Joe Rogan Experience #1290 — Bryan Callen Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Ryan Callen. I've been listening to Radiolab on the way over here, and they have a new episode out hot and the rock got that is a moron's version of the science that they clearly lay out and by the Some people don't believe in dinosaurs. attractive it's very attractive to like find out about some hidden stuff yeah like oh my god i The iPhone's the big one.

2:54 thousands but that really means only five or six but i think the problem with all of them is that a real creature called gigantopithecus it was a real animal it was like eight foot tall bipedal Yeah. damn yeah a german explorer captain robert vonering. The mountain gorilla was named the Gorilla Gorilla Beringi in honor of the captain. And he got them to pose standing up in a selfie.

5:43 other males and then move their women and children They have one that they call tree beaters. they don't know but they do know one was eating a fucking leopard so you gotta think yummy kitty It's probably 250, 300 pounds. They have two giant chimps. really big chimp that's amazing can you imagine seeing a six-foot chimp? Yeah. have any man, the biggest man, just to hold the chimp down for six seconds, or three seconds,

8:03 You're made out of jello. He's got to be part chimp. And one was a baby chimp in diapers. No neck. He's from the war in Rwanda. Really is. Heartbreaking. I forget what the number was. with the pygmies in the congo for a long time oh well that's what justin wren's doing yeah and said time in the Indonesian rainforest. The bug spray, you got to carry a, bug spray does not work. Did I ever tell you this? The bug spray,

11:32 you have to burn a sulfur coil. that you were doing this? It's probably terrible for you. Better than getting fed on. Yeah, i'm not using it every day i wouldn't recommend using it every day but if it's different yeah and lions and leopards or now yeah. Yeah. Even now, these poor villagers, And that's a wrap. when people shoot the elephants. elephants came back and stomped his fucking donkey into mush whoa just stomped the donkey was on a

14:14 But they were so nice. What is this, Jamie? He is. They're so dangerous Which is just so nuts. you can't, replenishing the animals Yeah. I know. Yes, that's exactly what they call it. We don't want the rhino to die. they would be doing that. there are record numbers there. can roam for thousands of miles but most of africa now is broken up into i think there's an area in

18:11 countries inside africa i never that was so shocking to me i know i couldn't believe that Why are you shooting them? Yeah, it's a real problem some rat poison. Oh, shit. body, which is how you clot blood. Yeah. oh you got it there what is which number does it say he is 47 p47 is that the one that they spotted because this lion has a collar on it. Look at that photo.

20:30 thing like a house cat. That's a lion, sir. shepherd 90 pounds yeah good luck yeah good luck and that's an ad add another 60 pounds 40 pounds This one weighed 150 He's only three years old Yeah All year round Are you It's my alpha energy They're drawn to me. Oh. I feed them. Are you... Have you always been like this? until I release them. My friend's girlfriend,

22:15 and I was meditating She's so, Let her have her thing. connection with animals like animals just recognize who i am they know my nature you would automatically make a judgment on someone who's hot? Right? Because if a great man has a son, that every time we wouldn't be shooting, Another iPhone next to the other side of your head No way you're a Navy SEAL?

25:04 He goes, wait a minute. I just figured out who the fuck you are. You're the guy from the hangaggi. He was at my gym. And then he kind of knew. He goes, wait a minute. That is cool. Is he done fighting? He's cerebral as hell. Oh, unbelievable. I was like, damn. Also, I think apparently Paulie got off a plane. Yeah. how this business works but he's they're promoting a they're promoting a he's a brooklyn kid he's a

27:14 fair play I understand it's a business. Fuck yeah, it's sneaky. that shit just went in one ear and out the other. And ironically, might have been good for Pauly in terms of it creating this fight with Art. 100%. Andre Ward, just like... And Kovalev said they didn't give him a chance, in Crawford time is on his side He's a warrior. He's one or two. You're talking about Spence or you're talking about Crawford?

30:25 He beats everybody, though. When I saw him fight Jorge, what was that? Big difference. Look, Crawford, the difference is He would, Rigondeaux. Rigando He's probably the best switch hitter How do you game plan for that? the end of the first round anderson would start switching stances on you and fucking doing some for a while i mean good luck it's a long road that's's like saying you're running a marathon.

33:16 Are your hands tired yet? and the endurance level he has up against Cage. Come on, buddy. It's mine. Give up. That's a different kind of human being. Just getting mauled. That guy looks fit. He's just not, though. But not, you know... He's pretty good there. I'm on TRT. Yeah, I was always like that. No, you were just jacked. and your fatigue yeah it's so but and it works the other way too because I remember

35:53 Jamie is a trainer I was like, I roll all the time. I'm in good shape right now sparring's that way when you we get guys who are triathletes or whatever they come in and uh wayne mcculloch shout out to the this guy here who's, they don't ask me. but anyway, in two minutes, why are you getting punched in the head what is going on with you i'm not getting punched hard

37:31 I was a little cloudy. He just goes, you're older. Yeah. He was, Well, He made it out at the right time. I go you're fine. I think everybody needs someone who they trust implicitly that can pull the cord on them Because of your whole identity. It was a great run. I don't know. they could fight for the belt. But you never lose that. you're fucking terrible you know you're hitting the bag your feet are off even if you hit it hard

40:55 And you start believing that. You know, because there's a few guys that will just fight anybody. I was like, but you guys go light. is gonna be fighting this is not it's like are we sparring are we fighting yeah and they they Like Nick is a world-class fighter. also just big long and athletic he's just like oh god he's doing very well in mma now is he really

43:13 belong on a fucking elephant elefante you know oh so going back to this asteroid impact is that the dinosaurs and basically most things died within the first couple hours. They just don't find any after. in our lifetime with something that ends civilization like that yeah 100 can happen and there was nothing yeah like the the entire civilization didn't they didn't they i think i

45:44 Yeah. They knew that. isn't that crazy that those tough one of the things about all of us as men or anybody is we hate to be vulnerable. this is what graham talked about in not just this book but in previous books that they think that something It really makes you wonder. Exactly. Yeah. Okay. Oh, my God. Holy shit, bro. And then there's pictures of this happening in the past, too.

48:54 but I remember looking it up. In the 1900s I know I don't know Had to have. For giving someone a lobotomy that involves severing the What did they do that for, Brian? Have you ever seen the movie Francis? they were crazy and they would try all these things catatonic schizophrenia she says she has yeah I'm reading this book tiny part of Africa, the people that run the farthest,

52:15 It's probably a bad idea to specialize from a very early age. innovative, so whether it's Duke Ellington or whatever, the great ones who make original music, Camp and everything else, we're just going to practice that. enjoy because sometimes you enjoy something and you go oh but i don't enjoy it as much as this but you're not going to be very innovative

54:29 Yeah. It's all stepmoms. They're in a position of authority. Yeah, grandmas I'd like to fuck. She's into old dudes. I don't, Yeah. Yeah, what are you going to do? Who was that? it has to be no light because it's a disaster why is he doing that but he goes he goes bye you know my sister had a friend like that. there's a, Is it the Carl Jung fucking line that says, that which we don't work out in our subconscious we will act out as fate in our lives

58:42 of fucking strings pulling on you it will direct your life and you will call it fate. you don't want it so what you'll do is you'll go it's okay meek will inherit the earth that's that they would be talking about technologists, Who are they? the large portion of the population that has say that's 500 in the bank well what's great about the to be wealthier that think about how all of us a lot of us as we're as we get older you think

1:01:39 I'm a peasant, I have no way to esteem out of my condition, but at least I have the afterlife. Right, right, right. But I what are how do scholars interpret that well religious right right right but i mean how do they how do they interpret that like what what is i think it's in the same vein as it's harder for a camel to pass through the an eye of a needle than

1:02:50 look, you know, you could follow the book of Leviticus Do what Rabbi Hillel said in the Old Testament. that irrational idea that we're all the same moral worth, because you can't prove it, mathematically or biologically. There's got to be bedrock that you can warrant. the people that are handicapped. And people have done this in history, which is what I worry about.

1:05:14 taking people off life support well i i i will say that i think religion and specifically the Because logic and reason has pitfalls. It's too fickle. so but we inherently know that our humanness our uh human essence. Yeah, you're not equal physically. What if he was like Eddie Murphy 2.0? That's when I'd give him my girl. Built like a god. because you have to go after him.

1:07:36 I'm probably not your type. that shut the fuck up Yeah. That would be so embarrassing. I don't know, man. Listen, stop. the building I mean but I think like three times Yeah. Oh, he's murdering. He's good? He's 6'10". comment. It's a weird muscle. That motherfucker works on his act. that um this kid was younger, Well, we talked about that, too. that's why I'm a huge believer in just take the steps

1:11:46 I don't know enough about it. Yeah. what level depressed are you? I heard, and I don't know if I'm right, Yes. And dancing salsa. There you go. And it's, as we are, we're ruthlessly competitive Americans. precedence where job security takes more of a precedence all these things well the minute i And one of the things that they've studied when they've studied happiness in people,

1:15:11 I don't really understand depression. that could fit into that slot Like Ari was on Propecion that uh ronda patrick was she posted something i think it was on her twitter account how inflammation i are after like when the reason i'm happy and the reason I feel so fulfilled is I'm able to express myself fully, I don't want to lie about anything. yes and the minute we start fucking bullshitting you're like oh what what what but that that's

1:17:46 and I'm nervous today Wayne wants me to fight because he's a fighter and he's a maniac. And then I put on headgear I feel like I'm expressing myself in that vein. Boxing doesn't injure you. Do you warm up with bands? I see those mitts start slow, all that cocaine. just to take the edge off. crap i mean there's a weird feeling after a mushroom trip, but there's no, like, devastating crash that I hear people report after cocaine.

1:20:22 what we were talking about my friend michael mcdonald's the sauna yesterday and i've been in the sauna lately you still laugh i was thinking like how i could i can withstand that for i withstand it for 20 minutes Get yourself a Colorado mountain home with a beard Boulder's paradise, though. that put caffeine and and comfortable footwear at the top of their essentials yeah comfortable

1:23:13 A hard wooden heel as well. Whatever. about yoga and satnam? through the zombie apocalypse. Yeah I was always like Yeah before and after the war. when the Allies bombed it. Was it called Where the Monsters Are? was dresden dresden looked like the surface of the moon jesus when they were really done with it was essentially a tactic. That's okay. anything that anyone's saying in any

1:27:16 live there you'd be in that style of living too and it's a hard place to live so you got to be a and I think the history of Russia, like great people. you didn't see any old men. traumatized certain strengths you know the ability to stand up against aggression and to be brave and Why are those guys in the door? They were openly criticizing and they get shot.

1:30:14 Google journalists critical of Putin murdered. that's a classic canada's fucking national anthem is the beaver well russia is a bear okay but so Yes. listen two of them were brought to trial look at me right now putin is gandhi putin is gandhi the conviction rate exceeds 90%. Oh, rates of conviction are very high. Go. No. That's too general, sir. our fashionistas, all the people that make our culture interesting.

1:33:09 but we provide, You gotta be innovative. of people because they're different in the name of purity or whatever didn't they make some like really weird public statement about homosexuality There you go. So with those kind of laws, those kind of laws that marginalize anybody that's not normal, quote unquote, What happens is you kill all your creativity.

1:35:32 Designed in 1957, I believe. And then he did it eight years before. Yeah. Let's say you're the king of the world. i think that a lot of times when you've been traumatized that you're dealing still with the if you're connected to the oligarchy but Do you think Putin's ever tried DMT? How many chicks do you think he's got in his stable? He doesn't have to do anything.

1:38:22 Ooh. Take your girl. It's the owner of the Patriots. Okay Puts it on With the ring You know, Harvey Keitel, really? As the story goes, Kraft handed the diamond studded ring to Putin Upon seeing the ring, President Putin, a great and knowledgeable sports fan, I love it. Wow. But maybe Putin mistook. and the White House voice repeated, think it was harvey kytel he kept that dude out into another room and had her out on the balcony

1:42:15 you know. Let's pretend she did. He was apparently locked out. It's more interesting to me that he's gotten himself in a position My friend friend always great I'm in Mountain View. And then on the 23rd, I'm in Denver, Colorado for two shows at the Belko Theater. I don't know No T-Fat K for tickets