Joe Rogan Experience #238 — Kevin Pereira Transcript

Transcript

0:00 You know, I'm experienced. Brian, are we for sure on the right channel? No. I've heard of it. But some of them, man, you get a hold of them and you go, okay, what's this? And if you're drunk on wine, you're drunk on beer, in a shitty Mexican restaurant somewhere. Yeah, but statistically. inject something into their system swallow something that tastes awful and all just to

2:48 Yeah. you motherfucker. I never get called for them, Right. And they mute their QVC and take another Werther's Original and take a poll. What? that my call is going to lead to feedback i don't actually take the survey but i go out of my way to You know when those cars are in the malls? I knew somebody that did that for a living. It's worth thousands and thousands of people's information.

5:36 That's a done deal. cadillac ctsv showcased in a mall and you can win that. I gotta think Cadillac is paying for that. or something like that. But the pro tip is when you in Battlefield. in all those bowls Why do you have a stack That's what's important. tied up in a bank account we just need ten thousand dollars and a little info from you to life they like make them go out of their way to do crazy shit to release the money yeah oh yeah

8:15 I mean, they must- Enough to make it worth doing time and time again and still do it in this day and age. And you can buy, there's a real money But some gamers don't want to spend the time And there's entire warehouses, cyber cafes, you name it, full operations where people Children have died. whatever it is where we can get addicted Like, on autopilot you're really only commanding 20 at any given time when you decide to do something out of

11:23 If you're doing the commute every day, hour and a half to the office. I was like, this can't be real. installed, and now we're going to charge you every You're paying tolls all over the place. Like, that is corruption at its finest. Right. And it's, to grope us. they did a couple pilot programs to like it was You've got weird baggies that show up on our scans taped to your ball sack.

13:53 wait a minute, where the fuck, how'd that get there? how do you say your name that's the meth addict cousin of jk rowling yeah that one yeah harry Well, that's what I mean. No, watching... I need to stop this. Erowid for math? Is there like a first times down yeah is that what it is i was saying that the other day but i wasn't sure is it there's a He just had mad munchies, man.

16:28 but I wouldn't do that. about eating a dude's face. But, I mean, there's drugs it's me, Mark. as you chew his eyeballs out. I've been so high you were just closing your eyes and fantasizing. Arrowhead is, you know, did you have you used arrowhead to figure out something like you're going to take and how it's where you can get away with more it It's just so gross how fucking stomped

18:39 of it and locked in a cage It's slavery. And then they have an alcohol lane. People have done it all the time. do. It's so crazy. before there's actual change? version of a sativ drug but they will not take the the one that the government has told them is It's just the things that become obvious, like meth. and I started running every morning. You got bloodshot eyes and yeah,

21:57 You bring your own brown box to CVS. Enough people have done that to where I have to prove that I'm not going to make meth with an over-the-counter product. You have people have done that. Isn't that amazing? To where I have to prove that I'm not going to make a meth with an over-the-counter product. what you think about this area. like small, It's an epidemic.

23:24 Did you ever watch a Cheech and Chong movie? You deal with meth people, you deal with violence and craziness. Yeah, yeah. just like this were saying on his neck And I don't want to bring race into it, but I have to. That's nothing in your job tolerated by any person who's a member of Just decided to step on him. I bet he's never been humbled in a gym.

26:40 Probably not. or he should be fired. not a good one. and they're asked to perform in these crazy situations They're treated like shit. They get bummed out about it. You need cops and you need guns, period. here's suspended with pay, It's so wrong It's all numbers How dare we? Yeah. We got to have a lot. None of the negativity that you saw in that video.

30:41 as those police sirens were coming by. because you've triggered the key word yeah sativa hello that's all weird it's gonna happen florida's And that is exactly like if you believe in smart dust, You're doing it. I'm on it, bro. Privatized prisons I think it is manipulate the whole libor scandal that is beyond me right now what is that the london interbank

33:13 Tons of markets trade on it. in a day, they could bet against the Libor number going up or going down. There's emails that show that it's been going on for like 12 to 15 years years but there's some people that are saying it might have been going on in the early Like a $100 million fine or $300 million fine. over the course of 15 years became a part of an investigation

35:12 Was it Yasmin? They do that to most doctors anyways. it didn't sway me one way but that's tragic because i want to believe like dr drew was one Every time I've met him, I'm like, I want to believe you're real. Of course, there was massive amounts of weed talk. Yeah. And see if Dr. Drew is the same guy after a month of ayahuasca, ibogaine, eating pot brownies, mushrooms.

37:19 We'll see you on the other side. And he has to do it with the Octomom. It was really... That whole thing just makes me incredibly sad. casting couch is real as well. All that shit's Can you imagine if that really became something you really wanted to actually be next to? and anybody that happens to be snorkeling on by... Picks up Japanese chicks and fingerpags them in front of everybody.

39:37 It's so bizarre looking and that's apparently how they navigate they don't have eyes or nose or anything on the top. Alright, just waiting for this commercial. goes on a bush plane, wrestle this guy. No, I don't. I don't know why I'm not buying this. They don't have to breathe water? The way it licked it up, gotten so good and so easily edited that you

42:00 Cannot do it. You need to go to a doctor. This is going to freak you out. Yeah, that's clammy parkour right there. It was tough to call chicks cunts back then. clam. It was always a clam. So maybe they're really loving it. maybe they they don't come until you eat them let's let's go crazy that's the only way to get When was the last time guys got in arguments in a bar of,

44:23 Just fucked my shoulder up hardcore. but just destroyed my entire body over the course of that. Make sure your posture was right? I'm trying to get better so I can actually get into something that's more of a martial art. I don't think you can see shoulder exercise called a club is it still on the scapular plane you're doing like these things called shield casting and all

46:45 That's all that is. Those big ones, that's like strongman type shit. I wouldn't say they were ladyboys man you're like, wait a minute. I want to know. That's not fair. So most people assume, especially for certain body types, certain body types, it's impossible. We're a slight combination. Well, for sure you went too hard too quick. You've got to make sure you do the power exercises.

49:56 I used to set up a tub. dip it in the margarine, then dip that in the mashed potatoes and gravy Beefcake. So now I have something to compare it to. but I was like I need to change this and lost a shit ton of weight Mostly. by the way, It's become, really want to work out you will fucking work out at home make yourself work out at home for one Well, how about the creepiness where they actually take the money out of your account every month?

52:57 I'll just let it go. so you can do handstand push-ups. You can find a bench. If you can hear this podcast, you can find a wall and there's chairs in the world you can find a bench we've talked about it I'm in pretty good shape It's like because the first one is easy. i do my kickboxing workouts i have much more power in my legs. My ability is bodyweight squats. It's crazy

54:53 will strengthen your legs and regimen. Like I don't have enough command of my body see certain people get to a certain age and like you look at them and then you look at some jack Keep it working. want to be healthy i mean you should be able to do whatever the fuck you want to do but if you Sure. and years and years of programming you're hungrier some dudes love cutting wood man you know i

57:51 Because all those guys before then, they were all training. that now. If you're used to throwing That's crazy. When George Foreman was doing that, he was doing crazy shit. I'm saying I don't think he used that. What he accomplished was expected to win at all? Yes. Oh, he was. Right. He's tripping in the shallow end. Muhammad Ali fan and he didn't want to watch Muhammad Ali

1:00:13 and take punches until you got tired than be, you know, rope-a-dope strategy, And it was one of those brutal KOs where he hit Foreman or Foreman rather hit Frazier error? Yeah. No problem. All right, it's charging now. Foreman's a little bit tense-looking. He's bobbing and weaving and winging punches He hits you and just changes everything He would push guys off a lot.

1:02:50 Yeah. He's literally going to go in the air. Watch how hard he hits him when he gets up. He's literally Nice jab, too. There's that uppercut. He's being so smart. There went his first bike ride. Did you want to get up, son? I mean, how hard does that guy hit? Did you ever see the stoppage? He's got the whole crowd going, Ali, Boombay-yay, telling, like, Ali, kill him.

1:05:20 Moved around. this big crazy black dude walked around with German Shepherds Look at this. Is that from Ali's documentary? They didn't expect him. and he got knocked down a couple of times. and just wasn't the same George Foreman. And I remember reading about it and being a boxing fan going, wow, he's going to make a comeback. And he kept beating people.

1:07:37 it's incredible, you can find that he was in his 40s. He was a really good boxer. Because now you look at it and I go, okay, well, that's impressive again I like, you know what It's Showtime is? the K-1 organization after a while stopped kickboxing is like real real kickboxing i mean we got used to that pka karate shit in the 80s which Jerry Cooney had challenged for the title at one point in time.

1:10:07 Look at this. How tough is Jerry Cooney? Oh, step in. He didn't even need the follow-up. Yeah, his ground game is probably about like James Toney's. He's very thin. It's great to hit guys. Your brain has to keep that in mind. so they have to change their stance a little bit, That's my favorite shit to watch. And he fucks guys up that are like really high-level world champions,

1:14:04 and glory is a kickboxing organization which is more than I've ever used it in life to make sure I was using it right. And it deals with sort of near-futuristic societal issues that will come about three i'm tweeting it that's why i'm asking oh yeah uh like a three. I'm tweeting it. That's why I'm asking. Yeah, like a three mini series or three episodes, three mini series, I guess.

1:15:38 Which is stupid. Satin. Well, I guess we can kind of dip into one, which was the Google Glasses. you know there's there's even the notion of of children suing their parents over decreased uh and just didn't spend any time with his kids. Jesus. this symbiotic relationship to be that's just what life is and it's not going to be an intrusion it's just there's not going to

1:18:11 I need to join a country club or something. It's still brilliant. Fucking Spider-Man. and there's crazy high-end technology everywhere, and yet he's using Bing. to present a product like apple though and i don't think they have their presentation The kind you would find on my cock strap right now. Feel how soft the leather is. Apple's really great at that.

1:20:34 the surface yeah so no one can see it froze for all of those and then the cameraman zooms in like would you switch, at the company retreat. You son of a bitch. You got to talk about it. Yeah. It just looks boring. If the Note could do everything, but the iPad couldn't make calls, Do you have to have 4G to Skype or can you Skype to 3G? It's just converting your voice to packets and beaming it around the planet.

1:22:58 can. Does he have a Tumblr? Yeah, those plugs, those Tumblrs, it's like where people went when they got off of MySpace. The Facebook thing is crazy. People for years wanted a way to define the type of person that's Same with Axe body spray, though. real dracar no no it's like it's it's like the chill water he uses the knockoff cool water like Thank you, sir.

1:25:13 house too we're doing one i saw that wednesday night for folks who are interested it's picking like an old-school arcade or cosplay or, you know, Where are you going? But we'll fly out. we've thought about doing live podcasts before The idea is that so many people do live podcasts on stage, and you show up, and you just watch somebody talk, and that's it.

1:27:26 Which, you know, of it on YouTube. You know, to say no to no more questions. So the So I cut it way back. I think it would be cool if it was a show of only Q&A. was talking to people afterwards. You know, because you could have an awesome show, Well, if you did that, if you ate a dick on stage, I think that's quite a closer. What am I going to do with this thing?

1:29:41 He had his dick surgically removed. I think that's silly beyond belief. boys. I'm so glad they fixed it works. slipped it into a condom and on live television put it in a co-worker's asshole and fired up the That's hilarious. talk of the show, that I enjoyed kind of like watching the news almost every day. That's awesome. Lots. Supercreative.tv is our site.

1:32:27 Because I'm like, That's what we'll do. it's far enough along. was censorship wasn't a huge issue with attack of the show we were really able to get away with a And we all try to grab it. oh, now I just feel bad. and they ran a farm. They know what the fuck is going on when you come up to them with that gun. only thing that I think of when I think of

1:35:21 keep pigs, rather, as pets. I only feel connected to things I can think. much like the way they torture veal to make it. That's the propaganda. They just use the liver. You can glaze them You know, liver is really good for you. It's like, that's of all, organs are some of the most nutritious things you can eat. Liver is really good for you. That's the reason why

1:37:22 I'm not talking about the nutritional It's disgusting. so we're feeding them other cows. That's where they get it from initially. Yeah. open the chest and gone let's see if this powers it let's see what happens when we do this sure Was it Facts? No, Growing Pains is the one with Kirk Cameron, wasn't it? I never fucking explained that shit. like looking past his phone

1:40:56 did this like little smile He is just clenching his teeth and fighting off. It's so funny to me how the people who are most outspoken against homosexuality are just the closeted gays. What do you think about the Tom Cruise, Like, such an obviously staged picture. Like that's it. And Tom, okay, Get on there. what's your issue? to me i just love the helps help people though man no doubt about it i have a neighbor who's

1:43:36 Tom Cruise's life and he's one of the head guys. in the do you know the scientology video where he is uh it's a video that wasn't supposed to get it And cheering along with it and shit. Poor Katie Holmes. And guess what, man? that thing the old rice bucket rice why do i feel like there's a similar measuring device with rice Yeah, look at them all clapping.

1:46:04 a more tolerant, a more compassionate being outside Yep. about that one that was beautiful too though he's beautiful the way he's just so charismatic i would to do that. It is the time now. Now is the time. Stop it. What? by an accident I just love the them right now he's like a horse that knows he's on the end of the trail and he's getting back to the feed bag.

1:48:58 depending on us. It's so ridiculous. How crazy do you have to be to be wearing a medal? That we've been irradiating and saying mean things to for years. This is a slideshow Think about this real quick. in this photo. think he's gay and he doesn't want that because and my name is brian reichel and my stage name is red band and i i disagree with everyone here mr cruz and i'm sorry oh

1:52:23 it yeah but could you buy like jets and shit certainly you have unlimited wealth, though? I don't know. Just never having to worry about it. Yeah, but could you buy Jets and shit? I could have gotten unlimited wealth if I just got a better agent? they'll they'll let things happen looks maybe maybe i call it adventurous joe fuck you for And they go, look at this young gentleman here who's paying in and he's playing the game.

1:54:12 So that's why they control him. How much could they weasel you in? like a form of a talent agency. all different services. is that you divulge everything to them. Yeah. Did they get paid? He should just come out. The people that care suck. So now, the actual being gay. involving marriage or any other discrimination suit Sure. I mean, the main thing people say, well, it's a political issue.

1:57:34 It wasn't a big thing. But the Ronald hand out the pamphlets, Those sons of bitches. I can help you. You live in a future, a sexless future, where people take orgasm pills, a good steak. So we 600 horsepower car and just drive Okay? Yeah. Believing that doesn't make me feel like my plantar fasciitis is going to heal quicker. and the story was going to be fucking badass,

2:01:08 That's the calling. This fucking air conditioning sucks Does he want to come back right now? Seven? It's swampy. Sure. I mean, certainly. They're really attracted to blood. and just let them walk around new york yeah there it is it's on a fucking it's it's crazy man it's uh on a uh spear and And that's Oh, yeah. They found this rat in a shoe shop Jesus.

2:05:01 In New York City. I'd freak out if I see a spider the size of a dime Are they eating other giant rats that size? I didn't feel like cleaning the trap. Wow. Yeah. They're like looking around. there's a nuclear blast they're gonna run towards it just start fucking just eating the first thing so insane is that like they built this simulator where it's a zombie outbreak but just like the

2:07:44 pop out put him at gunpoint and they said we're gonna kill you unless you become And he really felt like he was one with the group after a few hours. Yeah, but in a matter of minutes in the virtual world. It's like Twitter in game form. eviscerate each other. It brings out the worst. I mean, Well, but they go, You know, But I have found that when people will tweet something negative to me, which is constantly,

2:10:16 once you kind of call them out on, don't know who they are so they lash out at you just because of that they see you on the shows How gay is that? I bet we get 100 tweets. That's a mistake. hardware that's in it yet like you couldn't download a driver for it first world fucking I was a coder for sure. So you worked at an ISP balancing packets? and you assign priorities to them,

2:13:09 there would be writing was actually You have mail. Okay. Okay, so you call. I'll do my Ticketmaster one. How can I help you? like if certain Amex cards get you early access For live events. $7 and it ended up costing $25. mostly. Who's fucking you then? It's all designed to maximize their profit and make it fucking impossible for you to make one as a small event in a big venue. And it needs to be disrupted.

2:16:19 charge much more. specifics i could get into like yeah yeah it's but what what do you think specifically should But don't you think that's because they can provide the acts to the venue? data or off of twitter right and then you say we're going to go to these things and you go on I think you can see what the demand is in an area first. That's an interesting idea.

2:18:34 Well, here's the thing. fuck yeah. is the big venues and nice places are all locked up. you have to go with a, Pearl Jam tried to stop that, right? you have to play by their rules right right right yeah it's wild hmm that's interesting and it's What is the convenience fee? Yeah. then they lock you out. that are trying to disrupt that space, ski you're gonna wear a bow tie be weird are you gonna like be a weird host i'm gonna put on that

2:22:14 and the cigarette holder he's our host i love how we're opening this year's tour i'm uh mike and films and stuff like that, We're doing that. And the documentary on them making that is brilliant. I guess I got to give it for some people. this is my childhood. It's a fake town. Whoa. Let's go into the zero. Do you remember it though? Fuck yeah. burgers and pizzas or they'll go to every fast food restaurant and get one of everything on the

2:25:53 So Harley came out at the first one and we interviewed him and then we brought, I don't do man versus food. It's always been shit. Oh my God. And then they're just crying Oh, the trunk of my car? No, no. That's where Grandpa used to. And we made a trip, five mile walk to a Dairy Queen with a c once yes it was my first week ever smoking pot and i we made a trip five mile walk to a dairy queen with a c because i decided an orio blizzard was our fucking

2:28:05 And yet I wouldn't eat at a restaurant if half the restaurants, Like they're like, You know, or your seed flew created DDT. that's the really scary shit. that they bought Yeah, They were sold because they face But they develop this relationship where these people, that's where they're getting their seeds from. every 30 seconds a farmer's committing suicide because of it and well in brazil brazil just

2:30:54 who's already got billions of dollars. I don't. Your dad's Portuguese? I don't. He is, yeah. I told you, he wears the bottle of Dr to get a fucking book on Portuguese. Do you speak? I don't. it. He's full on Portuguese and we'll shout it with bread rolls at his mouth. Anthony Bourdain went there. Was it proximity? There was whole towns where people talked Portuguese in Rhode Island.

2:32:20 Are you really in touch with your heritage and your roots and your ethnicities and all that jazz? Certainly. Then I would do the Spike shows. The fights are tomorrow night. Are you focusing that time on? that are really into the podcast So we owe them. Like, I fucking love it. Is it, is there a common thread that has surprised you at all? This is just how I live my life,

2:35:26 I think we all have, we've all done that. Like you want to be around him. and I'm going to fucking be the man. Or whatever it is. So your shit sucks. The only time I ever listen I like rock. Yeah, it sounds cool. Sure. I don't have the time. the creator of it. it anytime thank you man always a pleasure we'll figure out a lead-up thing. I actually should probably plug on supercreative.tv.

2:38:37 But we're doing flash mob beer parties at Comic-Con. It's going to get insane. Joe will be there Friday. Oh, that's right. And, yeah, and it's only $15, and we hang around afterwards, Brian has how many different podcasts you have over there now? It's just a great hang. He didn't know because he's in L.A. Trademarked. designs coming in. I've got a bunch of new things happening.

2:41:17 Thanks to the Fleshlight. Makers of Alpha Brain. Here's Adam vs. the Man, a very Go to Onnit.com.