Joe Rogan Experience #528 — Michael Stevens, from VSauce Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out! youtube page like if you go to some of your videos and you know you're like well what is this video makes you think about the world and sort of appreciate the things you don't even think about In fact, I think in the years – oh, man. Right. you know, Yeah. black hole is potentially another universe that every galaxy has a super massive black hole it's

4:11 But actually, you know, if you go far enough out, you curve around like an ant on a globe. Well, nothing. Nothing. It's like, no, that really is just the way this pen stays on the table is incredible. Then things become magic. They're beyond color. So even if we built like a super cool machine that tried to be better than our eyes, there's no color to see.

6:35 just like a fighter jet it looked really corny yeah she had she was like an economy seven yeah We're not seeing them like I see you. which means a particle that is moving and still at the same time, like how are they doing that? with educators? Because if someone's been basing their entire life and their career writing books, That's what matters. teaching something,

9:41 not because he was insane but because it was just like, we hadn't advanced science enough, right? had not only do they have like just a rudimentary understanding of the earth and its position in Can you imagine landing on a place where no one had been before? And it's where Darwin sort of landed and partially where he formed his theories about evolution.

11:49 And it's – in the greater spectrum of life on Earth, it's nothing. Yeah, that's true. And I think, you know, you find the right experts. God. They're trying to figure out what it would sound like to hear Gilgamesh talk. I used to write back then. kind of wedges almost yeah wedges and they were like crude and weird looking that's what cuneiform well it's also it's got to be maddening there's a um national geographic i think it's yeah pretty

15:14 evolved like our idea of i mean is that that would be ridiculous like what the fuck don't figured out i mean there wouldn't be much left unless somehow or another, genetically, that information is stored or the revelations are somehow or another, if there's a large enough segment of the population. that nobody can explain, like Baalbek and Lebanon It's way older than that. I did a video on putting history

17:20 But I thought woolly mammoths died out 10,000 years ago. Yeah, yeah. that are carved into it meaning like you have a large stone and you cut the stone down but leave or who did it or what the culture was and it's all new stuff over the last couple decades i found but they don't even know really how old it is. around hundreds of thousands a million i mean yeah it's like i'll never meet those people

20:26 this planet and just one with this one bizarre life form that alters its environment right the Yeah, especially when they didn't i mean not that Anyway, he was talking about how there are tribes that don't believe you're actually human until you're much older than a baby. Right, right. You just sit there and you go, wow, there's a lot of diversity of everything on earth, life and ideas.

22:41 We're bizarre. Yeah, yeah. I don't know. we all just think humans are all pretty similar Shaquille O'Neal and a female dwarf. Totally different animals? can't fuck a pigeon and have a baby. I meant the eagle. can breed because hybrids in other uh species are usually sterile but right hybrids with human Stay healthy. Don't you think? Well, it has to get rid of some waste that it doesn't want anymore.

27:26 Yeah. They've been able to make machines that can poop. You put food in and then it's got bacteria and And it's actually a medical thing because when people have GI problems, Isn't that crazy? It's got to be totally organic. Just eat it, bitch. You come back, we'll have many, many things to talk about. The Shaq. I think that's his ex-wife, actually.

30:29 Yeah. I'm back. Oh, I use it all the time. Every time. No, uh, I do get concerned. I'm like, am I peeing enough? I'm very insecure about how much I pee. of this pre-pee conversation. Those two things solidified the fact that they were all humans together. Wow. Yeah. Oh, it is. And to this day, they have recreated. Von Daniken used that as an argument

34:29 well we maybe we were visited but you're like oh just fucking christ he's one of those guys But I would like for them to show me experiments they've devised that will give us evidence for that. credible that thinks that aliens created the pyramids. But what they do think is that they It would make fun fiction, though. earlier, that was the whole premise of this guy Zechariah Sitchin's work.

36:03 Because he believed that the Sumerian text, if you deciphered it correctly, proves that we were engineered by something called the Anunnaki. that show what looks like the double helix of DNA. Yeah. that they took sub-human primates who have studied the cuneiform and studied the Sumerian text, There are actually protocols already in place place not officially adopted by any government but protocols

38:47 It wasn't living on the moon, but it was just, it was transferred there. or like space preservation. So the should not take place over those sites. Yeah. They had them that they had made out of leather. But it's going to take you fucking forever. Yeah, Daddy will call you when he lands. it took so many years that people died, people were born. Virgin Galactic as well, right?

42:24 Oh, my God, that's amazing. Fucking A. But the DMV, man, it's going to take no matter where you were, and you welcome them. They uh they you know you welcome it's like, fuck, man. But you do. Fenced off, militarized, lit up. Yeah. That really is a great wall. The Good Wall would have to be like 2,000 miles. That's legit. Yeah. And to go from – I went from Washington, D.C. to Mumbai.

47:49 I haven't been following the story well enough. And I was like, no way. Or just a slingshot, honestly. But aren't pilots essentially running almost entirely on autopilot these days? I was thinking this the other day while I was traveling. parking lot it's filled with cars yeah time square you go you know you walk through there's thousands And I'm like, I'm clean.

50:14 At heart. You guys don't feel that too? not a criminal and i'm not a threat i'm not a terrorist and i don't have any plans on ever So it's not that. And you have to be treated by these people that are getting paid very little money in high-stress situations. Like a meter maid. bottles of booze like the concert venue sold booze but obviously they were in paper cups and plastic

53:29 And once you pass through that border, you can't bring it back. after the one summer there like i'm never again. But someone has to do that job. I don't know, but the job sucks. Yeah. And everywhere you go, people were trying to get the bottle of wine that they want to have, Cops are one of the worst. middle of a crime yeah everyone's speeding and they're lie didn't know

56:09 Right. the case with police. If they could lie. and the dog ate it Right? It is. Yeah. Right? Here's another question. same speed right would the dogs be like ah whatever it's the year uh 10 000 bc it's fine I don't think there would be. mastiff that's more athletic wow and he also made sure that these dogs are have no dog aggression It's really, really fascinating.

1:00:27 What you have in your head. No. But you would know way more than they would. And I'm like, well, I don't exactly know. But does that mean that i could contained explosion, because someone figured out velocity and speed and how much energy comedians made up in between the past and now. You don't know about Monsanto. You're just making up fictional stories.

1:04:38 that had lived in the 1800s or 1700s or whatever the fuck it was. Maybe food, like cooking. I'd like, you know, find a farm and I could grow food. smart guy you'd probably be able to figure out a lot of shit you'd definitely make some errors but I mean, literally. But we need to balance each other out. It's a bad mix for them. Like you develop a whole new set of social issues.

1:08:55 just invented. Like, where did that come from? I want to witness the, I can imagine all kinds It probably started off with who can pick up the heaviest sword, who's the biggest. It happens with all sorts of primates. new challenges and new competition and then everybody will have to well that competition should stop and this is all terrible and morally and ethically absolutely i

1:12:17 amount of compensation for their efforts for their efforts like mic Microsoft achieved this global dominance they want about Bill Gates is the That'd be awesome. Well, you don't even have to think about it. I think it really is true that the whole story about if Bill Gates walked down the street and saw a quarter in the street and he went out of his way to pick it up, he would lose

1:14:15 Well, also there's a weird thing of you become this bizarre target. A lot of it is in other assets, and it's not all liquid. and give everyone accept the utopia they'd always find a reason to be unhappy well they'd always want to be the alpha A million isn't, you know, it's not as much as you would think. of hundreds, it's a relatively small pile. Yeah. And a billion gets pretty big, but a trillion is

1:16:52 Here's the image. And here's a trillion. That's a lot of fucking money. And all because drugs are illegal. to make money look legitimate. And cash. of it in your house means that maybe you could totally go for like nice dinners all the time Well, you know, Oh, no kidding. In cash. Yeah, and exchange it so you have essentially have these workers you know I don't know how much they're paying in per hour but they're

1:20:26 In Colorado. No, I think you have to. because they did it illegally. by my friend Billy Corbin. Man. Wow. Because only criminals could sell it, and then they had to compete for dominance. In his backyard. but it was like, well, you know, if you pay in cash, it's like $200 less. And I'm like, really? So I just went seen that before i've had people say to me, do you have a visa?

1:24:15 American Express was always a weird one, too, because it was one where you paid it all off at the end of the month, which I liked. Because otherwise, why would it benefit someone to pay in cash? I'm going legal. I had checks in some other city. You can't? I'm not understanding why this story is so weird. you've got $50,000 on you. Here's my paperwork.

1:27:04 Well, really yep he goes out to his car they grab bags and they fill like a million dollars. They give it to you in cash. Like before I used to be the commentator for the UFC, I would bet on fights. two-to-one favorite and he really should be a five-to-one underdog happens all the time. things off and that's how you sort of formulate the odds and a lot of times the odds makers are

1:29:52 a real gambling man i would uh i'd be fucking killing them with that yeah that's that's who's not going to fold up. This guy dropped the ball last week. And they're right so often. I don't get it, someone's going to try to do really well at it. That's what they do. They're like, look, it's not even worth it to me to fight this one i'm gonna save that energy for something else yeah well there's there's definitely that and there's other people

1:33:00 I paid for like the best insurance, like replacement policy. I don't know her that well. She had made the claim and the whole deal and gotten paid. But isn't it amazing that you could just do that? Well, that's how i felt because this this That's happened many times. They traced it to the person's house. Super awkward. Um, and I've been using this thing called Google now, which is, uh, really pretty fun.

1:35:53 Here's a conversion between the currency you usually spend and the currency that they use where you are now. By who? that tell our locations and speeds. That's a fact. Yeah. I'm sure there's different ways that it works. The GPS didn't work. The GPS didn't work. I mean, it depends what your plan is and what device you're using, but. Uh-oh. They were driving by putting their hand across their eyes and resting it on a mattress.

1:39:00 Well, I know the path. It's just a metal tube that's relying on radar. Yeah, it is. deepest depths of the earth crazy fuck Well, that's what he would do. I want to see a list of the top 10 You're allowed to... That's what it would be? but you know what that's the kind of wish that could easily you had to be careful what you wish for how long Yeah. The ability to teleport.

1:42:52 And then also when you teleported, would it still be you? I had a great time yesterday. I mean, I can recall things in my head that I'm reasonably sure I did. didn't start 10 seconds ago? Or your life didn't start 10 seconds ago. Yeah. Or at the very least, when you arose, when your consciousness, I mean, you know for sure, I think it's Wednesday. and that this is the path that I'm on

1:45:04 But isn't that of all the people i could have been seen out of You know, you can record video and audio. or whether it be some sort of a neural implant that's able to accurately record what you see What's my take on this Is it? a lot of information. cia disinformation agent and like it's, really bizarre when you listen to it. Right. It has to all be part of some plan.

1:49:03 Okay, but here's a good one. Well, then you believe in conspiracies. Do you believe that the government has tried to hide things from people? No. I think I read about false flag operations, all these things, and that one came up. Like the people that were running the government at that point in time, at least, 1962, Everything must elevate, including conspiracies.

1:51:41 other american you know military people who are working in cahoots with the If you don't believe in conspiracies, I believe you're infantile. clouds over where does that idea begin the chemtratrail idea? Yeah. Begins with just, well. And in the interview, he was talking about chemtrails, it's making everybody fighting. Okay. But yet it's targeted okay but he's formulated this but made no attempt whatsoever to understand a is this possible b is

1:54:32 A jet engine passes through condensation. The point about what's the simplest explanation, that's the key thing. Okay. But yet, Prince will go on television and have this really detailed idea that he has in his head Tell me why. See, unfortunately, this discussion's going to start to barrel into a discussion about Some of them, since the record is so new, I'm learning some of them. I got just scoot ahead a little bit

1:57:30 Yeah. Fascinating scientific terms like that when they talk about really ridiculous shit. First of all, they think it's like aluminum and barium. I believe there's a real threat to security, peace, prosperity in this world. danger the real concern is not these artificial clouds the real concern is the fact that you're Who is the government? Switch the sound back over here.

2:00:23 And the next thing you know, everybody in your neighborhood was fighting and arguing, and you didn't know why. and try to get a copy of it and just listen to it I want to hear the song. Did you ever hear about the gay bomb? Yeah. so urban legends i think were way easier to spread they still spread they still spread but And it wasn't until I grew up

2:03:11 Yeah. Yeah. Did he do that for fun, or was it a about as bizarre as the Gerbil, was that this was when Richard Gere had left Right, right, right. Is this just one of those things where everyone has a friend who saw this happen? And then I realized that it's just everyone has a friend who's had this experience. It's my favorite place to visit. Their whole history was just oral tradition.

2:07:33 Incredible. it looks like a fish and all this kind of thing. And that's what they thought their land was. It What the fuck? It's just a matter of convention that makes maps easier to read. If you try to read and I think it goes something like a hunter walks 10 feet south You have to go south a little bit A step? Because if you're on that point, your body's already bigger measuring the point that is the north or south pole?

2:10:59 I don't know. I haven't actually read a lot about what that could cause. a good compass and also they use that you have change how you can think. And if you lived in changing but if you're facing if you're talking about stage right, would you talk about west or They don't have a word for left and right. L with your hand right and the one that looks like an L is your left.

2:14:17 Like where's your thumb pointing? And if it's holding your other hand up and it's making an L to the other person, is it really called? full of water. And then they pour the water into the other container. And they're like, that kind of makes sense when you think about how animals will make themselves look bigger process of realizing, oh, that's actually stayed constant.

2:16:58 Bears will stand up on their hind legs. Well, it's not that they're dumb. Yeah. The idea. can be passed down to children. having to be taught but it's never been replicated but wouldn't that be cool if we found out that Because it was programmed into their DNA that that smell equals danger. more. And so that's why. Well, I think that's probably true as well. I think it's one of those

2:20:47 is when i started so in and i've also been a commentator for more than a thousand professional But I don't think it's instinctual. But my daughter goes to it immediately. I didn't teach her to do it. I don't think that that's a natural thing for a baby to have. natural to them it's very strange I think if you catch people young enough The oldest has younger people around.

2:23:35 And so it takes them a little longer to figure out how to communicate like an adult. Dude, we're alike. You can do it. He's a slave to his bladder. These kind of conversations are always really cool, though. It was their parents doing it. Like the amount of information that we have. Right, right. So at this point in time, when we're talking about information being transferred from parents to children,

2:27:08 We've got audio recording of Michael Stevens saying, I don't know. But it's just one of those things. Yeah. Never really gets going. We noticed it. Really? So if you watched a lava lamp, so if we had that lava lamp on and we maintain the same amount of heat coming off of the light bulb and the same water temperature and the wax. Would it be possible to make an ultimate lava lamp that was incredibly precise

2:29:57 put in special controls that like didn't release the wax until it was ready or whatever. Is it the wax moving up and down through the water is affecting all the other molecules It would eventually lead to be a hurricane. It's just the point is that that little difference in initial conditions could result in a completely dramatically different outcome.

2:31:15 It just means that you have no idea how many variables are involved. And one little thing changes another little thing, and that can cause an end result that is way bigger wings well this is more of like yeah it this isn't like we've studied it and we found a butterfly and sun, like that's it, right? So pushing off? Butterflies and shit. Like, yeah, yeah.

2:34:16 Oh, right, right, right. I want to say it's thousands of years, but I don't remember the exact. it was pointing towards the constellation Leo. they think that they want to attribute to the Sphinx to the same people that Yeah, they date back as far You know, we believe in Ramses. We believe in, you know, Thutmose. We believe in all Yeah. Yeah, Boston University.

2:36:54 then these stones had to be cut way, And every 20, sort of like a top. lines up pretty close to what they believe Okay. No, no. The theory is that just this huge interruption of life, It's in multiple spots all over the place at the same time. slammed with meteor showers, massive amounts of people die, Yeah. Well, the idea that it's been a linear progression, complete linear progression,

2:40:23 all the different cataclysmic events but they heard it before. Yeah, yeah. It was going on when the star supernova to create carbon, which created carbon-based life, which created us, which created everything that came before us, which is going to create everything that comes from us. how different would we be pretty crazy stuff I would guess radically different yeah yeah I think

2:43:27 But I think that the real change is going to come with our integration of technology in our lives. That's what we're going to look like. eyes those are giant sunglasses are built into your head no longer need to move things physically aliens we're gonna look like aliens we're gonna have these big goofy beach ball heads and this is a big stipulation people say oh you

2:46:14 other part of the plant anything's a vegetable that's not a fruit really yeah well because So, again, it's like I can't tell you whether it's a vegetable or not. They're not going to grow you a banana tree. It's very good to be. No, I've been here for a few days. Those can really... People don't care about my pee. I just think it's so cool that something like What Color is a Mirror has 10 million views on YouTube.

2:48:56 Tweetsauce on Twitter, Vsauce on YouTube. Thanks to Blue Apron for being awesome. on Saturday, a special Saturday