Joe Rogan Experience #1981 — Pauly Shore Transcript

Transcript

0:00 the joe rogan experience train by day joe rogan podcast by night all day You looked super comfortable. and after I, you know, put my finger under his boob sweat, it's really in my veins. Like just the punk rock club like all the posters that you see that are Yeah, well, I'm allowed to say it. They fucking nailed it. I don't know how they did it, but we have the same architect, fortunately.

3:14 And, you know, first of all, I'm so proud of you. and I know how far you've come. You know, like really funny, dude. from comic to comic. I've seen the best. You're really in the pocket. Like I knew I was going to live out here, and a lot of them knew that I tried to do it at another place I mean, it's fucking dope. There's open mic nights two nights a week just like the store.

6:27 the platform that you gave them, you know. And it also keeps people from being distracted. Yeah, trying to keep up with email. last time I was talking about the career and this and that, and all these different things. And, And, you know, the stuff with my family and the world and all these fucked up things kind of happen to us and Yeah, that's so fucked up for kids because they're just constantly comparing each other's likes and who's got more followers and they're all competing against each other.

10:10 What'd you do with the extra toys? Well, I do, but I don't, like, I choose. He's awesome. So how do people like that get to you to get on your show? don't know the title but him and pedro pascal oh my god that movie's good yeah he's uh he's So, I mean, not to dismark Miriam, I don't If I know any people that I think that So it was half my office, half of it was the podcast studio.

13:15 go back and listen to my early ones I was terrible just you get better at it and I think that what So did you prepare for this? Oh, like scientists and things like that. Yes, he's a quantum physicist. It's like he's hanging out with toddlers. This guy was making a particle collider in his basement or in his garage it's but there's a lot of hipsters

15:36 Is it like you're red living And I think that what I'm pushing back against is the crazy ideologies. Coleon Noir told me about this because he's a lawyer and he went to San Francisco. Like $240,000 a year. Sadness. I think during the Reagan administration, that in a good, just society, to be cared for you know they're so compromised that in a What not to do when you physically walk in a bar.

18:49 streets. When I was a boy, I remember a marked increase in homeless people in Dude, I'm not running for anything. We're going to take a picture. mental health institutes, who knows if that wasn't like more profitable for the overall society? in the greatest country in the world. Well, I think, if anything, we should open up all possible options and make them legal.

22:12 Can you put up, is it ibiscent? Is it part of the ayahuasca thing? We'd have less people that are addicted to pills. I think we should explore that. in a you know the the doctor my mom paid like 20 grand or 10 or 15 whatever it was and they you baby in me what are you doing put stem cells. Put the baby in me. It's so funny. Yeah. That is the reason

26:04 stem cells and then when I looked into it I was like oh no no, like this is crazy. They're killing babies for stem cells and then when I looked into it I mean, I think it's... Right. No, it wasn't leaky. And he's like, let me see your dick. So I did a procedure called resume it doesn't sound like he goes Steam it. which in turn creates a more open urinary pathway

29:02 i might even seen you with the piece back i had a piss bag yeah so do'm saying high five to my friend. I might have even seen you with the pee bag. And you had a piss bag? I had a piss bag, yeah. I'm like, don't worry. no driving from LA connected to my leg mean dump it out oh you just every couple hours you dump it out yeah okay but then you never like

30:36 we all went to dinner i'm like paul you have some asparagus if i knew the piss bag on and then if i let everybody know it's tough to sell So we're just gonna give this everyone just start walking around with a piss bag. Yeah, they need one for shit Paulie. Oh, yeah, you have one in the other room. Yeah, that's dope. Both of them reset your brain so well.

32:10 Yeah, it's the best. but I moved back to L.A. Everything's awesome. It's fun. For sure. Tony Hinchcliffe was one of the first. I mean, you're creating this Emerald City for New York and L.A. And they have a really nice room that's like i think it's like 500 seats right down the which is on 6th, and we're on 6th. rooms which always happens you know like open micers it's one of the things open micers have

35:30 Like, God damn, do you really want to take on this? they're crazy, they do this, they do that, and Kerry, the people that we knew from the store, They can figure it out. And then mostly the small room is the developmental room? Yeah. It's like, can you lower it more? Tony had some suggestions. and I'm like, okay, Because the star, like the light in the OR, we have a blue light and a green light.

38:52 They go upstairs. It's horrible. Yeah, so should we tell Curtisis to do that oh you already do you have screens on screens yeah we have on the bigger, okay. Yeah, so if I perform there's things yeah i was a shorter to cook at the Comedy Store in Westwood. care of comedians what year was this this was uh probably 84 84 85 i was in high school he hit in

41:43 And so she acts out in the parking lot the whole bit about him. It never ends. That night, that was 1987, and that was at the Roxy on Sunset. to take the top off the saltwater fish tank was a big black top and i took it down he dumped all oh my god and then I just described it yeah I mean Lois Bromfield babysitted me Jackson Perd him babysitting me, it was no. So that was just the way it was described.

43:37 Like, you know, the kid wanted to be like Mike. Wow. I mean, I'm there now, and it's great, obviously. I mean, Eddie Murphy used to show up with like six Rolls Royces. Look at this right here. When did Eddie retire? i think the hard part would be like doing it just getting going i think if he did it once It was really beautiful. So I saw him at, I reconnected with him at Dave Chappelle's show

46:23 But I go in there, he's the same fucking guy that he was you know 20 30 years ago of course most people are they just they do It's kind of isolating. Do you ever pinch yourself and see what you've really— But I'm just saying, because again, I've seen it. What they're doing is what's exceptional, and they put in the work. It's gonna crush it. It's on Netflix.

48:47 Oh, that's good. So it's R-rated. I think you'll like it. It's amazing the shows that popped off. Like, do you think Tiger King would have become as big? Absolutely not. Whatever whatever person got their Free Joe Exotic. And then when you watch a movie with great actors like Pacino why they're not making good, and how hard it is to make a movie now.

51:55 And they found that out through Fear Factor Like, that was it. Miss Pat's show is fucking hilarious. No, Greg Giraldo had a show. He was right next to us. We were filming fear factors or filming news radio as well There's a lot going on that makes those things unappealing. And he had all these cables that ran from the talk show set up to a server room.

54:51 So when you saw Tom Green's show, that's when you and Red Band sat on the couch. yeah and then in 2009 we started doing a podcast yeah and just fucking around So I got super excited when I was going to be on this like I did back in the day when I got on Letterman. It's like, you're a good dude, man. to see you killing on stage it reminded me of the OR

56:48 Everyone would sit down. No, that was funny. You would walk in. He was really fucking nuts. Everyone goes left, he goes right. Yeah. He's a funny motherfucker. And they're killing for 25, 30 people. At the store? Wow. Yeah. Yeah, Don Barris is doing great over there, too. Do you know how the whole store started, right? My father was- But my dad, a lot of people don't know who he is and what he's about.

1:00:41 could see Sammy shorts that's all red fox red fox i did And he was in this relationship with this woman, my mother, it was like that and they moved the wall yeah but yeah my dad my dad you know he he uh he took one and then he took off. And, you know, that's when that whole, you know, when the whole thing where My mom was like, he fucking blew it. But that was a big shot for him.

1:03:50 Look at this. This was a big deal He just wanted to be a free spirit, just wanted to be on the road. and she would you know and it was tough for me and you know that natural a natural so good natural and when yeah i mean it was it was hard How old were you then? I was like, fuck you. I don't want you to hang out with Sam anymore. um the westwood boulevard is here and then you got wilshire, and then you got Olympic. You know that?

1:07:03 You had Andrew Dice Clay, Roseanne. You had Arsenio, Sam, Carl LeBeau, and Dave Tyree you had Andrew Dice Clay Roseanne you had Arsenio yeah he was are looking at me for They probably will. And Alan Stevens used to, he used to, remember Alan Stevens? And she'd get off of me, Argus. And we'd drive by the whiskey and Black Flag was playing there. Is that when Argus was in his drug days?

1:08:55 I've only been there a couple of times, but it's like, for you know that they would go there no That place has been around forever. Their steaks are fantastic. It's not just like go there to dinner. And like he did those six minutes on Rodney or whatever it was, sold out 3,000 seats. read his brother bill his book yeah brother Sam yeah looks called brother

1:12:21 manager that i've had for 25 years his name is l Lester. Hey, Lester. What's up, Lester? Yeah, so Sam, you know, he was, Yeah, he was, you know. you know um i mean we're all disciples yeah we're all disciples of your mom Me and my mom's caregiver, Scott, we'd always put her in the car and drive her. And then she'd be like, why is that marquee like that?

1:15:24 Not do. Whether good, bad, it's not us to say. And she goes, what's going on? So she wasn't a real, Because if she was that way, she would never run the club the way she did. yeah in so many ways heart attacks you know people freak the fuck out you know like you're And that's how much she loved Richard Pryor. Doing the Comedy Store in Vegas was a huge deal.

1:18:26 mecca it was the place that everybody talked about like you got to get to the comedy store your jokes because you're really funny and also because it meant he's sitting I'm like, I'll do it. Very funny guy. But it was like, I did the open mic hosting because I wanted to make sure it was set up you fucking think he's funny, she would get so mad. just going through her papers and shit

1:21:16 was going to go down there she wanted to make sure that you were tested throw you into the fire and having one person who's like ruthlessly critical up the street from me and my mom and she just didn't buy into it that's so funny you know what i mean she didn't buy into it Yeah. People ask me, like, hey, when you're doing all your movies, did you ever do Saturday Night Live?

1:23:56 And then you would start getting people going to see people He said, and that's another thing. I love Letterman. I don't know the history of that. The fuck is going on with him? it was like the greatest gift for real dude i'm like mom can i go on stage these people are here to see me you're not ready oh my god I used to put him in the back bedroom.

1:26:46 and they're just at the mothership if you're gonna do it right Russia could do that Don't beat them Yeah for 35 years i love it now even more than I loved it back then. I just love it. you know most people don't really get to do what they truly love to do. Least stressed. Big time. Yeah, we're very lucky. It's interesting because when I'm there now, I look around and I see her there.

1:30:45 touring around were you doing mostly bowling alleys no but i mean you're doing the road are It was fun to see. even if I'm not performing there, it's uncomfortable. It's the guy from the movies. And that was the first time i was ever bowl. No. And he could have done 20 more nights. Yeah, he was there. I think he did like an hour and a half. other comics and it's just like i can't connect yeah you know what i mean and with him like i

1:34:18 My mind goes to, because those are the people that I saw on that stage. He's always doing stand-up. I went to his little town. Because we were at his house, and he did that vitamin drip. No, they did connect me that day. If you don't feel well, it's really good. Yeah, I think Adam Ray, I saw him recently in West Hollywood, Right. It's in the arts district.

1:36:33 It's hilarious. There's great restaurants. Right? the bottle service girls So, and I had known Nicolas Cage because we went to the same high school from back in the day. And then he'll like text me I'm like, you don't need this. Yeah, but you're a little more sensible. But he's not on social media. He's like, come over. What's up? Of his dick? Right because because of these is his nephew's that what is yeah?

1:39:55 You know, because America or the world, they don't think like, oh, that's Francis Ford Coppola's nephew. But that's, what a great move, too. Raising Arizona. Yeah, he's a good dude. Dude, how about Leaving Las Vegas? Did you see Pig? Yeah, it's fucking great. Oh, he looks wild as fuck. Yeah, he's such a sweetheart. No, not quite. Did you ever see The Old Man?

1:42:45 Does that make sense? It's one of them movies. I haven't seen that one. Like Vegas is a real scene now. That's supposed to be really good. You know? Yeah, well, sometimes it's like on a monday i look at some of the schedules you know the last i don't say the last time i was at the the tropicana but i remember like you because he's your bro but everybody knows it's not really him right like but they still pay

1:45:17 Oh, wow. Steve what is his name? Steve Perry. Steve Perry retired from Journey and then Arnel See if you can find one of them. Going anywhere The shadows searching in the night These are young people. Which is Huh. accent. Actually, play some Steve Perry. It sounds amazing. Not really, man. Johnny Winter. I mean, look at that. But put on Lane. He's great too

1:51:41 He's a talented motherfucker It beeps it. That's a big old pile of hand bones Yes, you do. I do? Well, I hosted MTV, so I was- so in the band Maybe we should dim the lights, bro. It's lame know in terms of like you look at the guys that we we all worship like hendrix did heroin uh morrison It's just like, you know. He'd be a great guy to have on your show.

1:57:21 and he would shoot heroin and after he'd shot heroin he would sit on the bathroom and he would shoot heroin. Fuck. And after he'd shot heroin, he would sit on the bar stool like this. He couldn't miss. And he was just firing balls in. Maybe I should do heroin. coke no one believes that which is very insulting because i tell the truth about everything but that

1:59:16 I think everybody loves it. almost when you semi-paranoid when you write do you do you smoke a doobie yeah right before yeah a place where i feel like this is funny enough i know where it's going enough that i can talk I'll just sit and write about caffeine. even though it's a ridiculous thing to say maybe this is good for society right this happens you

2:01:44 You fixed it instantly. I record this conversation. and decide that the people in the other group are the bad people and we're the about whatever the fuck is going on and with russia and ukraine spilling over into the united I'm not the person to talk to you about this. Why do you guys need a new army? Now, if you're in the business of telling jokes, that's great.

2:05:19 you could fucking do it and then it's chaos And the question doesn't become whether or not he should have done that. Why is anyone involved in this why are groups of people? Yeah. Yeah, but I think it would have been fucked up anyway. There's a lot of mistakes that have been made that didn't have to be made. That's not how it's supposed to do it. It's like it's in there.

2:08:35 Yeah, I never remembered that. and know that they have to hit certain beats where you see people with differing opinions now Why are you insulting each other? Because it's like you're just virtue signaling and complaining. But I do think that Tucker Carlson used to be a deadhead. I think it's entertainment. Hi, I'm Pauly Shore with the news. brian brian williams remember him on msn loved him yeah he was good i thought he was great

2:12:13 But Hillary Clinton did that too, right? The thing is, it's like you don't really know these people very well. Imagine. Oh the fuck down right speak normal. What are you doing? Imagine if that's how people talked forever you would go mad Yeah. la right i didn't know people you know people in Iowa would be like, The big fat guy with the missing teeth?

2:15:08 who I sent it to, because I sent it to someone recently. definitely sent it to quite a few friends, but I don't know where it is. I have to find it. So hard. They hit him in the balls with a hockey puck. Right in on the sack. Mmm. But yeah, it's some, you know... It's just they have to adjust to a different time you know but if you don't want to do that anymore as a comic you don't have to do

2:17:58 Yeah, you know and I thought that just he thought about it for a long time. Yeah worked on that set for a long ass time Because if I'm not getting a movie offer, if I'm not getting a TV offer, and I'm going on stage, I'm touring, I still want to do other shit. And it's a good thing for several reasons. and they're not attached to this thing that can't accept them

2:19:35 Where you could pause it anytime you want watch it whenever you want like a regular talk show. It's clunky. It's clunky Nobody thought this was ever going to be a big thing. know what the answer that is but whether it's virtual reality augmented reality I wonder if you can airdrop a FaceTime request. and you want to buy her a It's a scenario where it would be good, but everyone has to be on the same page.

2:21:53 you're not i mean they were talking about having uh like a portal to the internet that's like and the door opens. Oh, okay. Oh, you're talking about an implant. You will keep that Walmart ring. Or if your dog gets, it's actually for your dog gets picked up by the pound. He's like, there's a giant revolution that's going to change the world, and it's about to happen.

2:24:05 There's a mad race right now between these giant corporations and between the country of China. Well, what it looks like now is like some super fucking science fiction-y space shit. is all cooling and that small box at the bottom with that blue light on it, that's the computer. But that guy is one of the people that's involved. I think that's a correct statement, is that right?

2:26:23 to explain is like, it's like, It's more like a microchip, but a little bit bigger than a microchip, obviously. So how big is the actual chip? That's the computer. universes simultaneously i'm gone right you say that i'm like i don't know what you're saying If he said that was recovered from a crashed UFO in Roswell, New Mexico in 1947, I picture them doing the same thing, but finding an

2:28:43 Like solar or something? you know, even if there's no Wi-Fi or nothing, It's so crazy they can send a video through the air and you can get it a second later. Even pictures. And then shortly after that, people are sending copies of movies. Well, when it first really started fucking people up was with Napster. You can't sell records anymore. we used to always record off the radio.

2:31:19 Would you stop an A.I. Sam Kinison album Okay. this kind of sucks, but you could play it for a kid Because if you wanted to rewrite Kennison, he doesn't have cultural references. Yeah. Yeah, that's a very good point. if I wanted to go to a VR was too jacked people got upset yeah like enough with the hologram but it's also weird do you feel I took my little tape recorder and I actually recorded.

2:34:09 But I was just like, I don't think there's anything they can do about it. But what I'm saying is just with things that are on the internet, his set was not streamed live on YouTube Wow. And he, like, he went into saying, I think when he found, For the people that were there though. Yeah, that was like... they're recording them. Not only that, if that's the

2:36:46 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I will never stop touring. Beautiful.? I'm all, I'm never stopped. Social media? I'd like to come here more often Fucked Up City This is cool. on my website. Okay. Okay let's go with that Oh my god So your neighbors are out there watching you perform? So go over there. Okay. That's on the 20-year anniversary is this year. Have fun.