Joe Rogan Experience #1476 — Patton Oswalt Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Hello, everybody. I have an announcement. The podcast is moving to Spotify. I signed a multi-year licensing agreement with Spotify that will start on September 1st. there when we cross over. Thanks. All right, we're rolling. Patton Oswalt, how are you, fella? I know. We see each other like ships passing in the night at the comedy store. everything i appreciate comics i appreciate just being able to talk to you i appreciate to be just

2:31 It's so – like I miss that so – because I'm trying to sit down and write every day. Occasionally an idea just comes and I start going with it and then I build it up on stage. lose all of that this bit and this bit and that's what it is yeah it's a weird art form where we're those those sets are going to record those sets too. Those sets are going to be recorded.

4:45 You can still get it, right? No one said, hey I don't feel so good, maybe I shouldn't do this Are you willing to do that? Are you really willing to have something on your phone that shows who you've been in contact with and who your phone has come near and whether or not they're negative or positive? And a lot of people that recover from it, apparently, they didn't even know they had it.

6:48 It's like you most likely didn't have it. day where i'm like fuck what if this mutates you know right or what if i just did something that i It's very rare. If we do get to go back doing comedy, I just feel like I'll never talk about this on stage. Or on the other end of the spectrum, like Joey Diaz will come up and do the rawest, most personal, Yeah.

9:55 Oh, yeah, he got it real bad. Then his friend, while he was suffering, And he was in the hospital for a week. a ventilator then it turns out in new york city and they don't know if this is a correlation or They put him on that hydroxychloroquine shit and little bit we can build you back up you cannot go back to whatever your regimen is let yourself

13:11 of people with deficient vitamin d is not just a vitamin apparently according to her it's actually Yeah. Like, look, I get my blood tested. so they're out in the sun all the time so the body's protecting itself from cancer with the disease it just i've i reread guns germs, and Steel about the Spanish flu and the way that diseases, you know, rewire and reboot your body to benefit themselves and stuff.

15:55 But somehow or another, it's okay to go to the grocery store. is a way to keep your immune system strong. And we're only looking at keep away. We're not looking no it's so weird it's all these back and forth like everything you say is right but we don't It's a huge problem. is cut money for schools yeah which is where such a big part of the population is alive because of

19:26 flames of materialism that have gone through our society during these soft times and people just a nice sweet spot where the the waves weren't there it was nice and calm it wasn't too hot out if a radical drastic change isn't made. Every one of my five blocks is taken care of. That would be cool if we could shift to that. than when we were growing up.

23:23 Well, one thing that we are it'll all fucking crumble dude i've had that argument with people that stupid libertarian They're bad people. The inspectors are there to protect the people that are actually doing it correctly. is really complicated and people love simplistic answers and simple that less government answer And it's flawed. for this we plan they plan to make as much money as possible by selling as much food as possible

26:36 went up on the same night for the first time no shit that's wild it was 14 i I was 19. Wow. Yeah. But so then, okay, maybe you saw this then. He had to go crash on someone's apartment because they weren't. there's going to be this happening again Yes. your needs. Why am I sick the next day? like you can maintain childhood like childhood instincts or childish notions while still being a responsible adult

29:19 Then you got to be the. She'll ask my wife first. won't flake either way there's always consistency um and i'm the flakier one so my daughter just like you my lockdown means you got to eat a lot of processed food because it lasts longer. missing in this country in a big way is that we'll we'll spend a lot of money fixing up other places If there's a photo op and our name can be tagged in it.

32:32 for that right and then people go i don't even know what they're talking about but whatever happening in Charlotte, in Tuscaloosa, because all those now where it's like who who the fuck would want to be president right who the fuck would want that like Biden. It's terrifying. feed or YouTube history, whatever you want to do. So there's this wave coming up like, uh,

36:17 did 10 years ago everyone's going to go yeah you should see this shit i put it like that won't is yes it's scripted but it's scripted mayhem and destruction they are scripting out these people, these men and women going in the script, um, uh your definition of fake needs to be tweaked a little bit in this case. But it's still pretty badass. operation trying to launch itself. And they had even less resources than they do now. But those

39:28 Yes. My most conspiratorial thoughts are that this is this is see that we're in the protein pods it's like that's going to freak them out so let's make there's a very strong case to be made where I have a nice job and I eat a right right give them that i we tried to be nice well I think we evolved you try to solve things and figure things out There's a part of us that will push against that even if it's deadly and even if it's selfish because it's part of what made our species you

44:02 like the human need to sort of overcome adversity there's because it puts them in the position that's a very tricky position. i don't know what you're talking about in particular because i didn't see trump do that It was at one of his rallies. Like, didn't he say something like that? Yes. mean i've made i've been very successful i've made a lot of money and like like that he that's

48:33 feel like one of the reasons that trump has been able to stick around in office and he's gonna like he needs to be coached if he had a coach like someone who's like very socially astute fucking tight writing. That's not in his nature. And then they had to like, they had to like get him to stop doing it because like we're trying to get a story about Biden.

50:33 He could use a coach. i'm suddenly lost i just watched a guy shoot a guy and now i'm thinking of 20 other things and part of me is like boy i feel really healthy you know yeah i i feel like as good as i've ever You're allowed to have ups and downs. here we are. I know. Isn't that insane? That's the reason why we get up all in this business long enough it's up and down and up and down but the whole thing is fun because

54:24 I feel like such a fraud every two years. And if I ever get to be on stage, it'll be like when we see each other at the comedy store. couple weeks especially after a special i'm like boy i might have hit the fucking bottom of the And I miss it. some didn't he ended with the seven dirty words because you know i gotta end my show It was a weird time for his career.

57:17 There was a lot of shit that was going on in his life at those times. the desert there's always that moment of like sometimes your bravery helps bring about a world You're enjoying the freedoms you're enjoying partially because of the shit that she did. shit this is what i do i make fun of things and i'm gonna make fun of you and i make fun of me filmmakers,

59:34 Like you, and also what's wrong with I love comic book movies. But the other thing about film to think about a guy like Scorsese, where he needs to be put in much a much better perspective, is that when you think about some of the stuff that he did in like the 70s, what movies had only been around for like real movies for like 40 years like king kong like in the 30s and then

1:01:45 Any of you guys are like, are we pushing too far? It's okay. I have friends who love stuff that I hate, raised and i know why he is the way he is he grew up in a monster factory and it was really well it's not for me, but I don't care. Patton. But now I can see, because I've seen little babies become little people and i go oh okay you just got terrible input terrible feedback

1:04:10 Even if they're being horrible, think about why they're doing this. There's no forgiveness. Because otherwise otherwise the only time do you have in a day how much time is spent on things you hate and how much time is spent on about how I don't have any Trump jokes Well, it's all the things, too. Oh, yeah, for sure. You know, I'm terrified. We got one.

1:08:15 he might not even survive i mean he looks so bad but all trump does is it's just it's just uh uh He's Paulie in Goodfellas. He tries to be edgy, which makes him ten times edgier. That man needs some mushrooms. oh yeah, okay, maybe I need to like like just anything to shrink yourself in the universe yeah and make you more It's like this is madness. That's when people say they pot make some paranoid.

1:11:17 advocated the use of psychedelics or drugs but my god if i could write on this level maybe i and he's a hunter s thompson enthusiast and he posted this the hunter gave it to this couple So, but the story is so quick. the roof of a building with tom petty's free falling playing on a boom box like maybe lie in to melt and move a little bit. And then bounced, like they were in line outside of a sound, like just kind of bounce. Like they were in line outside of like a sound check,

1:14:18 It was the perfect time to take, your special, the name I Love Everything. Include Because he's a friend I hope I see you in person Good luck with your special.