Joe Rogan Experience #622 — Adam Carolla Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Ladies and gentlemen, Adam Carolla's here! You do stand-up comedy. You know, what I'm saying is, over Christmas time, me and my eight-year-old twins, are the ones that get passed on versus the podcast and look i'm sure someone long after we'll be we're It was just like, it was two things for me in movies. Right. So I made a movie called The Hammer like eight years ago.

3:36 Right. And they're like going, hey, it's going to be down at Hilarity's in Addison, Texas. So the story's money. They don't exist anymore, right? I'm moving to Hollywood. Yeah. Interesting. and then you think wait a minute this guy's kind name. Like, this guy's a little bit of a household name. Why is he playing that shitty club? Right. as far as I could tell. I mean, like the phone wasn't ringing and the only way and I had young twins and I just had to hit the road and I didn't have an act.

7:57 to really like started to crack is uh we did we our our gig was we're going to book a night at Cobb, Thursday night at Cobb's in San Francisco. Oh, the first show is sold out. And I used to say to someone, show second show third show they all sold out so they kept adding them and before you knew it i i sticks or the chicken fingers mike but i got them both he'd just be watching college football the

10:38 They're happy to see me, but that's not going to last 95 minutes. it, But eventually what I would do is, you know, I'd, I'd walk through Kirkland, Washington You're not going to get penalized by it. visible visible joe rogan is he's at least 35 more visible with an orange flag over his head But after, you know, obviously after what started happening is then, you know, next

13:25 name yeah yeah danny bonaduce would do an act like it's just like you don't have an act but you do Skippy, though, I mean, to give the Skippy his due, he was doing it like when he was doing it. Went out in, like, the wilderness and, like, killed himself. The Montreal Comedy Festival was this big wacky on stage sort of jim carrey-esque and the less aware of the industry,

15:41 but they kind of go with, There's a lot of comics that, you know, love all sorts of weird marginal acts. And literally, that was the end of the development deal. Somebody's going to have to. Well, you know, I was saying the other day, you know, I think second only to cops in suicide, Robin Williams, yeah. family ties we'll see what happened yeah so i had to go out and like just tough it out and it was

17:54 did you have any sort of a severance package or a cushion? watch it I'm gonna watch this weekend though I'm going to Dallas oh watch it So for me, it mixes things up. I know guys who go out for like 20, 30 days in a row. Do you recognize those? They might not be yours. They don't work aesthetically for you. one for him? Go get him one. We have a real

21:12 This says may have a gun. Roots. Wow, it's really nice. I'm not fishing in my pockets for coins. So now I'm going fanny pack. Hold on a second. This is like Roots, the luggage company from Canada. I'm excited. So I contacted Roots and had them make one with my logo on it i was thinking Well, he got to a point, I think, where he was kind of mocking himself.

24:19 He used to do John Travolta. Well, it's this weird trap. I started off doing Mr. Burcham, the shop teacher, out here. How did it go? And he wasn't going to be making it in. And nobody messes with my drill index. and super nice to one kid It all gets channeled into the one terrier or something. knew from home building. And this guy became this like overnight sensation because they didn't know

28:42 So when you came in and you did it as Adam Carolla, was it like, boy, I don't know, Adam, do you think you could do it as Mr. Burcham. So when you came in and you did it as Adam Carolla, like, was it like, boy, I don't know, Adam. So were you wearing a condom? and then the rest of the cities didn't know Mr. Burcham, so it wouldn't have made sense. and he's doing it.

30:25 Yeah. and dialed in and then stood out in the driveway you know so he didn't hear me in the room that's It was like standing out in his driveway talking on his, not even his cordless, you know, his home phone. I started in 09. And first, when I started it, I was doing it on Ustream. And then Anthony Cumia from Opie and Anthony, he's got some crazy fucking setup in his basement.

32:48 I was just in New York going, fucking running in a circle. That's all done now. The patent troll thing? Well, not only pull you into court, but pull you into their court in you know eastern good old boys club going how much you want to piss off the guy you're going to the country club with. And it's like, no, he doesn't. They drag things out. we love each other but this is not working out let's just break up the attorneys will try to

36:49 used to touch you i would have gone like jake lamotta before he went to the pawn shop i would We're both reasonable people. You could be burned. he'd pull the plug the next day was going through this and uh we had a conversation about it where he had a really bad relationship gone through these breakups where he'd moved out and then moved back in. And, you know, they'd fight like cats and dogs and like, fuck this, I'm done.

39:51 she's doing cocaine which literally makes you psychotic they want a settlement through zoloft Just give her half. The wife gets it. Night Live until he was in his late 30s. conversation away from people that are dead or missing where's skippy by the way did you find him So the podcast community, especially with guys like Joe, got together and we stood up to these guys because they know how much litigation costs.

42:14 it'll be so much easier just to pay that, move on. They're not there to take a moral stand. But either way, I was just like, look, it's not an option for me to cut you a check for $300,000, $500,000, whatever you're asking for. God damn it. and they got a big corporation, what they found was, Yeah, yeah. Because it doesn't seem... It's amazing. Yeah, I mean, I imagine.

46:11 It's an update out of Texas. What the fuck is wrong with this world? Wow. No, but I've realized that I was thinking about it and I thought, you know, the amount of businesses, you know, let's just pick a time. 1952. But I just think almost economy Four of them that are going on concurrently. there was a time when the father would look at the son or let's go see what we can get for Mr. Johnson.

50:40 slow poisoning you know it's it's this sort of, you know, income inequality. Yeah, why One, two, You're calling your kids and wife an asshole? They think that everything should be socialism. carolla do you not understand that there's a built-in inequality in our system right now? humping drywall on a construction site you don't say he's not working hard and i'm like yeah he's

53:18 languages. You don't. If you don't speak five languages, you're not fucking equal to that guy. the reward you get out of it, or if you do it intelligently, at least. but my dad didn't do shit and i got more money than Dr. Drew. So what, They might be distracted while they're playing that chess life when it comes to capitalism when it comes to me forget capitalism

55:34 thing i'm i'm working all day but by the way what first off and and then the next thing they do is Wow. I fucked. I ate out. but it was still fun yeah i mean half the shit i did you know i was didn't cost anything we money does do the big thing that it did for for me, when I first got my first development, That's good, too. What it does is it stops you from worrying about shit that makes you unhappy.

58:36 Little shit like that just fucks you up, you know, and there's always the, you know, when Don't get greedy. All that goes away. But the whole point But don't you think when we're constantly hitting everyone over the head, I can't stand Did that beautiful woman, did she earn that? you know I've met giant basketball players I'm like fuck like this is not even this is not

1:00:49 I don't even know who that is. I get it. How dare you? should be. It's just, let's not convince that person that they can't do anything. Let's just Here you are. Here you are It'd be really fun, first six months, and then she'd come down to a five. interesting, tattooing their face up. An old woman. He's still doing stand-up. Boy, he looks like he drinks.

1:03:46 Making waves as a comic. Oh, this my movie, Joe. Yeah, back to your movie. Because you're cisgender, white privileged I'll tell you why they aren't where they are because they didn't have the white privilege. That's amazing. on me the whole time. That's nice. You're being sued by white people, I'm sure. No. Man, they didn't like you talking shit about their corporation, their entity, their LLC.

1:06:41 Wow. And I do. to the mexican lady barber 12 haircuts i don't give a shit and she has no idea who i am and but you start talking to that never gave you your money back, and by the way, are pissed at you. She's always done her own shit. I bet he'd be fucked. Well, that's what I'm saying is the successful one. younger. I got into a lot of I'll loan you

1:10:38 money. How you doing? I go, listen, man, I'm fucking crazy busy. I'm not getting it. I. Well, you don't even have to get involved. Nope, I'm not doing it. I go, listen, man, I'm fucking crazy busy. I'm going to do all the work. a warehouse No. It'll be another one of your friends. Because you got the warehouse, and they don't. Like, this idea that the government creates jobs.

1:13:40 And the message should be, pick yourself up by your own fucking bootstraps. Get your shit together and work hard. Now she's figured out how to make millions of dollars. Good luck getting him out of your house. That's even worse. Because that's what pays lawyers off, conflict. How much does that add to the average price of a car? and how we've completely lost our humanity.

1:17:36 or make a studio or something like that. But a guy had a lease for like nine months. And he said, I need you to sign this piece of paper. I said, what do we need a paper for? for another four months but i'm not signing a release. Wow. And the guy said, fine. and said, hey man, you still have five months left on your lease, What are you, an imbecile?

1:20:04 And a lot of people were aware of this issue but they knew that a recall would be incredibly Yes. burst into flames. Yeah. That's the classic story that we had all heard. Yeah. You actually knew The whole car just went up. And Ford knew about it. this, that are trying to form their own identity and carve their own path. The key is to not and it's time to get to work.

1:23:35 I've got a crazy schedule. I will absolutely 100% do that. And you've been fucking one with Dennis Miller now you're doing on podcast one.