Joe Rogan Experience #1421 — Jim Norton Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Three, two, one. Hi, buddy. I have to. And now I know that's better. I don't know why. That's what it does. I don't think, face-to-face. If you looked at his old That's the difference. Like, he's got a bunch You know, what's crazy is they have full setups now for podcasts, Yeah. Right now on this? There was companies that were taking clips as we were live and uploading them immediately

2:33 going to turn that channel into you know they could turn that channel into anything it's like There was copyright protected stuff. day there's more content being created than in all of human Like the amount of data that people produce today, it's something like that. the internet god damn it yeah who's it those are people out there with no internet you know

5:36 Yeah, but I never sat down and watched him do a set. His first text was to you? Some guys are phone guys. He goes, I want to hear your voice. That makes sense. My phone's always on silent. Hiding from that ring. When you're fucking panicking and going for your stuff, I kind of appreciate that. young comics, I think you featured, actually. But I'm pretty sure that was the year.

8:19 the alarm goes off you you eat breakfast you put your clothes on but then one day you know you're Look we're old But do you mind it always like okay that's one more person i lasted longer than and it's not that i'm happy to see I have everything I wanted. Do you remember who he is? So comparatively you feel like a loser, but you got to know where you're at to like getting fired for me

10:29 this whole culture thing, right? Oh, that's when you guys get fired because you had the people and they had sex in a... cathedral. on so many levels like so many things yeah you look back you're like why did we just shut the the people who like me are no longer going to like me and i'm going to lose this momentum i've picked Oh, yeah, for sure. You know, I thought of him recently.

13:10 Dude And Ari It was so ridiculous The whole floor You could never do that today never never in a million years we said, like, he was ready to go on K-Rock. That was on a terrestrial studio. Pat Fumunaki blows just like a fountain, like the most insane 2006. Like, I'm happy I was there for that. hanging out with funny people. And what do you want to talk?

15:49 and i go i don't do that i go i'm not gonna do that and like we need subjects like the guy was you would kind of work in your bits. Like, Howard's show was much more controlled. and fucking you know opie's behind the mixer just sort of watching all this chaos go on different I go, nobody knows what's in that pipe. He died not too long after that, I don't think, right?

17:44 I'm like, everybody smokes a little crack every now and then. I'm like, everybody smokes a little crack every now and then. In defense of him. I think he went to jail, Yeah. Like, yeah nakers yeah she was trying to she thought she was either saying. Oh, she said Nakers. Yeah. Nakers. Yeah, she was trying to, but I think she said the N word. That's what happens.

19:37 I definitely heard it in pool halls. say it don't say it don't say it just don't say that word and he said i'm sweating he goes sweat is I can't do this and he's like his heart is beaten out of his chest I don't want to give any more heat on that. No. just getting to know them. And just by doing that, just by getting to know these people, This is nonsense this guy's a black guy right in front of me right now and he's talking using words that i barely understand that's how the guy in the clan would say that's how the guy in the clan

23:17 His name was in the book. You're a racist. Wow. that he talked to you? That's what I would do when I drank. I remember I cleared the high school. I did that when and I would always call up and the nuns would be trying they actually had people leave the school and go outside while they searched the school. He thought she really had one? I bet I don't know. I remember reading it and I don't know if it was a threat or if he thought she really had one like i never got the full story he thought she really had one i bet i don't know i remember reading it and i don't

25:33 And, you know, I wonder about that. the normal way you are and you start changing it a little bit with a little bit of booze a little You change. Is that how you felt like when you were a kid? How did that get started? to blow him but I was scared dude he wore fucking He must have, in Edison, New Jersey. This is how young I was. at that moment. He pissed in my mouth twice in the pool.

28:35 So I was five. One kid opened the door. Six, seven, eight. He might have been six or seven. Did you figure out, like, what's the best way to suck a dick? with in this place i know it happened before then yeah wow that's crazy so do you think that this like it's kind of like watching like facts like when i was seven we drove across the country you know i remember those yeah i

30:55 And then all of a sudden it's like I open up a folder. and i'll just i'll drive through that neighborhood and i'll be like what the fuck happened here homosexuality is them, people being molested when they're younger. sexual with you when you're young and that person happens to be a man, you can imprint and you can develop sexual feelings in response to that.

32:59 But that, you know, this is another thing where people took out of context saying that, So it wasn't like, that's why I don't like being a victim. that bad. Maybe it was just me and my friends. And then it just kind of developed into something I mean, there had to be one guy somewhere in history that was like, I got an idea. Who's the first guy To butt fuck

35:01 At the same time they exchange sex it's like a social token like they they resolve issues with sex like they're It's not really supposed to go in there. Gets a little sloppy. Yeah. Yeah. And it turned out that his wife had been a man. Yeah, there's so much shame. You talk about everything that you like. don't think i'm a freak fucking everybody loves jim norton like it's okay i get emails from people

39:36 people do when they're worried about that is they scold other people first yep you know that's what Like when you see online bullying or people ganging up on people online, I guarantee you Be a part of it. Then they have to go see their counselor or their psychiatrist. look, they just discovered a new city under the ocean. you you almost want it you almost want people to go after them you almost want bad things to happen

42:00 Yeah. like you know i like i mean i i never want to shame other people for that shit like just if when you're 51 who is 19 or 20 Right. that's a damaged person. They're all fucked up themselves. And if you were around them personally, The separation that social media gives us along with the connection. of you know you like you're like you're not saying something that's going to hurt someone

45:03 people are angry yeah but then it gets to a point Because as a comedian, what the That's a terrible trap. they're going to think that I'm selling out some ways and I never want i think there's he didn't know who phone and he should have stuck with a fucking flip phone man yeah he had a lady that was uh No, I'm not saying that, asshole. it's funny, when I hosted Down and Dirty

49:16 So, you know somebody who has a reputation of just doing completely crazy shit Now, I guess he lives with his girl. Why are you buying a nice car? trapped in any sort of corporate structure or anything like he would fucking panic you know like and that's one of the you know it's it's one of the parts of his personality that where he kind and people wanted

50:56 it's going to go away. He likes a certain amount of anonymity. I just don't know how often i'm not a moron i'm friends with him i love the guy it's not because he's a bad guy he's a great Yeah. And then you kind of get married to doing that thing that works for you. how did i not see that i just thought he was conservative and then i think what it is is like

53:45 that's those are the people that actually like you they actually love you they actually will come started doing pretty good and started i would work professionally and i was getting some gigs and and then I was go, that's good material. Then once I got better at that and I became like a real, like a headliner and established, then I started turning ideas into comedy.

55:43 And that's what the pyramids are. and try to get those interesting ideas and put them into stand up for and things you want to say. Oh it's bad And now you're something different Voss and I think Oh, they're terrible. Christoph Silver. What's Christoph Silver? best comics in the world. He didn't really travel a lot. And literally being such a moron, I had such a piss-poor grasp of the English language, first of all.

59:14 I don't mind reading it, though, because my persona is what I hated more than my writing. But for a while, everybody has them. And I'm wearing these stupid things and I'm on stage and I'm bombing. But I'm standing there with Cavaricci's on shoes do you have a capizio shoes i do but do, but I can't picture them in my head. And they're sober too. Oh yeah yeah yeah

1:01:28 The curly tip ones But that's the core Being a fucking Didn't Henry VIII kill a bunch of his wives? Anne Boleyn. Yeah. I want to say that was one of his wives, but I could her name. I don't know who that is. Anne Boleyn. Three. She slipped. Jimmy, what the fuck? it was one day where I just had nothing. You know what I mean? but I feel real lucky that I was a part of that show.

1:04:19 and anthony where i would get so excited when i was good when i was there when i was in new york I'd take edibles. in the back bar just comics being comics Skin like a fucking rhino That Voss was a guy walk into the comedy cellar and they're laughing before you get there yeah it's gonna be a long But I believe he's had a hard time, man. He's always been a good guy.

1:06:39 Wow. They have stock? Well, that Penn Gaming company Oh, you definitely can. I got laid so infrequent in the old days. During the snowstorm What a good dad you have there's certain parts about driving in the snow that I do miss. the gigs. I mean, I still do them, but when you're driving and pick me up at her sports car. that's where shit gets weird.

1:09:39 It is really. You got to do 20. And he's fucking. He just lost control of this. to try to get laid. Terrible driving. Did you make it? I made it. Yeah. I made it. yeah, it's crazy what we do to get laid back in those days So it was like two years. And I think it has a lot of power over women's lives. or i would i wouldn't be able to come and i would just jerk off and i'd be like no i can't come

1:12:52 And so you would have like long conversations. Um, They would It's probably The ride back And, you know, sometimes they would ask you to do that. fucking with you yeah it's been fucking with me a little bit well you remember they tried to pin you know as like a 69 70 year old man or something like that they're coming back at him with something Here's the game. You try to get out of it.

1:15:29 And people withhold evidence. who's fucking amazing at helping people with this shit is kim kardashian yes she is kim kardashian But she's doing that with her spare time it's it's really incredible i've and i'm like that's not a way to promote But it just wasn't a good interview Slipped into obscurity on purpose she represented this vapid you know sort of trend i wanted to like her, too. I wanted to be, I did not want to

1:18:20 what's the matter, Jamie? I'm on Netflix I have this what was he in jail for? I didn't realize he didn't get convicted of killing those first two people. He didn't? No. That's what he was believed to, but I believe it was only one person. Like I heard he did all that, but the documentary didn't go into that. It scares the fuck out of me, man. It's like right where your cartilage meets your shin bone.

1:21:07 But what I was really worried about was my head. So many times. Aaron Hernandez suffered from the most severe CTE ever found in a person his age. Does everybody get it though? Like what Liam Neeson's wife died of daughter my 11 year old and we were getting on the uh the fucking ski lift and i spazzed and uh i i got a little too far ahead I got knocked out by a baseball when I was a kid.

1:23:32 And then there was another time where I was a fly ball and I just misjudged it and it split my head open. It was, I don't know if I- I don't know. should get the tongue down one man next time you're here i'll bring you to that that doctor's I wonder if my snoring would be less In a month i'm so angry at myself because i have to wear a suit and my pants don't fit like i really have

1:25:37 I won't buy clothes. I'd just rather be uncomfortable. Do you spiral? I try not to do that Please call me. A hundred percent. You give yourself a shot. Well, a guy like Bourdain, man, Where he wasn't doing well He was such a good guy You know, like, he had all kinds of different medications that they had tried on him and all sorts of different issues.

1:28:01 Oh, it was Daryl. He was so funny. Because you can't be that, again, maybe there's exceptions to the rule, but you cannot be a depressed person and dealing with that all the time and not have dry run it. But I guarantee you he had gone through that a bunch. I never really knew Jenny. to know in the eighties, that guy was the fucking man. That was it.

1:30:26 Didn't have any hobbies. Unhappy because they had been attacking him like online about something like bashing him not saying he wasn't funny or whatever It was just one of those things where a site trashes you he was really upset by it really They said that everyone was standing around afterwards. Here's my experience. Fucking shut down I think it was called

1:32:34 What year did you start with them? I, they didn't give me any instruction. the gig was supposed to be in buffalo new york but new york state banned it at the last minute It wasn't very big at all. I started training there in 96. That's me. In the dizzay man Seven years by that point I actually had to quit because it was costing me money when I can make two grand? Like, what am I doing? I'm making like two grand for a weekend right so I was like why am I doing that when I can make two

1:35:44 news radio at the time and the people that were, I was on news radio at the time, But yeah, and I was like an expert. And I switched from Taekwondo, and I started doing kickboxing and boxing I love it so much and I love just I'm a fan just, I love the fact that I just get to talk to the fighters and hang with Matt. Yes. Have you thought about training?

1:37:40 I have people, the UFC Unfiltered fans I need ASV, which is both types of apnea it covers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just make yourself do it. I can clearly remember being just tortured, raped by this dude. It's good for you. Give you an opportunity to try to get out of it if you could or tap and no one was gonna like just fucking yank Oh, it is. You should be naked and greasy

1:40:15 no one's gonna be shirtless. It's no big deal. Yeah, they're nice people, right? And you kind of notice that from a lot of fighters, right? around any of them. Yeah. Like never for that reason, at least, uh, no matter who they are and I wanted to know did he? but to feel those things it gives you such a respect for the fact that there's guys that are doing this for real.

1:42:02 He put me, he shin kicked me across the leg. Look at my hands up. Look at you. I almost threw up. Look at him. Look at you. Look at you. That probably wasn't even 30%. I had to wear leg brace. Oh, who's got you in a heel hook? It was Brock. Brock Lesnar, no! You let Brock Lesnar touch your knees? Yeah. There's a whole... Oh, what does Fedor got you in an arm lock? Oh, who's got you

1:43:10 Yeah. a test. It was a different outfit. Yeah. You could break your arm easy. I don't know why. All these people fuck you. Look at Rashad's getting you in a triangle. this guy is at this. And I just got a phone call one day. here's the money. yeah, and he just hired me. We meet in the city in a studio, and they he had this great dvd series called magical egypt um just he just passed

1:46:51 Well, the weird thing about the Snowden one, too, was it wasn't just that it was remote. But that he's got this situation where he's never going to really be able to come back to the United States unless they work out some sort of a deal. where is that kind of evidence? piss my pants guys that are like otherwise rock solid individuals who talk about their experiences but my problem

1:48:57 And this is something I've personally thought, I think independently, We came from chimps, and then, killer wrestler from russia remember Yeah. savages like this guy who's an elite wrestler, he's a killer grappler. If they've, you know, who knows? We're using phones. communicate through some other way maybe even electronically enhanced maybe you know something

1:52:46 Like, I don't know if they have no genitals. Pull up the guy. Shakes your hand, like grips it with his carbon fiber hand. Yes, that's the man. I want to believe, dude. beyond it and i want to i want to i would much rather believe in ufos than not believe in them to prove that Bob Lazar was legit. a camera along. They let me in. away with a lot back then in terms of erasing your history and um his his education is undeniable in terms of what

1:57:15 But I told him I wouldn't talk about it during the podcast because you're going to hear when I tell you, you're going to go, holy fuck. So I'm not looking at it. I mean, I'm not invested anymore. I had Commander Fravor, the guy who filmed that thing, the guy who was there and who Between one blip to another, Yes, they could see it with the naked eye.

1:59:04 You could see that they're trying to track it and stay with it but it's moving too fast see But whatever it is, it's something that moves at an insane speed that we're not capable of understanding a fucking rock solid guy he's very it's very compelling when you talk to him in person because real until 2013 he was describing it long before it was ever proven to be an

2:01:32 Not hard in the 1980s. Also, they have records of people that worked with him at Los Alamos Labs. Like, I want people to go out and go, yeah, he was in my fucking class. understanding of combustion engines and propulsion and all these different things that he's creating and did experiments with lower hominids they did experiments with primates and added their DNA and manipulated the DNA to create human beings.

2:04:06 We're almost like dogs in that way. He's uh, like that used to be a wolf. All these different dog species. it's not it's all wolves everything came from a wolf i have a bob lazar question and it's not that They eliminated a lot of shit. Not to harp on it, I just. It's exactly the same as he describes it now. That's why eyewitness testimony is so unreliable because even a truth teller will make mistakes

2:07:15 these crafts and the way the propulsion system works and the fact that it uses this incredibly Like, one of the ways they know that the Yucatan was hit with this gigantic asteroid that killed the dinosaurs 65 million years ago is a layer I like the fact you're skeptical. He gives us all hope. and then getting Bob to come here and sit down. It was very hard to get him to come in. Yeah.

2:09:33 Like, this is not just a regular guy. they're using some sort of a fog machine and they're showing how this gives off a certain space i don't know the answer to this i always want because i've heard of that doesn't everything that are actually behind it I want to know like yeah I'm sure you had done a guy Troy on our show like, a guy who works he's a full of shit

2:12:12 that Neil is an agent. flat earth guys? Like, why would they pull him aside? Okay, alright Troy Was there a match? He was. Fucking jacked Yeah Dude. I really like him. i know look at the fucking sideburns yeah that's sweet very 70s sweet don't you wish you could grow Yeah, me too. But I'm fucking a little like, God damn, man. Extremely. That's my side gig.

2:15:42 Tickets just went on sale. He was losing that fight, though. fought a guy who is a real world-class kickboxer, who is also his size naturally, and is also a Now, we didn't see Rosenstreich use that sort of strategy against Alistair. He was really it would have probably fallen off and then they would have had to stitch up take a patch off the finishes online.

2:18:33 Show it! It's exciting! People want to see it. At the end of it? It's got Quintet, Eddie Bravo's Combat Jiu-Jitsu's on that, he walked away yeah if he had jumped on him and they stopped it i would get it but you could see that's a good point. Interesting. I would be like, Watch this. you're right, When I saw it, I was just so stunned that he caught him in the last

2:20:52 Wasn't Rodriguez losing that fight too, if I remember? israel you have to do mandatory uh military time you are and your thing with that have you talked He's not a quitter. and but fighters i feel like it's a different thing. It's not just a sport. and believe me, that's possible. is because Conor performed spectacularly that doesn't mean that Jose Aldo didn't show up or Jose Aldo quit.

2:23:43 You know, I like him more than I used to, too. than I ever liked him. He definitely handled himself was stiff and he was going to be able to take him out Rafael dos Anjos, world champion. He had his arm tied behind his back. You know, my favorite one was talking about Conor McGregor, and he's like, send me location. john jones has one bullshit loss where the referee decided that the elbows were illegal and the

2:26:06 I want to see that Santos rematch more than I want to see Jones fight anybody. He's just siding the kickbox with these guys. But, at the end of the day, a great fight. I didn't score it though I know the leg kicks in the first round were really, because I was saying something's going on. where it just gives out. And he got to a split decision on two blown out knees

2:28:21 His knees so all the soft tissue that separates the two knees, the two bones rather, all that's Tiago? Cutting too much weight Which is interesting Yeah. And John has those little His body just won't build larger ones? No, it's weird is that because he doesn't work them or is it by somebody's just won't genetics those larger ones yeah it's just genetics but listen it's a fucking perfect combat

2:30:14 of guys. He's the GOAT. Yeah, he has fought everybody. I love DC. He'd be able to take him down Is Francis snapped back so far he could see his feet. The question is like what Stipe is Stipe's the most accomplished heavyweight champion of all time, and now he's won the title for a second time. those were nasty. and DC was honest though. and he just wanted

2:32:20 I think it was a perfectly placed punch. Because of a couple of those shots he took. those a year maybe yeah and then for like six months you shouldn't do jack shit you should go He's a young guy, just like Adesanya. He's one of the most powerful guys that's ever fought in that division. He's not even built like a real human his waist is this tiny thing his muscles are fucking preposterous

2:35:00 And if that was the case, he would have won the title. It's like, what if Tiago Santos is the UFC light heavyweight champion now? interesting yeah i'm looking forward to that i don't remember when the fight is but i'm looking I'm super pumped for Dominic Reyes and Jon Jones. And he's a young guy. Jamie. Look at the difference in the reach. shoulders, but Dominic Cruz's footwork and movement is excellent.

2:37:39 Am I crazy to think that Gustafson had that kind of reach too? and when he moves in, boom! He drops confusing to me because he walked away like it was over and it looked KOs guys. He can KO people with And no one thought that OSP was going to go the distance. He drops him. And the referee stands over and lets him get back up to his feet. because Dan's supposed to be the guy that calls the fight, right?

2:40:15 I love how he did it, too. southpaw again. So he's looking for that left kick again. There it is. Yeah, it was like 20 seconds, 21 seconds when he hit him. That is it! You know? I thought Gustafson was ahead maybe two to one, and then rounds four and five, Jones won. He said he always gave after they told us like no man the fights not happening I thought like he

2:43:11 that dominic reyes is the most dangerous fighter john jones has faced since daniel carmier i think guys like Chris Weidman, to knock out OSP I think we're going to see the best John Jones. who he was in the second fight with Daniel Cormier killer John Jones next weekend. I think he's going to see a fucking killer John Jones next weekend. But right now, man, I fucking love it.

2:45:09 Wow. Dun, dun, dun. I think Conor really wants Khabib. No. And then who knows how that fight goes, how long Khabib takes to get better. is if he gets the kind of numbers that Floyd huge superstar in the muslim world No, we had the fight. is the toughest fight of Khabib's career. And I had Josh Thompson in here the other day. his fucking hands like he ain't normal

2:48:06 He's got all this crazy shit he does where he does wing chung dummies and break dances. You know that said khabib's the fucking man. I mean no one runs through people the way khabib does he smashes people Yeah. I mean, it's been scheduled? I just want the up on that offer but i'm not gonna do it until yeah she's the co-main for john trance right yeah

2:49:55 by rooting for someone you're kind of by knocked out i was like god damn this is it was painful like i couldn't sleep after the fights i'd be i'd be just thinking about it Like, we're not even friends. some of his last fights i'm like god damn it you know he was a legend and in his prime he's like When Frankie got on top of him and was just smashing him,

2:52:08 We've never experienced To be a world champion Did he uh? He was working Panette might have died And I saw him I was close. you get out! It was like a gala, and all of us were bombing. He had so much power. hard too when you're when you're fat and your whole thing is like, I'm a big fat guy. We have the same manager now. You fucking asshole You're funny period

2:55:39 was doing some shit with on it remember that time you were working there and i came to see you at So if you don't think that if you got getting better because there's a lot of pressure That happens with gamblers, too. And then one day you see them all fucking eyes wide crazy looking like they're exhausted What am I willing to give up to get it? behavior and you wonder like what is the root of those kind of obsessions like what what evolutionary

2:57:52 real gambling junkies loved being in action come on what do we got and that was a thing a lot like the drug thing i can't and how out of I'm just calling the fight. that would come out you know they didn't know but what do you You've got to put all the money on that guy. hard to do. It's hard. Really hard. I think he's a fucking monster, but I don't know. I don't know who's going to win that fight. I mean,

3:00:37 guys don't retire undefeated, so He's a great fighter, but it might get in your head a little bit. and he really psychologically had an issue, didn't fight his fight. stood a chance but fucking ran through him, than he's ever been before. You know, he went five rounds with the GOAT. The next time I see you, I will have trained. I think he did obsess with it.

3:03:16 or blood pressure? he loved drinking and eating and stuff but then he got obsessed with jujitsu and he did he got That's right. She was right. But if you take classes, Like I like having a trainer Because a bunch of people You know My breathing sucks. It's 4 o'clock. Yes Yes I got one scene