Joe Rogan Experience #299 — Honey Honey Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Joe Rogan, experience. well it's weird that's how we started it yeah it's a good way to do it though i think you know Get down with that. who loves this shit why not just go shoot him straight I think he's a slow mover He talks like a normal guy But he's like he's just a think he's won it at least three if not four times he's six foot eleven oh my six foot eleven

3:00 Yeah, but aren't the big ones like the stupid ones? Nobody wants to think That bitch just got all aces. That must be tough. stealing something from her by existing by being in front of her she's not a sister she's not a you apparently she was very beautiful and the the bride was furious like it took away from her like dogs were we would just be peeing on each other all day yeah Yeah. And humping in public. On the regular.

5:34 And Larry Bird is great. Our very good friend of a friend found him on the freeway in Nashville. dog is he he's an australian shepherd oh okay i know what those look like mid-sized probably 45 like she was like starving to death when i found her, like literally in, in downtown LA, she was just eating out of garbage cans. Or you could grow up with a crazy fucking shithead mom and a nutty fucking violent abusive drug addict dad and you're fucked.

7:49 to support any of that but the idea that people are responsible especially like babies are Man. this is ridiculous he's like i want to spend my money on other things so he stopped using a cell phone for three months he didn't have a cell phone But it's so interesting. time would like to uh learn a few tips if anybody has any you want to be like a subsistence well i

10:18 If you're into that, if you're talking about people living off the land Oh, yeah. did you know that like professional fishermen yeah like you can make a great living if you're like a famous fisherman. I mean, you're in Nashville. you know, their receptive faculties is they know the the fucking water they know about the fish And he bites it and gets literally pulled out

12:28 surface they're just like ah you're really you're really ruining it for me now there goes my fishing I don't think people eat them that much. Did you like that band Heart? no disrespect to the Viagra pills and what have you, Super boner. I want to see how much boner I can have. Well, he mostly sleeps. about that you can't even can't even use it's real if you if you joke about rape you support

14:39 Yeah, that all of the Muslim characters are cartoonish. and were walking around, Like, wackadoos that are brown, any more sense than another ideology any of these fucking goofy cults make any sense. The hardcore lefty stance is a cult. because you're not going into an unarmed area. to discuss this topic um because we just moved to nashville and that's a gun town there's guns

17:41 the firearm population but like at the end of the day like with illegal guns so it's already this weird situation. Those are legitimate questions. people want to, It's just when something does happen, it's so horrible and so heart-wrenching, driving around in cars, getting stuck in traffic, You'd have to storm houses. They have them in case of extreme situations

20:55 There's definitely arguments on both sides. Do you know how many fucking kids get put on antidepressants at a young age? something fucking really wrong with him just to be able to do that just to be able to do you know what i mean like like you have to be blonde blue eyes you know and anyone else you This is such a difficult thing to talk about because it's a, it's horrific.

23:14 We're talking about all these things about at your fingertips. He's two houses down. and the ability to move along great distances is we don't live and work close. And then someone figured out cars, and it just stopped. we make that happen? which is awesome that's the way to do it i agree i think that'd be really cool but it's funny to if we were going to try to have a communal type thing again.

26:36 them and it's really possible that one could happen and if it did happen we would lose all Or every four years. survivors yep that's right so we're gonna have to come up with a game plan of um you know i'll Yeah, that's the problem. We accept that. we don't want to kill bad people. I don't know why this just started playing. I probably shouldn't even talk about this right now.

29:23 It says, I am Adam Lanza's mother. It's it's about this woman or excuse me this woman is talking about It's like how do you treat these kids if you don't really know what's going on, Is it nurture? they haven't washed in a year and they're nodding back and forth and having conversations like okay and his fucking noodle, Can you imagine? That's just straight.

31:58 Don't worry. I'm not an alcoholic, but I love bourbon. And look, drugs have torn into people. and I'm not going to throw him under the bus and barely keeping it together it does exist. you're never in this, but there's always and everybody wants to party with you yes but at the same time i i really um together i remember one time when we were really when we first started touring together ben got

35:03 you're both in it to make great music. That looks like it weighs like five pounds. I was very excited. Brian, do you think she's alive now? Because that was like 2005. If you had to guess, do you think she's alive now? That's good to know. My wig don't look nothing like that. You look like Bigfoot. That's a real tit, bro. making any jokes about trannies really even saying trannies yeah Wow. Do they have a term? What do you say then?

37:59 No, you didn't. Idea City played music which was kind of cool It was fun, only when I go back and watch the videos, We got to see him in Nashville. I love her. Adam Cohen, I'd like to see him Anyway, so... And does porn. With guys, and it really kind of messed me up And it was just so, it was like, you see the top frame, which is all, he looks like a lumberjack.

41:26 because he getting pounded by a dude look at him Brian added that song, by the way. mix. But yeah, that looks like a People didn't understand me. Okay, enough, Buck. All right, settle the fuck down. I'm using the wrong word. No, I don't understand. and they do not have the money to be happy. Curl it, whatever you want. Bam. Really shitty. transsexual man who became a woman

45:34 You know, isn't that possible? I'm sure people were bummed out. the ever-mentioned conference. videos and there is i think she has a book nina story oh my god what have you done and and it's Is it not Nina story? Audio clips, lyrics, concert schedule, photos, a style incorporating pop blues, funk, alternative Did you find it? and who wants to lose that but how are you gonna look like a chick if you still have a dick

48:14 I think if a woman, you know, if a man wants to be considered a woman, sorry nina story ninaie, we're so sorry. Oh, Jesus Christ. I thought she was very feminine. She didn't sit like a... Mrs. Rogan was there as well. It's like, Oh wait, well it tastes different they're a lot more salty they're fake ones come on come on what are you Can you do that?

50:54 And it was okay. Crazy. I mean, Buck Angel. song. I've never even done and you just spray it in your nose. No way. That is crazy. So it's in like a like a nose spray thing and you just spray it in your nose Let's take back our freedom. Suzanne to urinate. What's his thing? From there on, it's been a downhill slide to the point where, of feeling guilty every time i want to light up. Negative, one.

53:56 Hurry up and sit down. douchier commercial. It's for Stephen And I just found the smarter alternative. Blue E6. Blue lets me enjoy smoking without I don't like it. Look at him. Look at him. He's with the music, you fuck. Look at him. There's no reason for that. they're bad for me it's well i don't think electronic cigarettes but that was that was the cool guy on the beach

56:18 He's going to go write the great American novel. That's another thing. What if Buck Angel got pregnant? made me excited about march i can't wait now the end of the world can't come it's you know what i Well, I think the aliens are already here. What show? i could be totally wrong i've never seen the show but my friend was telling me about it and I thought that was funny.

58:15 Confuse the fuck out of everybody. Trust me. Let's make a new one. It's huge. If you had to be in the Get off me, man. And you can light up at a basketball game Buck Cherry. play all my memories of every chick that I dated until I was like 26 and throw them together with a Buck Cherry song, that crazy bitch song. You've done a great job of looking exactly like a dude.

1:00:51 fucking horsepower inside shrimp out joke We went to one in Cleveland this past year, like three months ago by default. i was like oh my god and i got pulled onto stage and I couldn't Total magic Mike on this motherfucker? You would be cool with that. It's all good. was into it but any horror i digress any more we were at the we were at the um the amateur wrestling

1:03:46 See, he looks like, Yeah, This is so bad. We didn't mean to paint her and I respect her very much. They were there! Did that feel good, though? That's your DNA crying out. Mrs. Rogan. Maybe just around town. two more of your friends? out there it happens honey honey what are you gonna play for us what do you want to do first I think so. Is that okay?

1:07:54 Won't take my eye off the ball again How come I end up where I started? How come I end up where I went wrong? Won't take my eye off the ball again Love it Oh really when it comes to doing a song together It's not going to suck. What did you think? I'm sorry. Oh, really? Do you think if we do that, we'll make millions of dollars, too? Are you getting more attention? Do you feel it?

1:12:05 When you do that, do you take It is a low because we're not touring. You're just creating new stuff? Yeah. but we still have a lot of work to do. Let me tell you something. whatever the case, is a really amazing feeling. But really, we're just writing. You know, who gets a chance to do that? Just kidding. What are you carrying a knife for? Exactly.

1:14:37 You know what? from the beginning oh Suzanne please stop sorry that's my giant horny redneck that sees you at I was telling Red Van earlier. I wanted to go pick up Ben across town. I go to the Ymca like four times Why not create I couldn't tell you and you're so smart You guys have been together for a long time. Nobody winds up getting pregnant. Well, yeah, because it's, you know, it's difficult in a lot of different ways because, you know,

1:18:24 Or you're with someone that you see every day there's like this like fine line do you ever do you ever date a guy no I wouldn't let me tell you you're trying to your freak on God, it's so funny. I've tried. What is your nationality? Kidding. drinks i'm i'm pretty warm i my voice my volume gets louder um you know i start taking clothes big sitting on the porch beer drinking community yeah it's like

1:21:31 It's not death metal. There's too many people. You know, it should take you one minute. Yeah. the pace was like a faster pace because everyone was doing things. No, but we talked about Piss Up a Rope last time we were here. You know what's the sad thing about cheese? to make cheese. You can get it in America. and I know they, Then they slip you badass fucking straight from the teat yeah sitting on the lap of an elderly man couple pubic hairs

1:24:36 No, not Cinnabon. Amos are pretty good yes chocolate chips I need some cookies On JoeRogan.net By tomorrow You know, you got to enter in all your nonsense. And the special is something that I paid for it entirely myself, Don't be playing that. You know, of course, certain people are going to steal it. Look at the quality. It's film-free. One, I think it's the best way to distribute things,

1:27:07 Unfortunately, you have to actually sit down with people or want to have a say or want to that you printed all those words. interfering with your creative process, you fucked you know you just are they that's not what they're supposed changed Ari's life and that's why we're releasing things online like this but if you want to get crazy, If you're one of those dudes who still believes in Santa, wait until tomorrow.

1:30:05 Yeah, no, I didn't fuck around. I hate getting emails from people like when the fuck Yeah, expensive clothes and driving... it's not like on the subways in New York, people will mingle. So no one's like on a train with a bunch of, you know, young kids. It was cool. I liked it. to do my special with a better name in space to live from a place the last one i ran out of my good names do you do once you release

1:32:53 I had a new website that just went live and a little bit more functional. on top of some crazy wave and we're like whoa what do we need to do we need four fucking rafts And now it's like 100%. I talked to a guy today who told me he listened to it five times already. I need to converse with this man. I've heard it before Is that Dirty Dancing? Hopefully Amazon's ready by today.

1:35:51 Honey, honey. Oh, shit. Everlast was second. What? And the people that contact us online love you guys. I don't know how it took place. thank you well speaking of i want to say that we have a show in cleveland my hometown in the area do you play for I feel like I'm testing you know oh Oh, no, but we should. We're honey, honey, And we think you're great.

1:38:48 The dude, whoever you are, that's made those CDs, cheesy shit. Try to find that one Yeah, how about that one? My point is Whoa. Five-hour boners. and stormed the airfields of Peleliu. He's a 28-year-old younger chick. how dare you easy like he would start He'd blast it like he was playing ACDC. They didn't really play that much. No? Get in the game

1:42:14 like Rosemary Clooney and Frank Sinatra Um, Oh God. Hold on. But there's But there's rock set. That's a good song. I remember actually, would sing Journey together? Yeah. I hope not, but yes. Of course he did. Elton John glasses. A lot of pot and a lot of quaaludes. guys would wear on a regular basis. raging hormones and it's this massive quest to figure

1:45:29 Well, that's what breeding is all about. Somebody touch me. Pants work. Everybody's cool with jeans. Most clothes and pants during the minor days, the cowboy days, They made more clothes with hemp and more flags and sails. that owned all the newspapers we also owned all these paper mills and the cover of popular science how marijuana was causing blacks and Mexicans to rape white women.

1:47:58 because DuPont had came up with a chemical composition But that's the only reason why it's still legal today. That's cute. You spend money to keep it illegal something they enjoy that doesn't hurt anybody else you spend And they're all trying to appease these fucking monsters that put them into position. and our willingness to go into wars. like the system is so interconnected there's hundreds of different organizations there's

1:51:52 And they try to work within the system to fix it, but that doesn't seem to be working. when the Romans did it. It's crazy when the Greeks did it. But it's even more crazy when we do it. It's embarrassing. We're crazy as shit. And you have these people, I don't know. this knee-jerk reaction that comes from a place of anger with a lot of people and i think that

1:55:00 because the way we live our lives takes up X amount of resource from, you know, hate for india They don't want to think that you do need a military. That's what the Romans did. That's what Genghis Khan did. but the reality is if you actually pay attention to the news there's a lot of non-kumbaya type And the only thing it could possibly help is that somebody maybe could listen to me and run for president and make some sense.

1:57:31 He'd freak out and have a heart attack. There's no point to this. because you've inherited something huge that's going to change everything. If there's an alien, I think the alien is the internet. It's an alien factor created by human beings it's alien to the earth it's alien to any of the systems that have been You lose all access to it. know that ultimate fighter star with the that broke his penis yes oh my god yes this is totally

2:00:27 Is that tendons? Is that muscle? Frothy. Can you imagine that? You know, I mean, a lot of girls would like to be on top. Yeah, she was she's like bouncing up What'd you do? Are you insane? He was just trying to pass by guard, and he slammed his knee into my dick, and I didn't It was bloody. You're always getting hurt. Please tell me that's not your jizz.

2:03:45 So I was like, So I was all right. A blood baby. Ryan what is that? But it was really weird After I broke my dick? that my dick worked. wear a glove And she's still doing orgies She's old. Did she? You know what? Oh, no. I just don't know if I want to play this song. Can we bring it down? Little girls. experiencing all these girl things and I want to be like what the fuck we're not

2:07:27 She's wicked smart. I mean, obviously, I love her to death. When you're, you know, when you could just, it's going to be hard times. have people in my life, not just one, a gang of these little people that i literally love more than i And my whole outlook on human beings. You're playing babies eating lemons. Oh, my God. Faces. Yeah, they make that face, and then they bite down and chew them.

2:10:22 They don't wipe their mouth off. I'm not sure if this is what we're going to call it. Not really, no. We have a chance to hear like so this is not even named yet not really no people on Ustream if you come up with He found the right name Bloody balls of steel. New Planetary Avengers. Got to take one more main ball away. And judging you. you run to the sea

2:13:30 Don't wait until you die. Oh, babe, so what you gonna do now? and we'll carry the weight Wow, that's badass. I can't play fiddle right now. It's a song that Ben wrote, and I think it's awesome. It sounds badass. It's like, Okay, hold on. Makes me sad, I don't About a rosary Give me hands to hold Oh, oh, oh, oh Could I ever ask for more? Get on my hands and knees

2:21:16 Dude, that was awesome. Fuck yeah, dude. Look at this. Sounds like a steak. I almost did. I seem to be more compatible with the men who want to be women mean are you asking me personally joke because i don't really know how to answer that question How dare you! Has a vagina. when I talk to them? out of a relationship? Larry Bird fucking loves Ben. who are fairly non-muscular and very boy-like.

2:24:07 He prepared that one in his shitty little mind for like an hour. Thursday night, Red Band will be at The Improv in Hollywood Yeah like I said The night before It's them. Do you have power pills? $14 margarita. Settle the fuck down. You know, if it wasn't for you guys, a guy on my message board sent me a message a personal message said this is going to be your

2:26:30 It's pretty awesome. I disagree very strongly. but I do want to have a little shout out Do you ever think those words would come out of your mouth? I walked in with Tate Fletcher, Like there's these people that were killers. Yeah, it's crazy. Can musicians be in your Desquad? That's cool. There's no death involved. Yes, you guys were 299. a knight. Joey Diaz's wife is about

2:29:30 come out of Joey. Joey Diaz, We appreciate the fuck out of that. I was supposed to not talk about it until tomorrow, and then it was a long time to set up the infrastructure to sell this was never even an option much as it's helping you guys i swear to god um i don't believe in god and i swear to him i swear God could be the guy And we'll see you tomorrow.