Joe Rogan Experience #20200516 — Fight Companion - May 16, 2020 Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Boom, okay. That would have been fun. I'll get down to 55. Yeah, he's a stud. His hands are very good. He'll do wild shit He knows this guy's super dangerous, using his kicks. Okay. You're skimming through it? Yeah, I know. like it's facts. The reason he did so who weighed in at 145.5? Oh, and he weighed eight pounds heavier i don't think well it's florida so

3:16 Dude, whenever I stand next to Kamaru Usman, I'm like, how the fuck do you weigh 170 pounds ever? Well, dude, think of UFC 249 that you commentated. We either miss it by 0.5 of a pound or miss it by five. He's so right. You'd be around Rich Franklin, and you'd go, go rich how the fuck are you 185 pounds ever he's a big guy like why would you do that when you know you're going to have to make weight again?

5:29 We know it didn't help him. Because this is the thing. If you're getting hurt Your cardio goes through the window. Like, it gave me the chills listening to him talk last night. back and do it again he seriously feels great can i ask you this without you getting upset at me Because I know you. I'm not Trevor Whitman. fight, I shouldn't have been mic'd.

7:46 Tony never, he hasn't had a takedown That's where his jiu-jitsu comes in. We knew it was So not even for one second did the camp think, oh, we got this one in the bag. weeks now now it's just engaging with the smart thing uh be to do a totally change tony style It was the weirdest thing. I'm like, I'm not going to be – it's always got to be the striking coach, the head coach, the guy that talks to them.

10:07 I just had it in my head. after the second round, okay, But after that fourth round, walked up to him like okay i'm supposed to give him advice this wide receiver coach like i'm the Ryan Hall got BJ Penn. something like that, a lot of things are swirling through my head and i'm thinking oh my god what the hell what is the You're almost self conscious

12:16 I'm so into it From my vantage point, I couldn't tell. now and he's really tired and he's hurt, wasn't working. I've never been in that situation You know what I mean? You're not giving yourself enough credit. and it's in the jiu-jitsu. But those guys aren't Eddie when it comes to jiu-jitsu. But Matt Hume was also a legit striker. Of course. The best.

14:57 For us, right? You know what I mean? It's like a takedown. In that fight. 20 seconds. Tony's story's There's going to be a rematch eventually. Right now. No, Conor's coming off a win. He did lose to Khabib. How about Gaethje-Khabib and Tony Connors, same card. How crazy would that be? I'll jack off to it right now. Everybody's heads would explode worldwide.

17:36 Bro, Charles Olivera impresses me as much as anybody. But now his striking's right there. And the confidence is there now. I'm telling you, Charles Oliveira might be the dark horse of that division. You don't notice it? People sleeping on him, son. But Tony's out for how long? He's already, he's training to death, dude. When he explained it the way I'm like, when he said, hey, listen, the whole world is struggling financially.

19:32 trevor whitman said that i was really impressed with he said gaethje's the most coachable athlete when he got hit with that big uppercut at the end of the round. And he nodded his head, and he went out and did exactly that. He was smooth. A nightmare. No. But he can't strike, so there's no fair. Maybe not. You think so? and i didn't do it and i'm shooting myself in the fucking i talked to john fitch about it john

22:33 In wrestling. We didn't even watch that Cheeto Vera fight. I couldn't wait to hear it either. You guys are the best team they've ever assembled. We had to have bracelets In the pre-show into the cameras. Do you know when you shook his hand? edited that out like you said something They isolated all the fighters. Oh, hell no. I went to a restaurant every day I was there.

25:00 Just one rib. I don't think. I guess he's going to Texas. Texas is mad. I mean, Austin's liberal as it gets. Oh, no, you sent it to me. I just found out from our boys at Mint Pixels. were pure coronavirus six out of 3.3 million hear me out boys i love texas much of the next guy All these people are talking about it's fear be something that it wasn't.

28:32 obviously people did are dealing with sick patients larger issue i think is that you have people in power especially in and i'm sorry but i feel this we're going to mandate masks Oh, and then snitch on your neighbor. Just like the flu. And getting Trump out at all costs. And there's Jocko's a great friend. I think this is about the expansion of government.

31:55 That's one man. think i don't think they know that motherfucker i don't think they know. Let's recall that motherfucker. 33 million. Because what about someone who lost someone who had it? Let me ask you a question. COVID or a drunk driver crashing into your entire family i will lick but we chalk it up as the price for driving is start doing what they're

34:23 barbecued. No matter what death. You understand what I'm saying? But Paul Krugman has always been – Come on. You took an Elon Musk. Hey, speaking of Elon Musk, you want me to finish my Elon Musk thought? and it's going under and may not come back. first time in my life where i'm thinking to myself that's the purpose of these people might be really The founding fathers knew that.

37:13 right, man. Exactly. And then He was a Ranger. He's a little stronger, a little more powerful than I am. Oh, he's a fucking monster striker. He's a great fighter, too fuck. Okay. He's a starting linebacker for University of Alabama. He's a little stronger, a little more powerful than I am. Yeah. Think about Anders. Starting linebacker. It's kind of scary.

38:47 You're running up And his body doesn't He hasn't been of them. Tall, long. Because you never know. Bro, that was chaos. Who is the company? In the room somewhere. I'm bad with names. There's a pocket knife, a folding knife. Or not. I want to thank Civilware. Run with that. guy what a sweetheart i told you from the jump love stud and and stud handsome kid athletic kid

41:29 and Taron stop I wing the dove but it was beautiful give me the gun you know it's my job and I'm thinking that's this is what i wear you got to give him one yeah i need one for the mountain tomorrow Every day I'm out there. where was he swimming no santa cruz santa cruz was it no was it santa cruz that's close that's You know, one of the coolest things about Fight Companion, to me personally, for me.

43:49 That's huge, man. thing to do to give really unfortunate but what government tends to be always is just people it's just people no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, When the alarm goes off That most of us want to confront A few days ago San Salvadorian He came up Fuck this, dude. Dude, I felt vulnerable. Yeah. Dude, I'm texting you. I think in LA what's going to happen,

47:48 They're so easily fooled. Either way. I thought I read 200. What I'm saying is... why it deaths. it was just filled with car wrecks, against cigarettes. And it happened. Oh, Dude, we're in a the greatest conspiracy last year worldwide Let me just finish this thought. No, what I'm saying is, if I would have told you that a year ago, I said there's going

50:14 Because it's not – you have to realize how many people died versus how many people were out there. to make people aware. If they washed their hands The numbers of the virus are very real. They're getting paid by the government, the defendant. There's so much deception going on right now. they're all working together it's all like all this shit and like wait a minute once a cascade

53:06 the death certificates. Oh, no, they get paid if it's COVID. But not if they find a body. because there's a massive crisis that strains the resources in a way that's unprecedented so and then now there's so much obvious deceit and deception and lies, Everything was wrong. Where people just like us are controlling people. Maybe it's that. because I think all of us

55:24 all of us want to project our vision of the things you said is human beings, when they're in power, when people are in power, when people are in power, all of us want to project our vision of the world on somebody else. That's insane. Human error. of how we got here starts controlling people But Facebook and YouTube and these other outlets That's a huge problem.

56:57 It still exists. That's cool. put on YouTube that Healthy immune systems keep you from dying. This is old school shit. Whenever someone censors, Or there's other reasons These aren't moral decisions. What we're dealing with, guys, is true censorship. mask and their You think he's Team Lockdown. Let me just finish. So whatever. Hold on. 30 seconds, we get back to tits.

1:01:06 that's don't make fun of me you're gonna pretend But what about this? That's team lockdown. I try to help you out. I hope I'm wrong. If you think that this is some three-way game, it's ridiculous. Look, I've talked to the guy a few times. And that's what he is. He's selling all of his houses. Stop with this. I'm going to fuck out of here. We should watch for them.

1:04:35 Every fucking day. Mike Garcia, who's a Republican, won the 25th district. They flip. because they felt like look it's really important to have freedom of speech it's really important No. What archaic system. Plan B. Why does abortion still exist? about it for fucking six months well decide the next day take the pill there's no reason When someone, it's their body, and something happens inside their body, it's making a person.

1:07:45 It should be right away. When do you have to make up your mind? Right, and it's Jesus. quick quick get rid of it now when it's 50 cells when it's a million cells it's a million cells Typically it was the third trimester. Barboza, to my knowledge, at least in the UFC, has never fought at 45 before. It was either that or the Dan Hangman fight. Was that his last fight? I don't know.

1:09:20 Felder, Gagey, then. He's unbelievable Wow damn I hope he does He took a lot of punishment Forget how quick Barbosa is He was thinking about quitting afterwards. I haven't talked to him about it. Oh, damn. Takedowns are interesting, right? He gave him trouble. He looks like a Brazilian skeleton covered in skin. Oh, my God, he's so fast. with me to start a GoFundMe for

1:11:25 Nobody's in? It's the lifeline to America. How about Dana White fucking with his attitude against New York Times? they're protecting everybody. Two corner men had it. He's really coming up in the ranks. First cut at 45? If I didn't hate him enough already, that did it, man. Isn't Gavin Newsom Pelosi's son-in-law? believes anything he says. president.

1:13:44 That's what we did. this robot bullshit He is not going to. And she's like, I'm here, bitches. Hillary and Michelle Obama. If you had to vote, hypothetically, gun to your head, Hillary or Trump? Brian, who would you vote for? You give me a chance because between Trump and Biden, again, I can't believe I'm saying it. I agree with you. It's like everybody has their pick.

1:15:58 of him just destroying Just propaganda And Chris Cuomo How do you get there? It's almost like Brian, you act like the show's called Fight Campaign. Would affect him He's splitting his hands Ige's been making this weight for a long time. Remember how Conor had all that power at 45? It'd be impossible to be stronger. To 125? Remember that scene? What year is that, Jamie?

1:18:15 i only wrestled for one year but what they showed in that movie was the closest to wrestling oh Oh, that guy's a great actor. Dean is spectacular in that movie. He's crazy, but in that movie he's so believable look at shoot more than this. though, right? You'd have to look like one of those guys dad no it's not even dad he would mock his own body. Yeah, I'm not saying anything he doesn't say.

1:20:17 this is a marijuana cough, in case you're wondering, ladies and gentlemen. There's so much pressure But then also He believes the same things He believes in liberty He believes in freedom Constitution He's great. He's one of us when it comes to that. He believes the same things. He believes in liberty. the right thing. That's where I think I'm not talking about

1:21:19 with the propaganda. It's a couple things. But no, what do they say? Where is it? I got some friends who are like, dude, I want this to go on. A lot of people getting unemployed. I have a family member who's like, would you shut the fuck up? That's genius. So do you believe in 80% tax or 75%? possible we can't even get we can't even we can't even get free water americans We can't even get- Well, that's why Bernie did one, right? We can't even get free water. Americans are not socialists.

1:23:40 That's not how they talk, damn it. hey listen, Definitely not true. Oh, it's too expensive. They're going back to Australia That motherfucker Like realize They're gonna get free health Nothing is free He wouldn't do that. Everyone else taking a cut. That's why everyone's cool with it. Good looking guy. All bullshit aside, I wouldn't want to be him.

1:26:21 So let them stay in. Okay, okay. It's higher on logic, but it the average age would also be Yeah, and I love my grandpa too. you're going to spread that to other people yet well this is a part of being people that's right Are you guys going to take this fucking Bill Gates vaccine if he comes up with it? I understand that. care of them yes the exact same numbers for the flu. Every year,

1:29:51 That's a good one. You can't refer to those numbers. But hold on. I mean, it's a contributing factor to your death. Also had leukemia. Once it's proven that they're padding the numbers, they're inflating the numbers, they're forging death certificates. This is all based on numbers but the numbers are forged I want to see that. I know. I know. How much better technique is now than during the Bruce Lee days?

1:32:53 It's interesting, It wouldn't even be close. Like you have, He was never in a ring. nonetheless in a way You're fighting in a cage with Big John McCarthy about to save you. That's what I'm trying to say. Does she just have some surgery? She's great. Not the funniest. We're the canaries in the tunnel, bro. comedy tour, and Trump said said we can build stadiums.

1:34:50 No? Donald Trump You can't just do a concert right now. Are you in? Can I bring my Civil War knife? Brian and I fucking do it. Can I bring my Civil War knife? How crazy would that be? Shut up, Joe. What the fuck am I doing? You guys don't follow Donald Trump Jr.? On Instagram, follow Donald Trump. Didn't he post something crazy about Joe Biden? But that's a crazy thing to even joke around.

1:37:03 Representative? if she said what she should say, No one would ever say, That's so crazy. Joe, if the fake stream media decided to attack you and smear you and fucking connect you with all this crazy shit. store and then Prov and Factory are open? I'm like, dude, they're trying to ruin him on a daily basis. I get it. I know people hate it. But you're coming in hard on the paint, and I'm feeling a little sensitive today.

1:39:16 Hey, someone answer my question. she and i went any any news anything she goes just put a heartbreak emoji this is a very dangerous Over some shit that 80-year-olds die. There is. Yes. You fucking get checked in every X amount of days while the shit is hitting the fan, Test, test, test, for what? contact tracing Of course. They were actually drones

1:42:00 Drones Joe You motherfuckers That's off the coast violated all sorts of laws of propulsion and speed no not necessarily aliens it could be a drone it That's cool. that's that monumental where it just gets built all of them are like what the fuck yeah but brian There's no shit coming out of the back. on radar. They've got video of this thing. Gadelia looks different.

1:44:17 And then brings it here next time. The sport model? It's the right size. I got on the VIP list for the new Bronco. Yeah, boy. Oh, my goodness. I get so patriotic when it comes to cars. That's it. The roof comes off of that thing? Not for you, Brad. That's the four door. How dope is that? hold my cheddar cheese. I was in the UFC I want to know how many years it's been since she first got into the UFC.

1:46:44 I want that fucking car, man. I've never wanted a car in my life. Not for you. They nailed it. Yes, That's a stunning looking car. They nailed it. I want that fucking car, man. Okay, we got it. Damn, I like it. Klaude Gadeja's got the clinch on Angela Hill. What would you be yelling at? I'm trying to remember. Hill is athletic. i'm a fan i'm a fan oh big takedown by gadelia that's a black belt in jiu jitsu right there

1:48:36 That would be the thing. ends they stand up the next round she gets knocked out she'd be like oh my god she'd look back at What's next weekend? Nobody's broke. UFC 250 There's no way they're asking me for money Let's put it up No, no, that's free. Nope, give me $70. It's in three weeks? Yeah, that's free. kind of balls he has. I'm stoked about it. Jesus Christ.

1:50:57 And he's red on that. I don't care. called Ghost Wars Hell of a book about the Pakistani ISI, their CIA, and the CIA, and the war in Afghanistan 17 years. When people talk about the and dropped her wow he said it smelled like Maybe it was alcohol swabs. She's coming into her own, man. She looks phenomenal. Her feints are fantastic. Don't say hands are down, though.

1:53:28 When you just hit a heavy bag That's the most ridiculous thing 25 minutes? in the third round. Three minutes? Eddie, do you remember when I did time for Hegan in Abu Dhabi? Mr. Gracie I don't remember that. It was like smooth. from 88 or some shit. On Hickson. He also was one of the first Jiu-Jitsu guys who went and trained with Greco guys, Sambo Everyone's like, sir.

1:56:28 on another level, such another level Who have you rolled with that was astonishing in their technique? The most I've done with Jean-Jacques is I swept him twice within 20 years. the next guy after that yeah man there's levels No, but just look at the numbers. they're not paying attention half the time. Than the current judges No we wouldn't I mean, I'm happy for Ige.

1:58:58 First time back. Did you have fun doing it? It's a different thing for me. You guys, My point is that fight I felt very, very fortunate. I felt fortunate to be being there, I felt- It was a twilight zone. He goes, I'm sorry. Yeah. How badass is Anthony Smith? He looks younger than me She hasn't been doing it that long, man. All she needs to do is put her head.

2:01:11 Yeah. She needs to keep doing good fundamentals of footwork. Her fucking Instagram and her Twitter, her social media. Stevens, Dominic Cruz, Gus Finn, Phil Davis. You know the crazy thing all of a sudden, I never paid attention to him. Exactly. But also just take credit for it. attention and you're like how long what kind of education do you need to see to figure out that

2:03:13 to imitate people is Dude, horrible impressions. And he goes, what a warrior he is. because of that fight. He fought It was 51-0, yeah? What? What the fuck is wrong with you? That's crazy. Those highlights are... Brian's usually right though. He does pay Listen, I don't think you can, you know, you'd have to watch that in silence and not talk I don't remember

2:05:51 fight companions. That's what you're someone tomorrow think? And I'm like, crazy. We're someone tomorrow? Dude, that Claudia fight. What do you think? There's a black lady. are driving me insane. well but those are the numbers you can't you also can't go based off numbers we're barely I'm not right-wing. and more than two. republican democrats because it's teams listen joe and i were talking the other day about and

2:08:10 all our ideas or or somebody's idea wins the day you're talking logic and there's no ideas that we don't shut schools down, and corona doesn't kill kids, and we shut schools down? Should the teachers stay away from their old parents? Because you have all these people get together, Yes, exactly. Yes. This is when Hitler took over Germany. Well, the worst shit of all time.

2:10:24 We have to figure out what it is. It was like, this is why everyone's doing bad. Yes. Do you even read? could ever imagine. You look into that shit. hitler i'm just saying there is you got to say i don't want to argue about this or have a debate May 23rd event will move to and giving people a bag that has and no one can control it, I think comedy's going to come back.

2:13:10 I think it seats how many? Is it 200 or 250? Sold 900 tickets already It's like The Corona jokes you guys got, everybody's going to have an hour of Corona. Everyone's going to have their own experience. Daughter, right? What happened? and then they they showed this horrible story they showed him a picture they go we found this body I won't watch it.

2:15:48 I can't take it. I would just start crying. He had four dollars in his pocket If anyone's getting Corona, it's that kid. That was so bad, Brendan. This is his first fight back after having his lip literally split in half by Rosenstreich. 1999, two of his first fights. Paul Hordikji. This is all his kickboxing record. He's had some real badass fights.

2:18:38 do you see vitor belforce fighting that juicy dude well first team all juicy? Yes. Who? Yes. Who? That's the old days. Answers no. Who is it? And he's, you know, 240 pounds, whatever the fuck he weighs. Dude, what a picture. Don't even say it. I will say this. He went to Taiwan. Back it up. Watch this wheel kick. He'll try it. he's the juiciest and then finished him off

2:21:01 who stuck with it He's one of the best of all time. Is that basically? Ngalani. 5'11 heavyweight? Acai? It doesn't take Inspector Clouseau to fucking figure out that one. Basically the same thing. Walt Harris just cracked him. You gotta fight back. He's surviving. Holy shit. Oh my goodness. remember the Uber knees? Oren can grapple now. Oh, shit. Oh, shit.

2:24:44 Yeah. He's been KO'd. He was at the peak. one guy who fought Lesnar In 2001, Yeah, he was trouble in the street. 2001. They had a show called Too Hot to Handle. No, please. Let's just watch the fight. Walt's fine. It's very possible. Dude, I'm telling you. His knees are the best Well you know I don't want to make excuses Oh, your intestines removed?

2:27:59 stardom, man. Walt came at him And I'm not saying these guys should juice. Walt was a serious basketball player. they have a different kind of What happened with Johnny Morton? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Incredibly lucky to be alive, yeah. Hey, Eddie, what do you do here when you're in this situation?

2:30:39 Eddie, do you remember this? This was the that was when they're gonna stop this fight Unless he submits them. Stopped it. but the reality is before the fight, he said, don't fucking stop He's still one of the best, man. That uppercut. They're just talking right now. That's what it was like. are with Tony, and you said, listen, we want to do With all due respect.

2:33:38 Everybody got dealt with. You got a lot of power. No, no. Let him get his nut off and come back and go back to camp. Dude, didn't your boy Kelvin just get busted? He's entertaining us. lost his fight yes what'd he say he's you know anthony smith's house got robbed yeah he goes He erased it. But then again, that's how all of them are, man. time. We don't need this, Jim.

2:35:57 I want Nick Jonas to replace him. Where he's dancing. I wish I could do this. There's people like that everywhere. Put his lips out like that? I'm not trying to accuse Tommy Lee of sexual harassment. in a fucking bell box. Eyeliner. This shirt. No, dude. Can you imagine a girl The court would just Look at this. Yeah, Kevin Randleman died a while ago.

2:37:21 I never saw it live, but the the photographs online he's opening his arm But, Are we done with the fighters? Listen, realistically, do you think that California is going to be able to spring back to the I'm going to get louder. You want to keep this locked down I don't care And the only way to not get them to be upset at you is to not insult their opinions and instead to present your own

2:39:40 in confirmation. I'll tell you exactly what I'm focused on. You're taking complex issues with a lot of nuance and you're breaking them down to these binary positions. Go for it. if you're like, I don't. No, no, this is why. that we win the house it's important that we the supreme court it's all and you hear this mantra This guy's a lunatic. I told you Michelangelo's quote.

2:42:09 we are responsible for the people that are learning right now we're all a group we're all discourse. And two, you've got power. but that takes a strong Your ideas are not you. I'm wrong all the time. I was hoping and praying rods were real. Republicans. They're not But what we're finding out is,'s uh when it comes to corruption and when democrat and republican if you look at it

2:44:52 Like, I'm not into that. That's fucking amazing. He leaves the show in Vegas. I'm horrible with my voice. It's in the brain. Have you done Tyson's? I got that down. That's the only guy I got. I can't do it. We never discussed. They're just smoking weed. Action Bronson, right? Did you do it? clip of the right hand. Yeah, this is the fight we missed.

2:47:55 That didn't look legit. I'm six whiskey doubles deep. Didn't he come out of it though? Stupid shit. Is that his dance? That's so crazy No high fives, no fist bumps, no spitting. Stallone and Wesley Snipes. When Ryan Reynolds Oh my God. Well, it does kill some young people. Really? But we didn't know that. Do you think there's a chance that there's some nefarious shit going on?

2:50:37 That's exactly what I think it is. promoting wearing face masks. If I ever thought I had it, What? Look at the odds go Let me stop you There's fucking shooters through a tunnel. 80% of the people at the airports are wearing them. My daughter's feeling a little homesick. Those Navy SEALs. No, I know you were tested. It's interesting because the first time it was rough.

2:53:32 I don't know. And you roll with it. Dude it's spectacular She was like Relax Jet lag. As soon as I land Sunday, I'd have someone give me IV drip. I forgot how bad it was until this last weekend when I went to Jacksonville. I told you. with Dr. Neil Reardon, What kind of stem cell did you get done? You got it done in Mexico, Eddie? And I think maybe I came back to jujitsu a little too soon.

2:56:12 and they do the same thing I stayed there for a week. So it was just, it's just going to be tender no matter what. He was green in the game. Check this out. sons. But I haven't drove stick shift Rich white people. Why why you gotta get racist so I'm like, they know how to play pool. A 1998 NSX You wanted to beat me up. when you put that and this motherfucker

2:59:04 his knee he was so. Dude, his knee. I was having a hard time. he pulls over and he goes okay fucking pull it out it out. I'm like, not right now. I finally convinced him. this is gonna be a cartoon for sure I'm like listen pussy I got brain damage We made a beat ride. Well, I take octopers off. He had a fucking hot fudge sundae. definitely not how i said it but it wasn't the first time it was the first time in like

3:01:51 He's on the Channel 4 show. He started with you at Brown Belt. strip club DJ oh shit and you hold on when you would do those yelled tigers fucking uh how many times have i yelled that no i don't even know how to do my Bro, I haven't been stressed out at all. The stress that I got was in the beginning when I was worried that we might not survive But as far as like the not being able to do stand-up, I just have accepted it. I just took it in.

3:04:01 But there's a certain wouldn't it be nice if you had better information when you were going through your 20s and 30s doctor that specializes in some shit and you know people are lying unless that's happening we had real They're like, you don't understand. if they shut the country down for two weeks? Dana White and Frank Fertitta. No one goes anywhere.

3:06:50 Not always. health and the happiness of the individuals that are enjoying that prosperity inside the country in real time right and then what we have is the luxury of looking back at their mistakes yes and And we need to have a real economist look at it. uh ask me questions i think it was but dude it was it was great it was like But, dude, it was like Mike Tyson sparring with babies.

3:09:13 Because it takes thought, and it takes consideration of all different sides, and it takes time. That's a good expression. and their cult is the ideology it's not fair and when you act in a not fair way it makes all of us suspicious of your intentions But here they are in 2020. and then all of a sudden they get to the end of the cliff, It's just opinion after opinion.

3:11:32 you know for the truth. Which one? I didn't understand that. That's how drunk and high I am. I live a block away. She didn't make enough money. Yeah, that was really close. Dude, it's a hard road for any human being. This is what the Jon Jones thing is. Do you remember when he got into heavy lifting? Skinny legs. some sort of a cartoon He's so good at kicking.

3:14:25 It'll break your heart. That's a good answer. If you're not smart You know And the pressures But he was just so honest about it. I think it's literally like there's a certain amount of stressor your body can take. Kept training. Yeah, he's so thick. Middleweight champion of the world. like, hey, hey, hey, let's clear the hallway. You drink a whole bottle, a bunch of warm water with some salt.

3:17:27 And I was like, I'm losing so much weight. Your asshole just goes wee. Apparently. My doctor had some fucking bratwurst fingers too, man. What did he say to you afterwards? When you're 50, you get your prostate checked, Did he blackmail you? Come on dude I haven't finished it yet On a link Or dragons It's so outlandish. Bro, bro, bro. It's over. Remember that scene?

3:20:38 the baby dragon that's not this movie no the, the guy's holding it. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's like season two, you fuck. I didn't tell it well. he got fake tits for that yeah how about how about what why are you saying that how dare you calise More than Breaking Bad. The lawyer and who else? Dude, you're in quarantine. She killed her own husband. Mexican guy, scary.

3:22:39 Don't say a word. But Narco season one was right there with it. Dude, he was believable. Yeah, you're right. Oh, we are Nazi. You have aliens in it. We're watching Joe Namath right there. The night before the Super Bowl, he was drunk, apparently. We're watching Joe Namath right there. Come on now. Shut your mouth. Fuck, that's a great movie. Yeah, he's a genius.

3:25:05 They showed, but it didn't matter. He was like a regular. William Money was old. That's amazing. Is that true? Give me my fucking money back. Oh, dude It doesn't go back to the old school shit You've got to go deep It's just like, what the fuck are we doing? as tom hardy i know if if they don't put together it it's like don't matter dude imagine if that's

3:27:50 You had the chairman But what they have to understand that someone doesn't get to talk in the biggest It seems to be a subject that we should have people from both sides work on some sort of agreement for what you can and cannot say and why you can't say those things and penalize people accordingly and then have But they didn't anticipate the internet being privately owned.

3:29:15 by man This is some bullshit hater mentality. Major problems. And you had a bad view thing that can come out of this is that people understand that there's this is no logic real But if you know the government can shut you down like that, months and and then you've got a stimulus bill that doesn't have a fucking I would make the argument that those people are acting in fear when, look, if you're really truly concerned about your health, there's one of two things going on.

3:32:44 Or only people who are overweight? or only people who are alcoholics? Right. all owners of responsibility off of a particular group or a particular individual and the problem violent speech that's right i talked to pearson about that on my podcast preposterous ideas for Everybody is. Oh, that's woke? saying it's the same thing okay but what is woke though what do they believe in well they're social I'm saying you know how there's team freedom, right? Okay. Well, there's also team woke. Yeah

3:36:03 I'm not enjoying your white bullshit. We're also the longest standing democracy. They were already open. Shit's going to come rolling. Jamie sent me a picture Is Kat sent me this Dude. Players only love you when they're playing. That's how people are supposed to live. The people that don't want us to go back there, I get it. You can't make everybody depressed with you.

3:38:02 100%. God damn it. I don't know if I should That's huge. Are you kidding? for people that don't agree with you. Here, let me show you some pictures of my dog. Do you ever go back Never been hunting. I can hear him shivering. he goes in the morning His big lips. I'm not bullshitting And that we used Fritos And then it would dry out. talking about 50 50 earlier yeah i was ignorant i'm doing 50 50 no no no come on you gotta be

3:41:47 fuck off is a nice guy it's nice I go, so just look to the side. But it's not just fast What are you doing? Four hours in Throw you know the bus They're showing cornhole championships. It's too dangerous, dude. One person in the middle. do it bitch i did it twice i'm telling you i bet you have one numb nostril you've been punched a You know what's weird, man, when it hurts to eat?

3:44:43 I'm getting delicate too. Ever? That's never happened to me. You're too good.jitsu too, right? Fuck that. Where it hurts to eat. I'm getting delicate too. Yeah, baby. How's the lower back? And at first, the first couple months with my knee was weird. like new cracks would come up. I don't know what it is. It's making these weird noises. My shoulder feels great.

3:46:42 You're the best guy in Santa Monica, right? Is that this is an ever changing environment I'm with you, man. We've been doing NAD every week At the studio? No They do it in the green room. My body's only stuttered. Then you turn it down. It feels like your guts are on fire. Right, but how long was your IV? go open it up all the way so the nurse opened it up all the way i was like oh my god where it hurts

3:49:44 It's so tough. It feels terrible. And you terrible and you feel better here's what's crazy the moment it's over the And you've always said this. for granted but there was no river hot shower oh yeah we got in the river we got down in a It's really interesting. It's been awesome. Houston. For me, Houston is the first place I ever recorded an album And also that that was the club

3:52:06 Carla Bow, Jimmy Pineapple, all those guys that traveled around with Kinnison. It was so crazy. You watch one club went under it was so crazy you're going to have a tyrannical reign over that talent, Listen, I love all. Yeah, man. Do you want to live in Texas Californians moved to Texas They're right. a lot of Californians People are like, let us know

3:54:35 we could do that keeps me in And the store keeps me here. We could bring other people in. but worry about promoting comedy in this new place. The business model is we just want to break even. Engage the audience. I would do it a lot. Kids are cool everywhere, man. you what to do that's that's the problem that we're all experiencing right now and this is

3:57:13 Six feet apart. And then just outside is other tents of just regular homeless folk. They set up stations for that. and they have to be put into, But they just did in the past week, I think. Go find that homeless person five years later when their tent has a bunch of holes in it You hate us. I was worried yes what else is there to do The ethic is like setting up a place like the old Laugh Stop.

3:59:52 It was run by one crazy dude who was like part owner. Come on, man. If we just decided to do that, we could ignite a community. When is this over? 80% of the people at the airport, you didn't have to wear a face mask at the airport. said anything to me i sat the two next to a couple on the plane I ain't wearing no god damn diaper how everything just got

4:02:08 impressions are worse than him i'm pretty good dude they're gonna make us stand six feet apart devil he's gonna pull Come on. All right, listen. to do this, boys. Didn't spill any.