your body produce something called heat shock proteins, It is? What? She's the coolest. She's a frequent guest on the podcast and super genius. Are you guys not getting in the sauna? Just putting a tray under it to catch the drippings. That's good eating there.

1:16:37 It helps your body fight off inflammation. He was taking ibuprofen on a daily basis and got off of it after he listened to the Rhonda Patrick podcast. He's taking 800 milligrams of this shit every day. Literally, it was causing joint pain. And one of the ways they cause it is through the gut leakage. Inflammation is a defense mechanism in the body.

1:18:49 and it begins the healing process. When something causes a lot of diseases on people in people yeah and it also causes your body to um you're feeding A big thing with foods, a big thing with alcohol. puffed up with fluid. Yeah. Right Yeah the bread sour dough bread that uh have gluten issues that eat comes from this great um mill in uh utah that is pure organic small crops so you won't have a

1:22:40 but it makes a difference, and the flavor is so much better. Yeah Probably help And you're eating all this stuff, done and her diabetes leveled out and she said it was the doctor says because Dean Del Rey. He's like, sugar's the fucking devil, man. Yeah, he looks very healthy. That face looks inflamed. See, that's inspiration right there. Yeah. 10 hours a day and some people say you should do eight hours and every day 16

1:26:38 And the rest of the week, he can eat whatever he wants? the specifics were, but that's what he did. That whole, when people say I hate exercise, it's like people saying I hate brushing my teeth. That's back to the couch. I like it just to come into my head. Oh, John Fennett? Yeah, I think so. Dude, I saw Kevin Meany in 1988. on stage yet. Little ceiling.

1:29:43 and just watching him just destroy. This is Sinatra's all He was just so comfortable. I don't care. Shut up. He went from being a fucking murderer on top of the world, He started doing uncle buck. He started doing some movies and then you know You don't progress because you're not just in it doing that stand-up all the time. one of the producers of news radio said to me,

1:32:00 And I remember thinking, like, oh, my God, But that generation saw it as the stand-up was not something that you – but also, to be fair, they didn't have theater shows and other avenues kevin meanie if kevin meanie was peaking now he would be running off and starting to do theater I mean, you had guys that were big that were doing it, but it wasn't like, you know, you couldn't have a guy that instead of headlining at a club could just go off and do a little

1:34:07 Right at the end of it. But there was still plenty of work. Yeah, everyone was quitting. Well, there was also this weird attitude that some people would have that they were getting screwed because the work was going away. Real hacks. The art form is booming. Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom playing out in my kitchen? French comic ripping him off Jerry Seinfeld and then some French comic ripping him off and not

1:36:58 Right. there's there's a handful of comedians that were making a living touring for years, just stealing This is like a hashtag me too. Oh, man. And they're mad and they're coming out with all this. Brennan? And then I was- I don't know. I know what you're saying. There was a guy named Don Gavin who had a fucking hilarious bit about a lobster in a tank.

1:40:10 He comes up with that bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She fucking kept you around. but they should have been monsters yeah like don gavin should be in my opinion he should be right Yeah. to another tag and some of it really is as funny as sitcoms that are out today like the old, I was watching old Jack Benny on YouTube. I didn't know he had a show. Yeah. they called him the greatest he called himself the greatest cbs tv the best wow how weird yeah

1:43:53 They all smoked. Jack Benny Show, they would stop and just start talking about it. American scene. 62. But back it up a little bit so I can hear what she said about Marlboro. you get a lot to like Wow. paying your bills. Give me a 62. Big drinker. So, 62. Oh, man, yeah. That was the joke. This is so weird. It was wild. We might have a person. life-changing, life-altering

1:48:52 It became this weirdness. were seen as you know that is crazy right yeah you were seen the guy wasn't And that this is not necessarily all positive. Yeah. If you're 20 and that's the case, I love the picture of a 60 year old guy It's a new world. Well, he got rid of that gal and got a couple more since then. He's in great shape. this enormous um social media

1:53:23 he seems like he's doing, he's pretty happy. Oh, jeez. Click on the Captain America one. He's dancing like Captain America. That's so insane. something or another. And she's got this Netflix show that I watched with them. she's nailed that's great some of the shows like she had this one about being famous and about Oh, my God. She has these big cartoon lips.

1:56:15 It's pictures of spaghetti in her butt and stuff. eight years ago or something and uh she's so famous she at the point where she was just People were mad at the way we were discussing the Logan Paul thing. more apparently he was mocking the bodies like there's people's like their hands were bloated outrageous. It's like these people No, exactly. Killing it.

1:59:12 I saw that. on the tree for all of 15 seconds Here we go. The cat climbs up the tree, grabs him, and just takes off. That's a wrap, son. Just kills everything. Billions. Food's easy. Look at this question people also ask. My cat drops rodents in my children's hair while they sleep. Really? And my daughter, the next day, goes to put on her shower cap, and it's just filled with pee.

2:02:32 Leprosy is apparently 95% of us are immune to leprosy, but you can get leprosy from armadillo. Yeah, apparently though, those things taste pretty good. Because it walks on the road. You like deer? They taste different though. Oh, maybe I had some of that. Nothing was done right. I was born in Passaic. They're really, I mean, it's really, they're everywhere.

2:05:20 The next day the dog's going crazy again at the woodpile. They knock over a mailbox and they go right out into traffic and fur is flying all over new governor because christy why chris christy's such a slob like people hated him so much yeah Yeah, at Rutgers. He had the phone and everything. They're overabundant. without monitoring and having wildlife biologists, stoic, calm, objective people

2:08:36 the people live, it's by no means representative of what most of British Columbia looks like. because there's a lot of these people that made a living So what's their reason? I think they're wrong, but they're doing it for the right reasons. Oh, really? Really? Shit changed. Yeah. I've seen mountain lions twice in my life. I was in the car and I saw this thing that I thought was a coyote

2:12:13 it's a cat what do you got jamie oh jesus christ wildlife camera catches uncolored mountain lion Pauly Shore turns into that at night when no one's watching. right next to people's homes well i used to take my dog to a dog park up there I mean, that's the Hollywood Hills. That's like right next to people's homes. Jeez. Yeah. Oh, no, they're everywhere.

2:14:18 I saw them a couple days ago out in, like, Thousand Oaks area. They're everywhere. And it's because they don't have any predators like mountain lions or coyotes. very few coyotes so the natural order is why we don't see them well it's because And it was the same thing as, like, we were talking about cats with house cats. Just took a jack and all of them.

2:15:43 Jeez. Yeah. Right. Yeah. It's scary. Well, we'll work something out we'll whatever i wanted to do, what would I do? I didn't know. Well, it'll be a real gym next week because Rogue Athletics is outfitting it like a real gym. Fuck it in a house yes you could for sure yeah if you have the room for it and they have varying sizes of bothered tendinitis is a weird one man yeah and have you ever gotten it before no i have uh what

2:19:37 You know, like it would start to annoy me, and I would just keep going. No. And they also make them where you lie down in them. Your cursor's right, yeah, that. Hot. but if you got to 176 degrees in steam, Yeah, it's always, please. in 2003 but he died didn't he next guy died the guy he was competing against wow this I just looked that up. Right. A felt cap and slippers.

2:23:55 I cook an elk steak. why do you have to do that why are you putting things on your eyeballs? No one wants you to do that. No one had their face tattooed. Nobody. You got an umbrella like Mary Poppins on your cheek, you stupid fuck. Do they want to? Think about it. Nose piercing? I get it. And I said, did the nose one, did your nose piercing hurt? I'm looking at my daughter like, see?

2:27:22 I have three. I'll show you. Hold on, let me get a picture. Here we go. Justin on the back of his book I showed it to him that night when we did the show. That was great. He's just a nice guy. No. And this was like a shitty spot for it too. These are the days that must happen to you. to the silent Just go. Yeah. And I get nostalgic sometimes because I go back to that same place

2:31:39 Yeah, there's always something appealing about something He just makes his cabinets. Yeah. and just go talk to them. I make a little sourdough. you start to see the ones that you really like and who they follow. And you, I mean, how great is it that you feed the community and everyone really loves what you do It's always like, it's always the other thing.

2:33:58 Yeah, yeah. I can't get coffee there, because if I get coffee there, I will get one of those fucking things, and I'll feel like shit. living man it is the good stuff. very little sugar in the waffle, and it tastes good. You have to thaw them out and cook them pretty quickly. No way. You can eat that. There's no way. Wow. Yeah man Where people have figured out

2:36:48 Let's be honest. Yeah. just walking through eating them like chips. It's not even whipped cream I didn't even ask. Pumpkin pie is a... Coffee? Well, once your body, if you can figure out how to do it for 45 hours, 48 hours, your But I know when I'm in that state because my appetite kind of goes away. mirror. Snot coming down. They do this pose where they look at you like this.

2:39:22 People just looked at you. Yeah. Here we go. Stunning. Oh, yeah. Fingers should be properly visible when you place your hands on the waist. Doesn't make any sense. camera like hello I think I'm like this this is like fucking rules they were You fuck off, Jamie. I want to look sharp. Yeah. She's like the exorcist. Listen, honey. or something? Always put weight on the back leg while posing, and hence, oh, and hence, creating an angular pose, and hence.

2:44:13 Obama. You need more. Nikola Tesla got two? He had a love affair with a pigeon. Da Vinci did that? Yeah, 12 to six. One to four? Really? corroborated the rumors and went one step further. It's not unlike dexedrine. Mm-hmm. Constantly speaking. Yeah, absolutely. They were trying to make a drug that was actually a performance-enhancing drug, Oh, yeah?

2:49:37 Yeah. but she was chubby she just had a bad diet and you know just like the booze, and she's probably 20-something or something. So it works. Never. It's a dealer. Yeah. help adjusting your time, I didn't Yes, exactly. I'm just not into that drugged up feeling. Yeah, you're not going to be able to sleep normally. Ambien people do things in their sleep.

2:53:03 Like, you need to come to grips with your food problem it's a real story it's People have. There was, like, some crazy story where he was on Ambien And he drove to someone's house You can never predict exactly ocean? No! Beating someone to death with a nine iron. There's something called the homicidal Sleepwalking Defense Homicidal Somnambulism. I'm sleeping.

2:55:38 It's a real thing. After all this, he managed to drive himself to the police station. Go pretend. Yeah. She probably quietly is grateful Sleepwalking is a weird thing. I did have recurring nightmares that I remember. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Too high up this tree. What do you think it is? where they were just asleep, and then you got some kids...

2:59:49 Oh, But now I'm like, but it doesn't bother me. you hear a baby crying a plane there's not that thing when you had when you were younger. It's an instinct. Richard Branson out there having a party, it's kind of silly and it's fun. Which, by the way, apparently the latest in the sexual harassment Olympics, the latest entry is Stan Lee from Marvel Comics.

3:02:01 He says they're all just trying to get money from him which may Go back to that. He filed a police report after discovering that someone had stolen $300,000 from him. Whether this is any way related. Yeah. Me too. Tell these people where you gonna be performing Someone's hashtag ballin I'm all over the place. But just go to TomPapa.com. I always enjoy this very much.

3:05:09 They don't even read anymore.