Joe Rogan Experience #379 — Matt Farah, Tod Mesirow Transcript

Transcript

0:00 We have two different parts of the podcast, like where Sirius picks it up. I try to have some sort of semblance of... I know it's stupid This arm right here We have the table mounted ones Once you start drilling 100-year-old wood, you know what I'm saying? the executive producer of my new TV show which is Joe Rogan questions everything Was I the Russian guy in the trunk?

1:47 and was being yourself. Seriousness. just letting you look at the car. And, yeah, Jeremy Clarkson. You made it to the final round. I don't do scripted stuff. I love that dude. Yeah. Richard Hammond and the other dude. You can see that age over the series. Just do a good car show. That's fucked up. The best part about We call that the lost episode. That Tanner Faust guy is really good.

5:08 Was that the thing down on the docks? I mean, after Gymkhana came out, Tanner wanted some of that action, too. So I was there when he did it, and he drifted the entire snake once. called the snake and this motherfucker's going sideways around corners. shitting your pants, sweating while you're Chris Harris? I don't think it is. Check this cat out. I'll be honest

7:56 Fucking race pace Would normally be. Come on your show and talk about Chris Harris. Thank you, man. a stuffy like stiff presenter right it's like they're they're being honest about what these They're trying to fuck with me. I got him in a lot of trouble, but I figure I can only get him in trouble for this story once so i can tell it again so there was a thing called the octane academy in

10:17 And I got Tanner blackout drunk on whiskey that night. And then I published a picture of him drunk and giving the finger on Facebook, and he Yeah, the only new Porsche that really wants you dead. That'd be fun to do. I was fucking psyched. He smells like he could be And he went out on the track on Streets of Willow. Yeah, man. But not totally. 100% disaster.

14:04 A Porsche Turbo out of the box does 184, It's a stroker motor, right? this is all, They're drooling. Yeah, yeah. What do you think about that? Exactly. The old style of like ancient suspension, ancient brakes. They want those old brakes. I want the shit that works. that bought a 65 Corvette. It's crazy. Yeah, I have. Manny Carson to the Christmas car.

17:25 DeLorean with when there was that famous case. But he got off, right? So he has the entire DeLorean factory's worth of parts. Yeah, dude. For 56 grand, they'll build you a Right, right, right. Same engine, but they're hot rodding it up a bit. The stage two upgrade. Yeah. Yeah. Now I sit in fucking traffic all day. Every now and then. Hell, yes. took me to fucking preschool in.

20:56 It's like, it's really strange how it missed. Like they never totally get it. What is a front wheel? It looks like a spaceship fuselage. There it is. Oh, my God. The geodesic dome. Buckminster Fullerene? Oh, yeah. When they started showing it, I was watching this thing on sunflower seeds. Me neither. That's it. Like the size of the grill versus how high the nose of the car is off the ground.

24:05 They're like modern works of art that you drive. He was on the podcast out of his car any issues with mine. with hand-built stuff, man. Exactly. Engine had to be replaced. the fucking right now for like It's a very good car. they love that why is that Yeah, if you're 911s. It's true. Why not? The Z01. ding. That's it. No radio, no bullshit. And it's like 3,000, 3,200 pounds and fucking 500 horsepower

27:16 That's the Z28. Why did they... Oh, yeah. My car is loud. Are you saying that 800 miles a year I drive in that car contributes to global warming? In five years, they'll have some new technology churn it up and use it as fuel. lead and fuel. Diesel trucks. to fuel out. If you're downvoted as a YouTube commenter, you have to row. But there's a lot of people.

29:48 You were talking to Carlin about this. Never do anything. Unfortunately, they they'd be the most timid. Will he respond? Will he respond? Never do anything. And anyone who's a fun guy can easily be criticized. The idea of everybody getting a say in what is good and what is bad is a new thing. to do the Opie and Anthony show. You want to bring me as your date?

31:15 That's part of the deal. No comment, your honor. They made fun of me. It's a badge of honor, man. course and everybody would just start talking yeah it was just a conversation He's the original more of a hang. while other guests came on too. Like Ed Asner You're chilling with a bunch of people who are smart. boss, right? Welcome back, Cotter. It was kind of like the Washington Post or the New York Times.

34:00 He flipped the coin. Lou Grant. It was weird. That's Tony Soprano's mother, isn't it? Yeah. Bad cop shows. And they were on the same network I'll bet that's a great show. I never see them Delavan tour. I'll go transfer them. I was like, fuck you, MacGyver. An old man beats up every young punk that crosses his aisle. Do you remember Do the Right Thing?

36:48 Maybe Danny thought it was a subtle comedy. That show was so bad, it hurt your feelings. It's the best, worst show ever. It might have been just one season No way. Are you serious? Anderson in the booth. He was good for NBC. Oh my god. They're aliens, actually. It was actually It was such a great show. How fucking old are you? What? He is. You know Bob Bondurant?

40:10 That's all you need to know about this guy. and went out and just smashed. She's smart. How old is she? It's going to say Bob Bondurant and one unidentified other person died today. I'm strapped in five-part harness. Look at her. Viagra exists. He's a good guy. He's a sweetheart. He's having It certainly does. Who is that? and especially if you don't necessarily have your shit together

43:29 Because it's impossible for you to be a teenager and to be able to make up your mind whether or not you want the whole world to be able to see you for the rest of your life. I know I wouldn't have understood what I was doing, I kind of get that. It's the only game they've got to play. or suck a lot of cocks in a reality show, Yeah. What's happening in the world?

45:01 What happened to him? Well, those jackass guys, they do a lot of stuff that can get you really, really hurt. Johnny Knoxville stood right in front And he's a dad and he's like 40, right? God, I don't want to go pay to see Mick Jagger perform. But I'm not going to go to Staples Center and watch the Rolling Stones. They're well within parameters. Yeah, my concern would be parking.

47:08 Take metro. It's probably not even a real picture. It's a cartoon, not a real recurring cartoon. Even that, I wouldn't believe. I agree. Before Born to Run. There's no denying that Bruce Springsteen was and is still a bad motherfucker. As a performance space The acoustics sucked, the crowd sucked He means it was a concert. Okay. He's unchanged. I've done bad TV shows, too.

50:15 I mean, look, the bottom line with actors is if you don't give them something good to sink their teeth into, they're never going to have a good show. anybody was going to put me on television. Oh, yeah. He seems like he's probably fun, I guess. You know what I mean? He likes to do, but the thing is about Kevin, what I know for real, he likes doing those movies.

51:39 So he likes to make movies that entertain his own kids. We were always good buddies, but our comedy was always very different. Really? But when I was friends with him, he was coming up and he would, when Kevin goes crazy, No, but I can imagine It sounds funny, doesn't it? our first couple of years is this like 10 or 20 the only time I did Yeah. And the directions they gave you were always wrong.

53:57 That's a movie joke. Callan, yeah. Let's go. He does LA a lot. Oh, you got to put those up online, man. The tweets were blowing up last week on the show. Yeah. Is that what happened? 100%. No doubt about it. It was a gigantic that that's actually in dispute. That's the point. Well, they died off. If you look at, you know, if you want to like Occam's raise the shit out of it.

56:51 Mount Rainier is fucking fabulous. You need a good, solid camera, man. You can't be fucking with your iPhone. Strapped to a car? You hurt my feelings. a film with your car? It's such a fun car, man. Never say it on the air. It's so alive, that car. You don't have a fucking daily? I had one, and I got another. That's like my traffic car. If you're in LA, you have an excuse.

59:07 Well, here's the problem is that you and your Porsche parked outside, you have spent however It's not good. and go fuck yourself that's what they need to do go back to a six-speed i don't need seven speed is the game-over Porsche. It would end the 911. Yeah. So I brought my car instead. I know you do, but you know what, man? We hit a weird error right now

1:01:33 a 320 horsepower engine. Yeah. That's a lot of juice. Forgive me. Yeah, dude. I'm not going to take down Exxon. And people talk about all the newest modern supercars that aren't stick shift, right? Well, let's start breaking that down because that really is what they're doing. Yeah, and they're fucking... stomp the gas, I don't want launch control.

1:04:11 And you know what the guy who owned the car said? Does this sound like a penile extension to you? Bigger is better. You're going to run out of gas. 325 horsepower, which is a lot for a car like that. Uh-huh. That's like a plane that doesn't have wings. Yeah. Or I drove, you know, this thing, the Hennessey Venom GT. Have you seen this thing? Oh, Jesus. I mean, you could die at any second in that car. That's like a plane that doesn't have wings.

1:05:52 Top Gear Magazine did a thing with it. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Give the guy some credit. Oh, that's so crazy. Does it go to 11? enjoyment is what's important, and it's not about being a fucking complete total maniac. That's the problem with a lot of cars. Too many stoplights. in eight new helicopters and and a jean jacket and he's sweating What'd you say to them? I got caught

1:08:50 He set a record. That sounds dangerous as fuck. Right? It has a taillight cut out. Run deep, run silent. And it has night vision so we could see like driving a submarine. Oh, my God. It's like a Buck 60. Run deep, run silent. Oh, the trees are ahead. 80% of cops go right because the right is the easier turn. I got out and started pissing. Use the accent.

1:10:51 The best consumer advice would be it'll cost you even more when they catch you. that I have to pay like $1,000 a month young people out there. Learn from Matt Farah. How quickly would I be in jail for that shit? This motherfucker takes this 1971 something Porsche with a 300 horsepower engine. It was crazy. And he had a 911 with a fucking dog box in it.

1:12:41 That's so beautiful. Did he tweak the suspension? Look at him going sideways around that corner. with his sheep? And it's like somebody's car. I say, governor, you don't mind if I take your car? How did he do it? It's going to blow up like a pinto. Oh, yeah. Yeah. At the risk of sounding needy, Legitimately. It is a total, complete, At Salvage. It's like an encyclopedia.

1:16:30 That's the P45 right there. That's what $5 million gets you. Oh my God. That's insane It's a complete game over, one-of one of a kind Ferrari that is ridiculous looking. It's a lot of cues from vintage, like late 60s Ferrari race cars. My company is called Gotham Dream Cars. Ferraris with a stick? It ends up like that Ferrari. It was a Ferrari. I remember the first car that I realized was that 996 Turbo.

1:18:55 Yeah, they started it with a 993. so sweet with the little vents That's called Seinfeld money. No. He drives those. Like that 73 RS, correct me going to restore it, is he? No. He drives those. he has a 68 GT40 I love guys like that. It's not a hot wheel. Volts are super quiet, right? Right, yeah. I've never, we saw that one Tesla S that our friend from the show had.

1:21:28 And our other friend in D.C. that had one, too. It's like a Lotus with electricity. And also these electrical engines, they go, oh, you don't have to do that. ability to go through one, two, three, four, five, six. I mean, Bill's an ace of a guy. Oh, God. Really? Does he live out here? is way more efficient I own two Priuses. The Prius doesn't do that because it's a hybrid. But a Tesla does do that.

1:24:19 That's when you know you're drunk. No, you know why the Prius is shaped that way? You want to fucking talk drag coefficient? Yeah, but what's that? an E350 diesel. Yeah, they're good cars. Why slippery? This is where engineering genius. You're 100 miles an hour in a Prius guy. Those are not fast by any stretch of the imagination. Did you ever see the episode of Top Gear where they went around the track with an M3 and a Prius?

1:26:34 I believe that. Wow. I've listened to your show, and you talk about MMA, and that's fucking geeky to me. We're dorks. Let's just face it. We should do that. I own it. There's nothing wrong with being a're doing. He's not dissing it. He's just calling it out. I'm saying what it is is what it is. We're dorks. We're dorks. That's how it happens. Fire up.

1:27:55 There's an era of cars that I really like, and that era is the same where I like the I like a lot. crank that shit to this day. fucking, you know, from now until forever. actually not far at all from here. whole board out of there. and the pops of the needle It's the vinyl record imperfections that make it great. Yeah, yeah. Whereas something that is analog will be analog forever.

1:31:35 It's the perfect storm of collectability because it will be what it is. You know? So you got to ship it on fucking Top Gear, Todd. and it makes me want to get one. Yeah. It's so crazy. It's not good. Too much. So what is that at the crank? That's such a great bargain. Yeah. Because girls won't blow you because you're driving one. That's interesting.

1:34:53 I want all them magazine covers. He got every magazine cover. It's too crazy. Also, one of the reasons why I got it is I wanted to buy a car from a company that didn't take a check from the government. something up here? This is kind of delicate. But you take one to a track and you're like, I don't know about this. The stock exhaust is fucking perfect.

1:36:51 This fucking one poor sap is out at the Romeo Proving Grounds I do not want to fuck with that guy in a red light contest. Alone, though. No, I'm not stupid. Okay, well, I'm not as involved. faster because you can shift the gears for me I would like to do that please Some of them can't. Like your Prius. And then when you're seeing a guy like Chris Harris going around

1:39:39 suck compared to Chris Harris. you're expected to drive Hotter if you're a chick. Yeah, everybody's excited about them. You're something mysterious. No. You have this custom Corvette. You should try it. But to a chick, they'd be like, what is this? Yeah, sure. Was that a good sign, though, for the rest of the night? Do they know that for sure? Why don't you question that shit?

1:43:07 You're like, what the fuck, man? How many brothers and sisters? I'm done now. I'm admiring that. My ex does derby. The angry lesbians probably know her. It's just unfiltered. different way, contrary to nature, What does that even mean? But that's not corporate. It was later because of content or whatever? that I'm sure got left on the editing floor too. four minutes. That's what it is with commercials. And there was a lot of cool moments, you know, on Fairfactor,

1:45:53 There's a, inspirational moments. and they were a little cunty, were going to win because they had a physical advantage. cameraman were crying i was crying is there an audience everybody was crying no no there was That's a real reaction. So I love that show because it was like, hey, you're going to do some crazy shit. Like, the behind-the-scenes people, everybody's so nice.

1:47:52 Yeah, yeah. Speed was horrible. Pulitzer. He wrote about cars? Wired Science science I did a didn't use him for cars we dove this And John Sally, who was the greatest. People ask me every day how I got Tried to do graphic design. So we hired him. And I was a car journalist the next fucking week. It's a cool gig because there's always going to be someone who, like car guys, love to watch videos on cars.

1:51:03 I love the designs of them. And everyone has a background in photography or video. We make it like TV. I don't have to answer to some fuck in a suit. It should piss you off. Porsche video watch that at least four times I made 12 cents off that thanks It's got like this. Yeah, I've seen a couple of your videos on it. So this guy, the guy who owns this car, his name is Eric.

1:54:20 Right. You would hear, well, if you did it once, No, none. You violate your warranty. And we put a fucking 200-shot dry fogger on it. People don't know what nitrous does. basically by hitting a button I mean, no until it is. I would say yes every time. Got a million views Fortunately we got Enterprise His pictures at every I think so. That seems reasonable.

1:57:26 And then I realized why. Hold on a second right there. What did that car do in a past life? Oh, there's the video. Hello, everybody at Hertz. When they take a hit, they kind of explode. they're only known for being what do you call it you don't call it blow it no blow what did you call it what is spray a spray Is it a Halliburton? Yeah, I guess. You would pop the hood.

2:00:04 Wow. that that Ford Taurus so it's Price is Right rules, drag racing. It's fun. You ever watch any of that shit? It's nasty stuff. You know what you should do, actually? How much money have you spent in your Porsche? OK? of highway shut down and you want to You're by yourself, basically And then, you know, But it's 91 miles. I barely grapple. I love driving cars.

2:03:49 It's fascinating when you watch adrenaline lock someone up too. Everybody has sort of a different approach, Some people manage it with, like, silence. Yeah. That's horrible. fucking minutes and i would tell a story or two and i got some decent laughs but i felt like i They're already fans. or go to an open mic night. Pros sounds really scary to me.

2:06:37 Yeah. This is okay. But I feel like there's something different from being funny around people you know You could do it. It's probably perfect for your personality. If you have an ability to communicate and you have something to say, you can figure it out. It's whoever the fuck you really are. Why? No, I'm not in that business of saving. You don't need to shrink dude. It sucks. Why? Todd's going to save you now. Why?

2:08:15 Yeah, but you're a different person now. Opie and Anthony being one of the reasons why you got into it, that you saw them and Like disgusting things To want that much attention, to put yourself up in front of that many people, you get to a position like that That was an interesting girl. I never watched that show. Allegedly pretending, just fibbing.

2:10:16 and to know that mushrooms are still illegal if you're listening to this. Hold on. What's Schedule 1? It helps me, straight up. No, they still, In opiates, They use it for something. I know They marry inside your nose when they do surgery on it. and he's a good doctor and he's good at it, please get it fixed. I broke my nose. I wasn't good, every time I've had

2:12:28 which has been my spine have you had done and I burst the L4, L5 disc. Did you guys crash? No. The Baja 1000 race in 2003. That's that crazy race down in Mexico? In Mexico. It's off-road. They're like massive three-foot. year. That motherfucker 35-inch travel. I didn't do Baja. Are we on camera? So it bursted again, and I had to have it fixed again.

2:14:27 The next step is fusion, and that's bad. Oh, I see. You know what, man? I was in in great shape You know, my life sounds super glamorous when it's hacked down to 10 minutes a week. So it's just basically through your connections in the car world? Look, a lot of people, I'm sure, called that place and said, I want one of those fucking things. but you don't find out about it until 2024,

2:17:29 save me the fucking premium octane. to fix. They're easy to run. Yeah. The science is not good? But I really It drives like a fucking car. this is weird. And we googled And who knows what's happening there. There might be That it really like the amount of devastation was fairly mild in comparison to the amount of fucking oil that went into the ocean.

2:19:43 Ruined, like, a lot of the fishing. It was bad. Yeah. I think it in their tracks. Ruined like a lot of the fishing. You would drive over it in your boat and you'd be like, oh, it looks like water. Isn't it? We really need to pay attention to that because it's at the core of the entire global ecosystem, and nobody's really paying much attention. I'm not smart enough to understand that argument,

2:21:07 This is going to be a problem. strange when you look back at like the ice age and know that half of North America was covered Yeah. Richard Nixon, of all people. I'll see my friends go on press launches over there and stuff. Yeah. It's like shitty diesel engines. It's incredible. What? Yep. If we have enough people, that's going to be a problem at some point?

2:24:43 It'll just handle itself. It makes rational sociological sense. If you I don't think anybody banks on 30 years I'm going to have a baby and wait for that baby to get me some food. Mormons. Mormons too. It's like, how We have levels of Jew that- You're crazy. But everything else that it's wrapped up in, it's a group of kid fuckers a crazy cult Even if you're a Jew?

2:27:47 That's how I got it. That's fascinating. But all I care about with religious people is that if they really do adhere to the principles of the religious doctrines, they're usually pretty nice people. Not at all. If you. There's no god What the fuck really happened different stories about what went down who was shooting at who and what they did to the body

2:29:55 We made like Sumerian scrolls. All right, we got to try it. We're going to make it simple. That is the most common sense religious statement ever made. I mean, why else would it be a burning bush? They were doing their best. Well, why would not you consider psychedelics? Well, it's a sleeping pill now, which is interesting. But for the longest time, people were afraid to say it. For the longest time, people were afraid to say it. Why wouldn't they have psychedelics? Of course they would. Of course they'd have psychedelics. But for the longest time, people were afraid to say it.

2:32:40 Yeah. What happened to those bushes catching on fire? Nah. Think about how many other religions are there, though. So does Elvis. They just said they were going to resume peace talks, Israel and Palestine. There's groups of people that believe they have problems with other groups of people, there. many goddamn people like you know it's just too many fucking egos.

2:34:43 But someone's going to be selfish if you have more than four people. Give each other the finger Whoever gives you the finger It's always Yeah. When you're in a car, you're like, ah, fuck you. Any of them. that's screaming at people in traffic. drive like a dick. There have been way yeah and you know when i back off by the time he got beside me he's like fuck you

2:37:11 oh my god he had like a lot of tattoos long time ago this is 1990 ish I'll never forget that cat it's because I'm What is this video of? He just stepped out Video mixing. It's a rolling Mah my story, Jamie. Please stop this. This is distracting. Video mixing. I mean, I'm familiar with that particular Indian vehicle. It's like a three-wheeled thing.

2:38:58 And a truck, and a family hauler, and a school It's on chromes. So it's essentially Yeah. It's just the way it is i mean and This is non-racist. and they don't look to the right, intersections when he said this it i i i you know like because he was talking about cultural yeah At the other end of the spectrum, have you seen the crazy Arab drifting? NASCAR'd out with the sponsors and shit.

2:41:51 And you just hog wallah into traffic to the delight of thousands. At 90 miles an hour, right? Because if that guy comes down, that wheel isn't back on, he's fucked. Oh my god look at this Yeah, but it doesn't matter. So the axle without the wheel isn't spinning. And I mean very lightly. No, people die doing this shit all the fucking time. This guy's hanging out the fucking window.

2:43:57 Is that what it is or are they just a gangster? Outside of what looks like a Hyundai Elantra. Oh, my God. Are those just street scandals? It's great fun, right? Yeah. Thank you, Matt Farah. All one word. And what's your website? TheSmokingTire.com TheSmokingTire on Twitter. All one word. And what's your you also have the old stuff is all the Smoking Tire,

2:45:53 Keep doing it. Yeah, and you also did it with an Audi, the R8 V10. Yeah, he's the editor of Motor Trend. Follow him too, you fucks. More than 100,000 things to download. Use the code name Rogan. What? I'm on Sci-Fi. Enjoy the shit out of it, freaks. And Todd Misereau. That was fun.