Joe Rogan Experience #20200222 — Fight Companion - February 22, 2020 Transcript

Transcript

0:00 No more vaccines, alright. Yes? And Fight Companion You never know He goes, with all the other comics yeah, no, Each room comes with its own red scarf. I don't know what it is. Like this is what he should be doing. Now it's like a political statement. how i want that's like the shining i wonder how they how they operate like that it's strange right

3:15 I forget how to say his name. he's like you know the protege and he's the guy who's going to do it all for Bellator. Really? Yeah, I watched Bolanos lose, and then there's just too much going on. I'm going to watch it at home got a fat fucking chunk of money. I'm going to watch it at home. That's it. Tyson Fury. How did he survive It was really early.

5:17 Bermain, Stivern. There's memes of it. Well, I would say yes. He put on 10 pounds of lean muscle for this fight. And to me, when I see that, and you know, Tyson Fury is my favorite boxer. fury for the rematch. Pretty easily Jamie put up the fight card How do you say it? John Anik's the best at it His last name? Yun-Jit-Chick? Yeah, Ioana is probably the hardest.

7:54 Aside from that one. You want me to grab it? that's what those festivals I know I haven't been how about that HBO comedy festival First and last. people were partying and skiing and no one got any deals there was no deals what a waste of time Salute, boys. This is a company from the fucking 1700s. I feel like a trader. Ear pound it. Is that where they are?

10:28 And fucking Imagine you fly 15 hours you know she's only been doing martial arts all just any martial art for 10 years damn what she She's fun. God, you just root for him more. How about that one fight that we saw live on the show? I know. And he's like, I need one spot. Oh! Oh, it's not? He might have it. He stood up. Dude he's great I think he just feels like

13:32 He was way thicker before. I was like, oh, wow. You have less tissue than your body's pumping blood through. Well, that's true, too. Crazy. That ain't happening. He was a little chubby in the first fight. Well, we'll see what happens. He throws punches while he's switching. That's not his MO. because it's in their contract. Yeah. So he's slimmed down a lot.

16:46 I know On what 35 pounds Almost 30. But he also loves quesadillas. He's a world champ. Yeah. you're like oh yeah that's happening for sure yeah for sure a lot of amateur fights yeah My number one fight You don't think so? This fight's pretty good right here. With that MAGA hat. You can't wear red hats Someone will try to fuck you up That said make Bitcoin great again And someone got maced in the face because she had a hat that said, make Bitcoin great again.

19:57 If you get maced for having a stupid hat, how about those pussy hats those girls wear? They're these pink. Meow. Because they think, well, Trump did it. No, it's terrible for them. Don't have the experience. No. Oh, did he? There's no way. But they must do something. else. That's when he got in big trouble. Fuck yeah. coke and these two kids found it and so they murdered these two kids and left their body on

23:59 people that were already dead you could tell they were already dead before the train ran over what's with all the major cartel people. Oh, yeah, for sure. Somebody was making an ungodly sum of money bringing cocaine to the United States. And he got on television in front of fucking, what was it? And the fucking whole room was going crazy. Everybody's cheering and screaming.

25:39 Freeway Ricky Ross was the guy who was selling all that shit Like, you know Rick Ross, the rapper? Burrow. Mike Tyson won the other day on Instagram. Holyfield did it. I mean, he was just talking about like his his life and like what Yeah, because Cus was doing it. crazy physically gifted like us i mean uh teddy atlas told me that when mike tyson was 13 years

27:50 Some of the 13-year-olds are like, what the fuck? Kostamada said he would do it backstage before he walked out. You would have him just break these guys down. And he's watching Jimmy Jacobs has this insane library of fights. And you think the hypnosis stuff actually worked? Like a monster. It was a phenom, right? They got to look into that. Diego Sanchez is Coach Mike.

30:22 That guy looks scary. Just destroying people. You could say the same thing. Wouldn't Tyson admit that? I don't think he needed it. He was small. go to some poor soul people do roids in jail oh if you're mike tyson they've got him steaks and For three hours, you only get so much you could talk about, you know. It's like a lion's there. It was me, him, and Brian was there.

32:42 I think it was before the weed. They were probably married, right? Did they broke up they were probably married right did they get Mike Tyson pulls up in a Porsche. You sit on that chair right there Out of all the people in the world Dude Poor Brad Pitt must have been fucking terrified. If they're fine enough, dude, you'll risk it all. the right thing. Going to Asia is the right move

35:06 When Mighty Mouse See Dominic Reyes Those little guys, it is what it is, man. I think with MMA, there's still real exciting fights in the lighter divisions. 45 to 25 is just 20 pounds. It's a big deal, though. It's cracking. One through 15 is banging. Isn't that funny? 45 to 25 is just 20 pounds. What do you think about Adesanya saying he wants to fight Stipe?

36:27 I think he probably walks around about 210, 215 maybe. What's his wrestling background? Six-four. He's had some rough times, so. He's got a bunch of problems. How's he have an injury or something? He's got a knife problem. He's had some rough times. That's what they would do. I mean I'm interested in seeing that He's for sure going to get that title shot,

38:15 I know. And it worked. John Jones. You got Stipe there. is it you know that that could it, that could be it. Two times. Yeah it's just not there He'd still be an underdog I've seen him with other heavyweights. That ain't that old. I mean, maybe if a big fight comes up like a Stipe Miocic fight. and then he's like you know the week before the fight he's at the super ball they can't fly you

41:16 Two years where he really wasn't fighting hamill's face. It wasn't a knockdown like Tyson Fury, Deontay Wilder. I'm excited to see that rematch. Gustafson starched. And, you know, I mean, one judge gave it to John four rounds to one, which is fucking embarrassingly bad. Figure it out. You know what? People just look at fights differently sometimes you know what i mean

43:39 I don't want to say any names. It's such a shit show. And he just thought He's got that big school That's a very good match Use your skills. this dude up and he gets so antsy he wants to get him out there and that's when he gets caught Yeah. I'm like, what the fuck? It's a good story. I was like, oh, this is home. gets out there more because the guys talk about it but it's just like they're like oh he gives

47:12 You only have so much time, man. You got all these guys, and you're trying to manage Everyone's ego Guys That was playing for the Lakers your coach is wearing Like, oh, It's crazy. If a coach is wearing some shit That's business dude This is Coach Eddie over here. Absolutely. That's for sure. and since 2003, That first round, And that's what we're doing.

50:12 Connor. The thick kid got knocked out. What I was saying was there are some fights where Khabib wasn't... He couldn't get past Dos Anjos guard. Tony's phenomenal wrestler Tony there's gonna be Darce's coming on the feed. Are you going to be in Brooklyn? It's that same look. Yeah, for sure. There's the fighting against the fence. Is it going to look like that?

53:03 We got some traps. That's fair. Nobody. the learning part is the easiest part. that's a whole, They know how to teach it. like he was Darshis, there was Darshis all over the place. Why? Everybody knows how to doos that guy like he was there was Darsons is not like a thing him just knowing it dude we work on he already hasn't mastered but we're working on it even

55:34 He had him in the guillotine. Yeah. And we watch those fights, and we see where he has not quite. It's literally ridiculous. I think depending on what Khabib wants to do, No, no, it's old. It's something like when Tony trains or something. He's just on top of the latest That poster's amazing, That's why it's a Darcer. That's all you need. They got that one perfect.

58:39 angles that fight gives me chills man just stop and think about what tony's been able to do to Kevin Lee. He's never cautious. You know what I mean? I mean, probably, Dagestanian guys? and see the young kids there. but we haven't seen anything yet. Well, that's him. He's like, I'm telling you, man. Backstage, I'm talking to all these fighters. worst case scenario. They couldn't handle the worst case

1:01:44 I didn't know anything about Aaron Pico. Even from Joe? Exactly. I'm just focusing on my school, my students. If you want to join in, then you can join in. I'm not looking for that at all. I'm just focusing on my school, And then Joe was telling me. So I didn't know shit. You take dudes down, you pound the shit out of them and you work on. You stick to what you're good at. You take dudes down.

1:03:21 He probably lost that one, right? though, Eddie. pound the shit out of him, Like if the fight ended up on the ground against his will, he would know some shit. like this could be the last day I see this guy. Heavy You know going his own way Ladies and gentlemen. You need a couple bucks? Can we get it? Or guys that want to suck their buddy's cocks. Okay.

1:05:40 Yeah. Well, I think. Whose attitude? I don't play around. Do you guys have a knife? God, you bought all the fucking cheese. I steal it from you and I scalp your stupid head. Nope. You cut me to fucking ribbons. Where's my girlfriend? You know what it is, dude? I hold them and I cry with them. Well it's in New Zealand Let's get these You drop white wine, although it does look refreshing.

1:08:16 Kim Crawford is more over there. Dude, if it's not barefoot, then I don't want it. I love you too. He goes, you want to kiss later? No, right?. I hate you. Should we kiss now? DeLeo one time sent me a text. He goes, you want to kiss later? I go, what? Wally Lang, the champ? Dude, there's no Japanese girls in the UFC. Are there? Exactly. Dude, there's no Japanese girls in the UFC.

1:09:38 Exactly. I was just going to have her, Brendan. She's very tough. Just like, all right. She does this shit for an hour and a half I use a belt though What's that Chinese shit Watching TV. It definitely does happen with some of them. That's what I do. I do that thing with the band. Look at this. That's a... Yeah, very interested. Suffered any yet Muay Thai champion

1:11:58 And then also and do a super fight really she just became champ she's gonna fight Joanne Bare knuckle fighting I like it You guys were, you loved it. That's a great idea. And he looks so good I think he's going to beat, all due respect, $1,000. You won't bet $1,000? You're such a pussy. lose a thousand bucks. I just want you to know that. But wasn't there like a big loss? Didn't he lose

1:14:50 This is bullshit I won And then everyone's like, he does it on purpose, and the fans don't realize it. I have to take you out No he was a hot murder so fucking good but when I'm alone and then goes away. She's a tough lady. It was really funny because people got really mad at me because Angelo was in front of me She's got it locked up. yeah, I can't see.

1:17:34 How do you know about cheese? i i was i cooked for my kid and uh she wanted pasta and steak so i cooked steak for us and I've been eating almost only meat and eggs over the last few months. question what's amazing my energy levels are like the same like you just you never fucking out no I feel like I need less food or I'm more sensitive to food now.

1:19:16 I don't want to tell anybody And you're like, it wasn't even that good. The crazy thing about Voodoo Donuts, they got children's coffins in the shop. Carolina is so tough. She's very trapped out. Yeah, Carolina's having a hard time with that right eye. The only person I ever saw throwing a crescent kick in the MMA was Anderson. This way. Is this the last round?

1:21:01 Keep scoring with that jab. How else are you going to make 50 grand? It's dog shit. And you're saying the UFC, like Maz Vidal. What do you think? Yeah, he's great. I said hey dude I gotta know it where Has he got you in a cheese? I don't like that very... Oh, look at this rolling. That is tight. Oh, shit. Yeah, but she's in, so what? Oh, shit. Well, that ain't working.

1:24:51 She ain't out yet. Her left knee's in big trouble. She can't do shit until she gets that left leg out. She's going to push her right leg, She's Polish. I'm going to freak out. Now the Reap's out. It's the walking dead foot Where is this being fought by the way? She has nothing. If she could underhook that left ankle and pass it to the other side of her body, roof it over right there, boom.

1:27:01 She used the leg lock to get on top. But now look But it's a and sometimes you only see people, I pronounce it I pronounce What do we got? I can't wait. You want to bet on that, too? And if you make one mistake, you're in big trouble. Seriously, though. That's why he kept his shirt on. He's out of shape. Kevin is such a tough... That's what separates him from the rest of the pack

1:29:52 Blow for blow sounds like a cocaine battle, right? Dude, China's stepping up. I thought I had it last week in Ontario. How many people have died from the flu in just America? Every year. Only CNN. That's all I trust. Wait, so we're not worried about coronavirus? He's such a badass. Look at him. Hell yeah. to you wouldn't be loyal to a shit bag no no well you know his relationship with donald trump is

1:32:27 And he died, right? Hell yeah. Jeffrey Epstein was giving Like, why would you blackmail, No, you want to fuck them, right? That just means there's a link. I didn't see him. No, he didn't get arrested No he didn't get arrested Dude you know what the crazy thing is The new AIDS, bro. i'm creating here because you're about to drop some knowledge i don't know let's change the

1:35:37 It doesn't have the same sort of standards that like when you have in Galveston at the CDC center where they have things like Ebola and all these different things in the containment. They have from the virus. can you? That's what I did. I get so scared Yeah, I'm going to try some naked goat. We never have. Have one of the security guys do it? Oh, okay.

1:37:33 That is guns away. Sorry. shine I don't even attempt anymore I know, but it was so tough. If your wife did not want to take your last name and she wanted to hyphenate, I would be like, what the fuck are you talking about? At least half, yeah. Have some whiskey. She's been awesome. I said it to you independently that he doesn't know about, but I said it to him.

1:39:31 He's getting better. Come see me in Omaha and in Kansas City April 3rd and 4th Congratulations Yeah You're back with Chappelle, yeah? You guys doing arenas? Yeah. You doing tinfoil hat shows? Tripoli's one of my favorite people. But I do Sam's show. If you're in front of a crowd never get to that point. I watch him smash high level. us were too afraid to open, because you didn't know.

1:42:08 He's all of us. Oh, here comes the baby jokes. We got that knee brace on That's what I would do Why do you say that Fucking one fourth of that height. That's some dangerous shit. I don't want to talk about it. I think Groot rather there was two You're closer or something. Broke it off the ceiling. us that the chain was falling apart it It had popped before. But it was the perfect explanation.

1:45:37 smart guy he's a really smart guy dude this is uh michael john White is like, out of all the guys who have never fought in MMA or fought professionally, particularly because Kimbo That fight, he didn't let that dude breathe. What's his pedigree? he tore him up no Crute's American that's why he came out You don't see a lot of those. Oh, dude. No. I'm like, I don't know.

1:48:09 floating around inside my shoulder it's the same guy did warrior gavin o'connor i think this is his Warrior. That's also why you hate Foxcatcher, too, right? They made Mark Schultz fight a Russian guy in the UFC. They insinuated Some stuff in the movie Now why did you guys How did we get on the Warrior? And then Brian was like, what the fuck? That's different.

1:50:28 Yeah, one night. He's all cut up. Mark Bernardo is a beast. Jesus. And that stops the Kimura. You got to get it in between his arms we were talking about Kimura. where your shoulder It's a golf ball But I'll tell you one thing, man. for me man is club bells those clubs those metal clubs steel maces we do no it's like it it's a I just want Benavidez to win.

1:53:11 At that age Love Joe Benavidez But Joe is like legitimately one of the Nice. and won. Yeah. Yeah. Everything in Australia is brought there. How weird is it that people that don't live in a certain country have sympathy for the Try raising lamb in lion territory or leopard territory. But meanwhile, the locals are like, these motherfuckers ravage our shit.

1:55:23 They're like, stop, daddy. You can't show lion nuts. Balls. When your dog Yeah it makes sense I know. I love that dog so much He's just the nicest dog ever Oh yeah like crazy At first, I just didn't like the attitude. Yes Like a football You don't understand They're like little balls. They're cute, They're considering and they don't give a fuck no no no they don't but once you give them love yeah with the cat you

1:58:36 I just started petting her. As soon as I walk through the fucking door She has a disorder where as soon as she feels love, It sounds like what? Hey have any of you guys I heard it's amazing I did a theater there It was the most What was it like? Fantastic I heard it's amazing People told me Oh wow A peninsula Comedy show there You eat meat I mean, I'll march around and shoot. I don't want to see it.

2:00:41 If shit went down, I'd go to Joe's house. Nothing dangerous. There's a few animals that are indigenous. A rhubar is a big-ass bumper in front of your car for kangaroos. I didn't make this up. No, totally. A full, full. They actually preyed on humans though The cassowaries, no joke They probably have something Turkey vultures? Dan Hooker is a beast, man.

2:03:14 These guys are beasts, man. Volkanovski It's an amazing gym One hour Hamilton, New Zealand. Can we do it? It's the same thing in New Zealand. He has that. Yeah, he's great. He seems rather tall or is he normal height? Some say freakish. That's how I am dude Oh here If you stand next to them They'll box you the fuck up That's a lot of fucking kangaroos They If you stop, they'll fuck you up if you stand next to them.

2:05:36 It sounds like it's supposed to be from New Zealand. He can't be higher. Dan Hooker's from New Zealand. I feel it's weird that Hooker's coming out first. That division is almost overrun. Every 10 pounds. And then four different fucking organizations. Well, his last fight... Ross Pearson. Interesting. Ah interesting KO'd Gilbert Burns Look at Felder.

2:08:03 I was like, dude, you're so edgy. He was laughing. He's like, man, I can't wait to fight this him. He was like real edgy. I was like, dude, you're so edgy. He's like, this guy's a fucking animal. Now they're edgy. To this day Kind of weird Contender series It's the best night of comedy. Like that right It's not like the store Yeah It was ridiculous.

2:10:18 Yeah, yeah, but I don't want to throw anybody under the bus, but he was talking about certain clubs, like in the Valley and stuff. but I think the reality is he just needed to do more specials. I'm doing it again. So if you watch that special and you say, I liked it. You don't feel loose. a matter of like but the thing is you feel loose because you know you have four shows i remember

2:12:18 We got barbecued. Hinchcliffe. Have a podcast together I was like It's gonna be a wild fucking fight You want to bet on this, you fuck? You've got to go with a theater major. He's dramatic, because he's a theater major. Let's be real. And he's a theater major. You've got to go with a theater major. and he's always this tough. Hooker's already throwing that low calf kick.

2:14:02 Oh, he put it right in his knee. Four already Yeah We're straight, but we're just And Felder's not even checking it. He is, man. He's six and Hooker's seven. shoulders and big ass biceps it's almost like they're they're tommy hearns kind of stuff yeah So that's hard to fight when you got Schaub. You love Hookers? I'm pretty good at burns. Oh, shit.

2:16:44 That was an amazing fight, dude. And he's been training with Duke Rufus as arguably top two or three best striking coaches on planet Earth. Oh, man. Very interesting. Well, chimp strong and ridiculous power. And if you're a hooker fan, you should be worried. Yeah, he's really pressing this fight. I give that round to Felder But that's not enough Not as much.

2:18:56 They don't count really kicks. No, I can't. What happened? See that low kick? Hooker's so long. That right eye looks like it's closed. But here's the thing about those kind of swollen eyes. They're both pretty dialed in. Especially when Felder understands Just waiting for- He wants the title. Nobody's calling out Tony. Nobody ever. Never. He's throwing that low calf kick so much.

2:21:57 Is he going to jump to it? Look at Felder's legs. If you're not, you're not going to do it. Here's the thing. Well, that was just a moment, and there's no damage done. Well, he's throwing it so sweet. that left side of Hooker is a dangerous weapon. With that one low kick His nose ain't helping. Oh! Look at these fucking animals. Oh! Man, I feel like it's

2:25:12 Felder. What do you think? I give it to Felder in that situation there's an edge to Felder. It can't be any worse than New York or wherever the fuck scored... That was not good. You swing sometimes. that's so interesting is he's such a smart articulate guy he's a great commentator but He clipped Hooker with that uppercut. He's got those long arms. Oh, that jab.

2:28:02 He's trying to knock his face off. That's a good exchange for Hooker, too. He makes you think. One or two shots can do something weird That's a nice left by Felder. That one went straight down the pipe. Like QE2. Oh. Oh, my goodness. But two pieces by Hooker, and then he's out. Oh. Oh, nice low kick. Boom, boom, boom. Oh, right hand by Felder. Oh, my goodness.

2:30:00 Yeah, how happy are you that it's five rounds, right? See, whoever wins these next 40 seconds can steal this round. So far, Hooker has this round. Yeah, showing his strength. Yeah. I don't know about that. I can see that too, Eddie. At least they're not in Houston. He should shut down his MMA gym. Yule probably broke his arm. He had something I'm not sure.

2:32:13 I think that's how they do it. Felder's 190 pounds. Look at Felder. Oh, Jesus. He's so crazy. Paul's a fucking monster He's all in. You gotta do it. Let's see who goes out. Now Hooker's starting to show it. That hurt him. Oh, boy. Looking to explode. I don't think either one of them Have a wrestling background He's not going to go into a fight He works on what he's bad at

2:34:37 That's a good question. Yeah, he's going to take him down. Okay, now he's turned around. him back to the center, nobody would give a shit. hooker could take it and but he's also realizing to put him down, man. He can take it. Hooker can take it. He's making it real dangerous. Felder with a jab this is not good Elbow in the clinch by Felder was nice

2:36:44 No Literally, that Hooker's in He's not doing jack shit. Wait a minute. I would say the third round is hard because John is pressing the action. It's got to count for something. Everybody wins that round that's on Felder's side, right? Then you give that third round a hooker. Yeah, you're right. It's control. I mean, again, we're going back to this one theme that we keep repeating, but I think it needs repeating.

2:39:50 No one ever does anything. Oh! It's a travesty. Does that count? Is not working The question is The damage he took We're exactly halfway in. Took by Hooker. It's tough. Real similar. Would you spin around so I don't have to look at them fucking lats? No triceps at all. Oh, and Felder returns with one of his own. Oh, my God. He's trying again. You've got to win him the round.

2:42:44 He got the takedown And he's not doing any damage Because of the takedown Look at him. This is the only significant thing that happens around, so he gets it. it's a close fight man how do you give it to the fight it's real close. It could have gone either way. It was so tight. of our no no not really please don't talk over each other there's other philosophies though

2:44:48 He's wrong. I'm going to thumb wrestle both of you motherfuckers. But it's just not our sport Except for leg strikes If he gets the significant I didn't back you on this one Still being on television Felder. That's such bullshit It is That's a great fight. He was putting on the heat at the end. You got to give it to the guy who's looking the best at the end.

2:47:04 Hey, I didn't make that shit up. He knew it was close. Yeah For a long time That's so classy by Dan Hooker. No, not at all. He's so talented. Nobody talks shit on Felder about his commentary. Handling this too That guy's serious too So bad if there's Let's wrap this up. Yeah, and then April. And then I'm going to be in Kansas City April 3rd and 4th.

2:50:04 I don't know. Tacoma Comedy Club out there. Oh, shit. I've only did Tacoma And then What's the club? I don't know Spokane May 1st I'm in New Orleans You guys at the Comedy Store Tuesday? I'm on it.