Joe Rogan Experience #1364 — Brian Redban Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Hello, Brian. Nah. This fat one. Ari and I were thinking that when we started You would have to drink a case of it to even catch a bug. for that. I mean, look, i i reached out to some dude yesterday on instagram because he lost something like 200 do it kind of got to me to the point where now i'm like doing the opposite like i'm just like That's why school is ineffective.

3:04 But it's boring yeah every horrible it smells horrible have you had it jamie it's like bad right but god it smells smells horrible it smells horrible have and it wafts down the hallway, and people are like, what in the fuck? My friend did that fasting diet. he goes into the bathroom, passes and like falls down and hits his head. And I think it was my body trying to find sugar.

5:43 Since I've been off, I haven't slept walked once. It's sleep walked. Slept Because I was like going through the cupboards trying to find sugar oh well that makes sense yeah eating, I'm not, You got some cash. You were on a strategy before. Now I'm just, I got to quit this. are you doing just losing all your fat? It just doesn't't i don't even she would come in and everyone would be like fuck she was like 80 pounds

9:50 I mean, when's it coming out at home? You can get it legitimately, and you pay quite a bit of money. Four people? I was trying to look up to see how much it would cost to rent interstellar to have a screening at the chinese when I was a projectionist. with all the other films We rent a movie theater. Cineopolis? Yeah, we could. is Roadhouse he goes

11:51 That's surprisingly low budget. And do you think he's older or younger than Arnold Schwarzenegger? 73. What is that picture? Don't come get me That makes me nervous that he can walk upstairs. When you got back problems, man, your legs shrink. I sent Dean Del Rey to Lifespan Medicine to deal with his neck. because he's like i quit riding bikes you know for after that but

15:12 they think it's worth the risk. And everybody's riding those electric scooters all over the place. Is that really how you want to go out? right yeah dude those things are goddamn fast when we're in denver they're everywhere and months because he couldn't do anything when i was doing uh zookeeper with uh kevin james i did a lot That was just you grabbing the wrong brake, right?

17:17 her arm and then she couldn't get up she was screaming so we went over and pulled over And I'm like, listen, we got, we got to, we're going to get you a hospital. Neck injuries also. touch anybody like you can like you can just yank someone the wrong way after an injury and make I see so many injuries from fights, you know, from the UFC. you're going to be laughing at this.

19:22 Yeah, not dairy. fucking plowed over and you bend I'm going to play this video, but... 2,000 bikers. Here's the first one and then it just causes a major pileup. And then dudes are braking early to try to avoid it and they're just wiping out at the top oh my god this is what a stupid thing to do Well, the best thing, I really believe the best thing about Sober October is it inspires

21:42 Bert said that ever since taking that MDMA, he has zero desire to drink. have cared as much but yeah your body's like a fucking petri dish. I know. But it was a four-hour podcast. something. come on, guys THC oil, like it had like three things on it. Like why do you want to get that high? Oh, yeah. Let it drive for you. yeah no thanks i don't like that shit i don't like that why why why even bother doing that no

25:00 It's ridiculous. They don't know what your tolerance is. A lot. I think... they're drunk the problem when you're drinking is you don't know if you can drive or not you don't drunk and have sex and then some people say sex when I'm drunk. It makes the final decision for you. coming full circle again because there's that scene where he gets in and he makes the car he's

28:54 they've done studies away that's actually pretty close it gets frozen for 36 years and wakes up in 2032 oh wow isn't that funny what they used Do you remember that? Way off. flying you mean do you think they'll have that yeah because they would have to stay in a grid Go right. You open a door. Uber helicopter. the store. was the Hyatt you weren't here this yeah that's

32:39 that's like yeah i'm i'm gonna fucking do this for everybody. And everybody's like, hey, man, you're not even really working. But they're kind of comics because they've done it a few times right they're more but they never really started a business. like wow i don't know about this guy i hope he makes it and then look look sebastian had a hard You see him...

35:00 He's like, hey, these... know that's his joke like these phones you know whatever but you don't want to see him like host I did it my way. That was interesting. That was amazing. Like, who would kill that guy? Because he was high. And he was getting a lap dance, too. to his garage door. And Phil's going to give him, I forget what the money was. and phil's like i get it it's no big deal you know just it's weird when you see someone trying

39:55 No big deal. and do that, you know, stuff like that. like i don't think he was i don't think he got on saturday night it until he was older in life. I don't think he got on Saturday Night Live until he was in his late 30s. was amazing like he would have a binder and his scenes he would have different color tabs for each scene and he would go over his notes

41:53 Like, you've seen him in a million, like, off, what is the movie? Let me blow the piece down. Yeah. It's just weird. I learned a lot, yeah who cares and the last night of mimic or made fun of the nba's response or the president of the nba's response to uh china that and make it more I loved him. They're the best. Just adding that just. Like the guy, he's like super social justice warrior-y.

46:00 because that's how much money that NBA as a company is going to be losing from China. He signed to play over there this year, actually. And he had a very good run of 10, 12 games. phones you leave at work and you wake up in the morning and sit on your sink hey no fuck what's It's clumsy. realize how much better apple's keyboards are until you try and this is only on their phones

48:45 so you get the real keyboard, Because it definitely is going to become Yeah. Like a lot of the other things you hold down, it does what it used to do. Or just with the thing. Yeah, when you're typing or anything like that. There's like a lot of things that people don't know how to do. the Note's camera Yeah, me neither. Did you see the new Essential phone that got leaked yesterday?

51:31 Yeah. So is it their own thing? that would look huge too. I don't get that. That's so weird. An Apple TV With the flat sides. It just fits in your hand. Yeah, but if you just got a smaller iPhone, just get the small one. Yeah. Because it used to be a bigger deal. I thought there were more of them around. Imagine if she got arrested. pop my new favorite thing joe is apple watch now allows you to record voice memos on your watch.

54:48 So if I wanted to mix it, Do you have to sync them up? It measures all the disturbances, I mean, the application that comes with it, Oh, that's badass because that looks cool, too. Well, how is he number Look, so you can read your strain, your recovery. and i was gonna say on the new on the iphone something i didn't notice that you were getting down i downloaded a long time ago it is so bad back there when there's a lot of people back there

58:36 The concrete and everything. What are you worried about? that even if you're smart enough to not Yeah, you can't. that the California, That seems weird Everywhere you go. I think Apple's one of the ones. giving up information you know that's i mean it shows you where the slowdowns are and where the Every fucking time you go to any website now, those Google ads will be a watch.

1:02:25 but he was talking about how like when arpanet was starting up in the 60s there are a lot of the other day that i thought was a line in a movie i was like is that a line in a movie It's just we all wonder where it's going. It's great. And that this is, you know, like, yes, people do get addicted to be on the screens. how many times do we talk on the phone?

1:04:59 Can we talk on the phone? We talk But I think some folks today, because of this technology, they're socially a bit stunted. And email addresses, I think that's kind of on the way out. She was angry. Yeah. Santino was live on his Instagram, and I popped in, and he tried to make me join him. Don't be scared of your looks. I hardly ever text her. He'll send me these long,

1:07:36 that come in a text message. It's like the gadget message. No back and forth. Oh, yeah. Leave a message. Oh. well for me i'm glad i got the note because i wanted to know what the dark side was like i was But that's it. have an android you can go fuck yourself they don't care my honda has both which i thought was I guess. Yeah. And it'll just take you to Tom's Barbecue.

1:11:25 It's not – like sometimes you're looking at like a little screen on a phone and you're like, is this next or is it the next block? And then driving it. They're dumb. I've read that stuff too. the country with that thing they don't have the supercharger network that tesla has and that's You ever use the one at the airport? Oh, I don't know. in a satellite lot or take a

1:13:29 They get mad at you. At least they're trying. It's the worst at night. Like, it's beautiful. Whatever. Stay home when it snows This looks fucking dope black one that's already pretty blade runner but that i could tell it's fake because if he's going But no one has seen it. american tesla that's an american invention it's american like and it's good for the environment

1:16:14 Have you ever tried to fuck with the Tesla solar? It should be the law. And 10 years from now, they'll probably have something even more efficient. Brendan Chobb, he's resisting the Tesla. It doesn't matter. Elon should definitely have an update where it makes your car speakers match with your acceleration. I guess it's because of all the forced air.

1:18:43 They're about to release a fart horn also on the Tesla. Yeah, I heard about that. That's a. It's coming in through your speakers, which is really weird. They're about to release a fart horn also on the test list. He developed this machine called AWG. I have to outside of a cold glass of water on a hot humid day The warmer and more humid the air outside,

1:20:25 fuck here. Do they have any water in the but is it ever 0% humidity? they could get water out of the air. Dope. cuts to him like filling it up what is this gentleman's name moses west powerful moses west cargo holder? I don't know. got wiped out i mean they got crushed by that hurricane yeah the airport was disappeared just Because I was like, oh, what American, poor, cheap pizza.

1:23:22 see when when you're in the path of hurricanes on because of climate change, The pros are Side benefit of Tesla is that they could drive underwater. So they have the filtration system, at least in the X. airtight so that if there's bad gas outside. Or maybe it's filtering the air because the filters can, is actually cleaner than the air it sucks in in downtown LA.

1:26:11 it's stunning how weird it gets when you're seeing like fire everywhere and then the air is just That's a weird feature. that like why would they release a car that's not as fast i think they all can agree that elon's 10 And it's going to be an Apple car or something like that. They could. it's going to lose 80% of its market share. I think he wants to prove everybody wrong you know when everybody says that the company's going to go out of business it's going to lose 80 of its market share and i think he wants he's but i don't know how he does everything that's what doesn't make any sense to me like how does he do that and

1:29:21 people do that when they just take on too many different like i've i've thought about other stuff like doing other stuff i've had offers to do other stuff and i come with us tomorrow um wait a minute what's today wednesday i might be going tomorrow we'll talk afterwards okay but um i'm going soon you know but you should come it's fun Well, we're not shooting blanks.

1:30:47 It's like that techno hunt thing where you've got a laser beam that shoots out, That's badass. That's next. We're not in a movie, bro. That was the gun to buy. It's right down the street. It's easy. I don't really. and so when you watch them do it you're like oh wow jesus christ like there's levels to this and you saw patient zero, and then it spread to two people, four people, six people, ten people.

1:33:52 When I went through it, Good luck with, it is so much worse he was saying it was so much worse than he thought it was it's so it's so beyond Because there's certain streets in downtown LA where you see the street. this 10 years ago, it was still decades after they closed down the mental institutions, but another thing you're seeing around this area

1:36:01 which is just like a mobile camp. You know what's worse? What? if you watch on Live PD different cities they have a whole control center like all right we got a speeding going on here we sir I don't have to just for a seatbelt violation I don't have to listen And the cops are fucking up. did you see that? Oh, yeah, I saw that. You know, everybody needs to realize.

1:39:15 No. They get your ID. jail for a long time lauren hill too from the goddamn fujis they put her in a cage for like a How long did she go to jail for? all female facility. How come, Get in the cage. How long? Getting taxed a lot. So I'm a Florida resident and then I don't have to pay nearly as much money. different amount that you have to pay for this and that.

1:43:00 Well, he owes money based off the lawsuit for the civil suit, yeah. But if you're a double homicide guy Go from the beginning If and when the time that Drew Brees decides to move on. Yeah. Psychology. I mean... It's so strange, though. He has to do that to promote signings. Yeah, he might be honest. Before the murders You know like Bleacher Report Or TMZ article, I guess,

1:47:07 So how does he live? How would he do that? He's just bored and is like, doing seems to be like almost like a some of it's very theatrical you remember when we interviewed Remember? He's old school. McAfee Antivirus Up to right now Do you think you'd ever see yourself doing that? you do it in on lanai right you gotta you everybody flies in the four seasons stay in a nice place

1:50:13 We can just go to his island. I mean, out of all the things that i'm sure about What? His cellmate was a fucking gorilla. A former cop built like a brick shithouse. That's what he looked like before he went in. No. What did this ex-cop do? Like, what do we got? Ghislaine Maskell at the They thought she was in Boston or something. That's not been verified, right?

1:53:55 Jesus Christ. I don't know how this person was getting it there. They have footage on this island pre-raid so many stories about this, crazy different stories. an island costs? It seems like you want to do like what Roseanne did. Hell yeah. See, again, the Four Seasons. We have to have an escape oxygen basement we can go to just in case of a hurricane or

1:56:35 They would ruin it. Trust me. Get the fuck out of here with all of that. Fuck you. That's not much. I got too much just bouncing around inside my head into place. But when it's not and there's room like start with that you can clean your room and most people don't you keep your room a mess You're still smoking cigarettes? would you think if we decided to do that as a project hire you a trainer and hire you a

2:00:03 Well, you're just used to yourself looking big. Yeah, exactly. So everything's got to be thick. just that's an okay picture how good does he look at the 420 awards He has weed named after him. Me and you. When you move around? Like we'll announce it on the podcast. Well, I have to go to Australia. Well, I'm busy being sober this month, too. I'm missing something to look forward to,

2:03:13 I like that. The 9th? I'll tell you one thing, though, that Jeremiah's show's not as easy. That's the only show that I purposely do shots, drink, smoke a bunch of weed before I go on. shows remember i used to have people q and a's call out but they would call out things to talk and then so i point to tony while we're interviewing the guy and he goes like that i'm like you know

2:05:12 And so I just randomly like with my eye, And then there's a part of the joke where you, Dude, people were on the floor because it sounded like you were just in the back of the room like screaming. But like if you're heterosexual, nobody does that because it's the norm. You know, it's the norm. You don't feel like you have to blur it out to everyone but like if you're heterosexual

2:06:29 But it's like a thing they do to get attention. Like some girls like, God, these guys I date, they just never want to have sex. Tickets for Australia, are they still available? Woo! Are you doing stand-up too, or just doing Kill Tony? Okay, Red Band on Twitter,