Joe Rogan Experience #2074 — Shane Gillis Transcript

Transcript

0:00 the Joe Rogan experience changes your day right You got to start taking vitamins. Pause. Oh, okay. Zinc is difficult to get into your bloodstream. I'm not, yeah, I'm not close to worrying about shit like that. I mean, this weekend I ate at Denny's and Waffle House. God damn, that's good. Especially when you're at— Waffles with butter and syrup are pretty fucking good.

2:44 They make, like, protein waffles that are if you find that. I think there's a company called Viking waffles. They make like protein waffles that are like low carb. And they're good. Yeah. We can't have these guys. Oh, they kill everybody. Alright, good. the old Conor McGregor woman. It's a little too Game of Thrones, you know? I think they were wearing like felt shirts.

4:40 Those are cosplaying. Do we have an accurate depiction of what they actually looked like? See it? Says the appearance of these infamous travelers, But what does it say? As for the male warrior caricature, Only one? What's a reverse mullet? Is that long up front? Party up front? What does that mean? What's a reverse mullet. Hmm. What's a reverse mullet?

6:54 What is a reverse mullet? The woman also wore a bonnet. That's it. Viking hairstyles. Yeah, I don't cheer for them. Yeah. Everybody hates Columbus. Who cares? They didn't give them enough gold. Yeah, I was just watching that Sean Connery interview yesterday. That's actually pretty good. Oh, you were just in Scotland. Like, who made this? It's like 50 feet in front.

9:57 That was big back then. Really? They're not really mountains. I got a picture of one. What's that, Jamie? What? It's like spores and amino acids were in asteroids. I didn't zoom in as much on this one. Oh, ooh, you need one. Big old stag No They're not educated about modern compound bows and modern broadheads. They die quick. No, I'm not. I don't have a brain that is allowed to sit still.

13:38 Let's just sit in this mud. Whatever it is. You have to understand how to use it. You're an awesome party van. I saw this video today of this guy was driving gory but it's just it's just like oh my god what the fuck do you do you can't do anything he didn't Dude, it's so... Oh, jeez. That was so many. Bro had nine years to break. Ba-ba-boom! Oh, from the spray.

17:17 But meanwhile, anybody who's coming after you is going to crash. That'd be so heavy The dog one is not Look at this To begin with done it different. Yeah He's probably like It happened in Australia That one just... Doesn't say anything else. It's empty. There's a guy, like, hang gliding.aroo, that's the greatest. There's a guy like No, he's just landing a parachute.

20:18 the balls that kangaroos have. Fucking get out of here. And they have to shoot them. They were dumb. Yeah, yeah. What, They had a pouch. They think they found. Yeah, they think they still exist, man That they actually What did they do? I'm sure you died trying. It's like a fucking house. Yeah, women got sent, too. Literally. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Scous them. The proper. Liverpool's great accent. Yeah.

24:14 He's a fun guy. ufc tony ferguson's fun tony ferguson's got some miles he's a fun guy he's got some miles on that and being prepared to do specific things. how he used to move versus now. just tripped on some wires backstage doing an interview It's like he's just walking along and he trips. There's only, there's a window of time where you can operate at the highest RPMs.

26:57 Yeah. Just this. I mean, that is a crazy photograph. Good Lord. The pause, the fucking. Yeah, they're going. Yeah. And these guys are just going for it. Longhorns. I'm delivered. Jamie would like that I feel like women Yeah, the other guy's high-fiving. He's so gay. But the weird thing is when they start dancing around him- Mr. Delivered. How many followers you got?

31:10 uh yeah he was gay then he should consider it. He is. True. But he was like, you can't say gypsy over there. He was like, well, they say they call each other gypsies. I can't wait. I'm going to be asleep, dude. Are you my favorite spot on earth. You going tonight? I can't wait. Really? What if my phone number got leaked? Yeah, well, for people in Europe,

33:57 I don't think I understand anything. Yeah. I don't know anything. And it was one of those- The black eyes with the dick? I saw the San Francisco Chronicle at the bottom. And yeah, Jeff Bezos hack. And it uploaded Pegasus software to his phone. Like, it's over. one way for you to hide the location you have to take your phone and you have to shut it off and

36:52 Yeah, but. going through a divorce or something like that, But once you start using your phone, they know where you are. And eventually you're going to use someone else's phone. i'm not getting on a plane with you again you're in trouble i assume they're gonna they're listening So thousands of people had access to that file and could have stolen it immediately.

38:43 Because you don't want to stop once you start. Yeah, if guys have little loads, they get sad. What the fuck are you saying? And he watches you whack on it. Try to find an orgy? And they were like, we're having an orgy at the Days Inn. He's in the lobby. He's like, I'm going to message them and be like, give me that fucking money back. It's like, dude, they just keep taking his money.

41:08 Somebody might have got him on a jacking off on FaceTime. Oh, Lemaire. He's told that story before. He lost his job. narrative is that the mainstream media is pushing this guy was all in with no questions asked On a fucking Zoom. and they're boxed into a very specific way like that guy went on the Patrick Bet-David podcast, you just see who they really are.

43:42 Yes. I heard he's a man. Chit chat. There's no question about it. Like, what is this? Kind of want to know but who can't I mean I'm kind of happy There's way too many people that unfairly associate gay people with some other kind of perversion as well. perversion for whatever unfortunate reason. then people are like, see? But there's just a lot of pedophilia and then whenever there's a pedophile that happens to be gay then people like see but there's just a lot of pedophiles yeah you know i mean that's the that's the

46:36 Although I think he got a little damaged. Mmm. Mary Kay You got to bang this old lady who's had 50 kids. Of what? in there forever. I'm just guessing. I'm just guessing. We have found. Listen, I feel bad for them. It did... who was across the street who didn't have a mask on he talked about it on the pot what no mask bill was all in on that nonsense he was but i swear to god it's in

49:51 There's a lot of people out there that are not on a good path, And I think there was more people that are already fucked up in these high population urban areas. and we were all talking about this. You feel like whatever the fuck is fucking with people in cities. You got to walk behind someone slow. I came that close to stop in the car You should have got him.

52:39 That's the thing. There's like a two out of ten possibility that you're gonna kill them that would get you some respect in prison though That's what I heard. Yeah, it's not that bad here, though. The plaza near the Italian sub I've ever had You Italians. God bless dude. Just grow forget about your diet this guy who says that forget about your diet Look at this.

55:22 He was about to fuck. Great people, though. Yeah. It is fun to see deer. They're always around the house, and they're fucking dirty. actually shoot more deer because they're trying to lower the population so that there's less of This guy is one of the best bow hunters on earth. The ladies want a party In the middle of the woods He probably fucked like 30 does that day.

58:45 And then she said, I was just like. Like that's how much it affects the brain and they only get to fuck once a year so imagine He's like huh? That is wild dude Also, that's a little deer. You don't really want to shoot that. called a button buck. What a button buck is, they're barely, they're so young, they barely You saw me in that. That's the blue cube, the one we have in the studio, that's the roughest one.

1:01:27 They can't shut the fuck up. I've been those people. It's a problem. And it was like, no, fuck this, I'm never doing it. The first time you did it was rough, but now you're pretty accustomed to it. I enjoy being done with it. You can be happy every day. I'll come over. Yeah. And then you're like, okay, it's six, the show's at eight, fuck. Yeah. They'll help.

1:04:22 I'm like, I don't think it's- He's awesome, though. So crazy. Well, that was taught to read it and write it when he was a kid and he can recite Now I know. I wish I had more. I get hit in the head too many times. But the thing is, you're going to get toxo. There's a disproportionate number of motorcycle victims, motorcycle crash victims. come from third world countries and poorer countries.

1:07:21 made Napoleon like a human. Well, Joaquin Phoenix did it made him like a human being like he says but every time they cut to He's like, it's pretty great. Yeah. I wonder why. He's like, funny how human they look when they fuck. Why? It's an interesting fact. Yeah. I liked the dude in the beginning of Chimp Empire. I know you guys are going to make fun of me when we get back.

1:09:51 I wonder if chimps ever do that. Troop? A troop of chimps? I was trying to find the next scene. A tribe Yeah, this group is called a shrewdness. Baboons are a troop. Wow, a shrewdness. Baboons are a troop. Oh, It's so funny. See what I'm saying? Get the fuck out of there, kid. The child's coming to look. He's going to get under there. Child's going to tickle his balls. Nice and slow. Get the fuck out of there, kid.

1:12:14 That's a baby chimp. So, these baboons... That's not the one I was you push. I mean, that's... So these baboons... And so this troop, I I guess of baboons for Yeah, but a lot of it is based on what happened in World War I. What was World War I over? I tried to kill him, didn't. Germany was like, we're going to help Austria. Montenegro, was it? fucking name he's very important the guy who shot mmm I don't remember his name

1:15:37 Like millions of people died. Got him. Imagine. Like, imagine being the CEO of Bud Light. What was she, like, marketing? It's World War I. Nobody figured out Kid Rock shooting your product. They were doing cavalry charges into machine guns. He looks like Scott Eastwood. And that motherfucker started it all off. Clearly. That's awesome. and there's 30 wolves tearing your friend apart, and there's nothing he could do. You jump up, dog eats you. And there's 30 wolves tearing your friend apart

1:18:36 probably the worst. They had like shoes that you would wear if you're like walking down the street. There's no waterproofing. The guys that went They didn't even have Imagine that life. That photo you just had of those guys. what the fuck are we here for? Yes. It's amazing. I always say I'm going to do it when I'm sitting in front of the TV. Yeah. Everybody's all bullet holes and patched together. Oh, wow. So he was his work? Yeah. Oh, my God. Everybody's all bullet holes and patched together.

1:21:22 but you got to look at Goya. Goya. Some Satan shit. Like they just got giant fans and they're spraying deadly gas towards you? Birth of Saturn's son painting. It's a different one? Yeah. That's not the real one. It's a different one? Keep going. Look at that. Oh, that's... You say it's called Official Name of Death? Oh, you had a Goya? Those brick phones were the shit back then.

1:23:50 Imagine wanting that in your house. I'm like, what are you doing? and I was at it, and they have what's called his dark paintings He lost his mind. Yeah. Yeah. and they're now in that museum. Imagine walking into that house. No, no, no. They were killing civilians. You see these horrible, horrible things. naturally afraid of snakes yeah yeah yeah unless it's built in unless you're a fucking psycho

1:27:13 Until he was just a really good painter. I mean, Goya's, a message spain's fucked up spain's always been fucked up spanish civil war is cool what about so that as you're on your way Sorry. The Gladiator War. They killed 6,000 people. Damn. 70 gladiators broke out from the gladiator it. Wow. They killed 6,000 people. the consular command. This army of slaves roamed across Italy, raiding estates and towns with

1:30:17 And then they get out. Yeah, just bullshit. That motherfucker Spartacus got out? And they fight with swords. Imagine, though, if the winner got $100 million. but this is different they're wearing armor like fake the sword Is it just- Well, it seems like they're clinching, though. So he can really kick hard. It's pretty wild They go to the ground Let go of the sword.

1:33:24 Looked it happened before. Statistically, there's a guy listening to this right now Fencing is just the gentleman's way are better than swords it's way better so it's way better. That's what held back the Japanese. No. Samurais fought them off. Different styles of karate. You seen that one that we have? I got a piss. I bet he ran. Oh, I can't even say all that shit.

1:36:34 And Yasuke, I think is his name, came over from a group from Italy, actually, The Padres came with him and thanked Lord Nobunaga describes how Nobunaga, he took him around Japan What the fuck were we just talking about before this? Napoleon Yeah I was sitting next to somebody that was describing the benefits of polyamory. Matches in preparation for Thursday's U.S. WNT friendly versus Russia.

1:39:39 But regardless. Did you watch their act? So he was like, polyamory. It's who's better at their job. no you tell me and then i i was like i'm sure they've scrimmaged at some point i googled it there's not a male taylor swift but there's women out there that'll say that about male I don't think anyone comes close. Both of them. Two shows a night, Tuesday

1:42:50 No, no. Oh my God, he did. He does rule. But you push that dude in a corner, I bet he comes out swinging. I think he's in Japan. They just sold But that is a rough look for Adidas. Fuck, dude. Do you remember that time he sat down in the Oval Office with Trump and he was just rattling off like craziness? Yeah. You're such a fucking hoe. Then they did it live on SNL.

1:45:47 Do you know the story behind it? Yeah, with him and Drake? He just ruined the whole track. Guess who's going to jail tonight? Fuck yeah. That's what makes him so brilliant. It was my old set, keep it going it no problem let's do it okay build a womb and so that was the plan and then jamie got covered Red band came in, keeping me out of there. contact with people. Yeah.

1:48:26 They didn't give a fuck. Wow. Not for a couple days. I got my energy back. We started making out again. And I said Kettlebells and playing yay No, this is Jay-Z, yeah. I don't know the full story, but. That's a good point. Culturally? I don't want to sound too gay. Yeah, let's go. Can I talk my shit again? He's in jail currently. Real talk came on in the fucking gym and we were dancing

1:52:15 Is it bitch? We can. Get the fuck out of here. All Midwest. Yeah, Gary and Deanna is Pryor. Yakima, Washington. Maybe you guys are awesome. That's why I thought that. Okay. Where were you born? Your parents lived in fucking Harrisburg A lot of people left Makes sense. Mechanics were going to the mat, dude. And we were talking. It doesn't make sense in any way

1:56:22 Oh, Dick Gregory. Geraldo Rivera show. having it like yo one of us got the tower seven collapse got something to show you oh my god, he's got a guy in there going like this I think people put them out there purposely. Yeah Yeah to make other conspiracy theories seem stupid and it can give you enough Yeah, they don't believe in space. What do they think galaxies are?

1:58:42 And then the earth is flat. There's a real problem with that. We have super good photos of Mars. Occasionally a kid comes out. You're like, oh, that's done. Like, you'd be fucking hit by lightning, you'd be like, oh, my God. Just the finger of the god. Struck by lightning? But he was a kid. Like quite a few people live, but quite a few people don't.

2:02:08 Yeah It was God jizzing on the earth? So they probably would see rain come down and they realize that all these things would grow out of the rain But he became agnostic as he started studying theology. He traced it back to the roots of an ancient Sumerian word, which meant a mushroom covered in God's semen. Fuck that was definitely come yeah, it's God's come

2:04:55 It's like, this is what you're scared of. Being connected to the God source. Literally. Just for the record. I'm God. two brothers? Or the father and the son? Forever. Yeah, no more. Love no more Eden no more beautiful perfect world cuz one person ate an apple What is he doing here? Clearly, that's probably, if that really did happen, clearly schizophrenia, right?

2:07:30 Wild times man Damn. But when you have these religious doctrines. I like the Mormons. They're good bros No. And you're really charismatic Tuberculosis. Oh, it's great. You've never seen the Outlaw Josie Wales? You're going to be sad. Look away. Look away. Dixie man. So he was a Confederate soldier, and they were after him. one dollar a bottle it works wonders on wounds one isn on just about everything, huh? They can do most anything.

2:11:10 And these robbers came up, and he shot these dudes. I say that at the end of, imagine that was a thing that meant you kick someone's ass lick them we'll lick them Yeah. Fuck him. Bro. I don't believe you. Don't provoke that guy. Oh that's the guy? We were trying to figure out who he was So I was thinking, why isn't anybody doing anything to stop this madman who just assaulted the heavyweight champ

2:14:11 I almost had a heart attack, LOL. It was a bad period in his life. He said Navratilova is the greatest, not Serena. We also spent time together at the New Jersey block. This is also random. But he's a journalist. No, he was just in the room. It says, writer lost his head seeing Tyson's antics. Exactly. Yeah. in the middle of a brawl and you're gonna going to taunt him? Yeah. Put him in a straitjacket.

2:17:19 So he's still out there. Look at that. Put him in a straitjacket. It was pure. Imagine wearing that fedora and saying that to Mike Tyson. He's grabbing his dick. Imagine everyone already saw it. He wasn't just biting Lennox Lewis in the thigh. I was too young for all of his, everything he did. That's what he does. And they're like, If they have a British accent.

2:19:43 You hear that accent. That, this is- He's like, you gotta pull this out of the fire. Yeah. That's it. Check out your team in Birmingham when they watch you win. I mean, those guys Powerful power walk. After he just won it. that he was losing and then say He beats the best pound for pound fighter in the world becomes the UFC welterweight champ in a fight. He was losing

2:22:25 Bro, when he head kicked. I mean, come on, man. Like his fucking spirit transcends. It's 101. This is the one. It's one-on-one. Listen, listen. I fall down the same rabbit hole every time I watch UFC. When Nate starts hitting him. He was doing, like, spinning elbows to the head. Watch. after that punch that he could have got KO'd. I mean Nate always has the wildest cardio

2:26:21 Oh my god dude Look, this is Frank Shamrock. Like does triathlons for funsies. And he didn't give up. Force where he was fucking up everybody. Like Nick had a fucking nasty guard. Constantly. of the guard like Nick And the problem was the audience was just quite a bit smaller. This is Scott Smith. He knocked one of my friends out. So he had the Gomi fight.

2:30:36 That's not good. I think it was Takanori Gomi that he submitted. He would just put it on them. No, you gotta go a little bit here. So here, Nick is Because this fight, this was Pride. Well, we should probably wrap this up anyway. give or take we've reached All your shit Gillian Keeves available on was on patreon. It's on YouTube. It's on everywhere. Yeah, you find it