Joe Rogan Experience #717 — Steve-O Transcript

Transcript

0:00 Gentlemen, we're live! Well, I had two different ones. Oh, no way. And I kept landing on my head, yeah. My crane one was completely fucking idiotic. What's that dot? I think they automatically cut it in half and then maybe even get out quicker. of jail i'm sure i could i could have done like community service like uh you know whatever like i was like no dude because i'm a

3:20 So they kept postponing my arraignment. What was the first time? Right. Oh, so it was not like that. Right. Right, but that's a good disappear. Right. and I was in Norway So then I flew from Norway to Sweden so that it would you know you put it on video oh yeah yeah totally and then you know because it took days it didn't come out for like six and a half days so so so every like like a reporter like wrote their article or whatever it was and the cops read the newspaper

7:20 Yeah. They said it was, like, a key. It's been over 10 years. But yeah, Sweden, that was wild man and you know? maybe I'll be in Sweden for a while. lazy, I think, and they're not cool. That is the one that drives me the most nuts. No. What the fuck happened? Bouncers are pro. and these three like football player the college football player bouncers like they just lifted

11:36 I'd said that maybe fuck him up. In my head, the mantra, the show must go on. So they turned it over to the that's a crime so they turned But the people that watched this video, they really were upset with Steve-O. and I'm holding the industrial staple gun, which was a saving grace, man, I don't think he even had brain damage. But yeah, I got properly sued.

14:43 But, you know, I's that's not that good, but you know I give you know They really, really, it was upsetting. She's in her desk. One guy grabbed me, took me out back, And then just punch me in. And there's the L.A. Fugitive Division. They had a fugitive warrant out of Louisiana. charge and the thing was Oh, my God. Well, yeah. my self-portrait oh yeah yeah i've seen it that's right yeah. Yeah. And they were like, oh, you'll be fine in here, man.

18:42 Fuck yeah. And I mean, I hadn't really broken out yet, you know? and then come back again. excited told the public defender guy was like was like, man, I can't afford to go home and come back again. And it was pretty mellow because like in Orlando they said like, you know, You're going to keep it like this. Like, you know, that was, like, sort of the incentive to, like, be on your best behavior.

21:53 Because only people who go down to the dungeon are, like, dangerous people that you don't want to be, like, fucking with. And it worked. And in prison, I think that's where you can get whatever you want and all that. But I couldn't get, I was doing back flips for extra food and shit. you come to Orlando on vacation, you leave on probation, They got SeaWorld in Orlando and San Antonio and San Diego.

24:43 And I like to think, maybe it's just a coincidence, but I like to think that I got people sort of talking about it, you know, like, thinking about it. And then they were like, you know what? Fuck those people. I used to love it going as a kid. I think smarter, too, because just their loyalty and shit like that. I mean, there's this like- The ocean's a dog-eat-dog world, or a dolphin-eat-baby world, or a killer whale-eat-whale world.

26:19 He just dives in to go swim with them, you know? They've saved drowning people before. dark and when you see those sea world commercials they're like we haven't taken orcas from the wild I grew up with a SeaWorld in Ohio, and it's really weird how, you know, growing up, they don't teach you that, like, hey, we captured these guys. They don't have the ability to

28:39 fuck they swim up to them they jack themins probably never starve to death. I mean, they're faster than fish. Yeah, that's dolphin world. dolphins won't have sex until their baby has reached like maturity until their baby can swim Yeah. You know, like, Like, um... and I'm like as an assault on me the big guy The cops were called, and we just, I think, maybe ran off the stage and just dipped and got away.

31:50 and then we ran from cops and got away. So all you have to do is be born in a country like that and you get a passport. Right. you they said there's a you have an outstanding warrant which i think is pretty funny it's like And I got it sorted out from, you know, like, whatever. toughest country to get into. that big of a deal. He's got 50 grand, man.

34:33 And so he gets pulled over by the cops, and he tells the cops, officer, I work for a check Still on his record somehow? He worked for a check cashing company. college or something like that, and got arrested. even harder to get into than Canada. but nothing was really how many times you've been arrested uh there's one in uh in philadelphia like my criminal past or whatever.

37:10 it's Steve-O Guilty As Charged. comedy special for showtime and it's of course called steve-o guilty as charged where are you It's like a one-man show where, like, it's totally stand-up. and you just fucking keep smashing it in your head You look so healthy for someone who's done so much fucked up shit to your body. carlos mencia and your crowd work well yeah because like all i pulled out like i'm one of my like big bits is you know

39:58 Okay, now I want you to clap really loud if you went on to have sex with that guy. just like her cat bringing her a dead mouse. every time, Did you hear what Greg Fitzsimmons is doing? theater in austin like i don't have the luxury of waiting to get there to fucking sell tickets because Thank you. you better i used to do it like i used to do it like on comedy clubs like six times a week

42:49 Oh, I see. I was doing it like all the time so you're doing it like wednesday thursday right right right right exactly so by the time sunday rolled around you had brain damage Like, how did I get into it? How did the jackass shit start? Well, uh, they relocated me into another So I failed out. it's like, well, what are you going to do now? I was really fucking good at drinking bong water.

46:01 gonna be a diver but if i jump strictly off of like roofs of like I just fucking stopped. arm on fire, like just the rubbing alcohol a fireball like off of my arm like which is a huge lamp lamp oil goes crazy so like the lamp oil and just, Right, No, where I've like no don't tell them well I mean Well, then fucking I better figure it out. That's just

49:32 Like a bunch of people Fire marshal know No, one time I burned my neck really bad, Right. It's going to go on and there's just going to be, I wasn't sober yet when I first started. Now, is being sober, does that fuck with your ability But you embrace that. Right. And there was, like, a keg party. i get punched and i'm like pretending i get punched and i just throw myself off the balcony

53:21 I broke my cheekbone. even fucking twitching a finger at all i mean just like there's just blood pooling you know and and It was unbelievable. a beer but i couldn't because it hurt too bad and i couldn't eat or anything and I was like my sinuses would like a bowl of applesauce sat next to my And my mom, like, sort of felt bad for me because I broke seven teeth. And so my fucking, all my front teeth are all busted out and she knew I was a fuck up, you know, which teeth, like, uh, it was, it was, uh, like my,

56:26 my first drunk driving, you know? And like, and so they fucking take me into a Miami Dade You know? this sucks, And she's like, what? i'm like fuck that you know so i I know. And it was just like more like oh no way steve-o cool man have a good night and so like they would so they would take off you wall so hard that i fucking actually pounded a hole through the wall where i'm looking into his

1:00:52 well, the thing was for whatever, for vandalism. I'm shirtless. And, the perfect opportunity for me they re they re-arrest me at the jail oh my god so i'm in so so i'm in there for like three days chick, it was such a fucking When you're renting four apartments and then you still get evicted like that's when you I don't know. He's probably shady. I tried.

1:04:52 It's basically a thing about life. Oh, actually, there was that, yeah. I don't know. Now, how did you get started on ketamine because ketamine is yeah. It's basically a pharmaceutical PCP. you know, the K-hole experience? Like I've been, with just way too much of the shit. that it was falling through. so it's initially a vial where you would stick a needle into.

1:08:12 I mean, PCP started out as an anesthetic. I've got it figured out, man. maybe 24 hours and now i'm i've got you know my three days is is like i've got one more day i got which will be like a 25-foot drop onto the sidewalk. Noxel makes fun of me about the sliding glass door Knoxville reached out to Dr. Drew, who was on the list, the email list. psychiatric ward wow so they came over to for my intervention and and like they're like it wasn't

1:11:48 But what happened was they had the emails printed out where I'm saying I'm ready to die. And then I just straight took a nap. and, uh, committed for the involuntary psychiatric hold. So they had me Demons. But nothing like this guy. And I would be, like, trying to suffocate myself to death, you know? That was, like, a... While you're doing ketamine?

1:14:26 I'm worried about your health more than I'm worried about you overdosing. people are like that not people one guy I remember one guy like shit on the about alcoholism and he's like dude you have you really like this book can really help you like Like, there's, like, there's no chance. it's saying is like that the more hopeless the more fucked up you are the better the chances

1:17:34 That's the rock bottom theory. that's Brian. i don't know and then these guys come in and talk about alcoholism and I wouldn't have fucking ever listened you know thinking you know half years just from that moment on from the psych ward on wow and has there been any moments and i i told drew i said i said hey man you know i'm like right out of fresh out of the psych ward

1:19:41 like a halfway house kind of a deal. Well, I was bouncing around treatment for six months. But all day long, we had all of our little groups and structured rehab activities. So how did you pay for all this? It's better than the fucking $300,000 I spent on fucking suing these fucking people I knew It was just a straight resentment fucking investment.

1:21:26 Hell no. I had the spot right after Monday Night Raw, with a hot chick and a fucking 365 pound black like football player driver dude uh, the, For 200 people. email list and that was what killed that was what killed the show despite the fact that it was like Like, they take you out to various kinds of meetings, you know? I'm confused. Yeah, and mostly just sort of keeping you in a safe environment is really what it is.

1:24:29 it was great for me to stay like, like scrubbing the toilet you know like or whatever you know like and i had this curfew what time i on the on the You know what, dude? The structure. It's like the sweet sounds of snoring. You know? Because it's like awkward jacking off with a guy in the room. But if he's snoring, it's like the sweet sounds of snoring.

1:26:23 Dude, that was fine, man. Yeah, I got into a relationship. I mean, i got your first year yeah i got into a It was like an apartment complex that point so it's an apartment. You got your own apartment then yeah, but I hate Park and we would have groups from like, like in a professional sense. like I was, But I'm like, no, i'm a terrible person i did this

1:29:58 And this all came about from just doing an inventory on your past. but not not be angry at yourself not judge yourself well i mean i i don't know like like Like, for me today, it's like I'm fucking desperate to not be that fucking asshole anymore, you know? You know, it was just about I don't want to be that fucking guy anymore and so i came out of that second rehab or that second psych ward

1:32:26 fucking, What are the guys to do nothing. Right. do for a living that they could afford to than if you're gonna try and find an apartment or anything like that and in the sober living Like, I'd be like, oh, hey, guys, I'm not going to be able to call bingo tomorrow because I'm going to be like Well, Like, Like, you know, you help, And so when you have a sponsor,

1:35:52 And just very few of them stick with it where they get. I mean, they've been, like, but then he's drinking again. who are not actually there. a perfect example. Anthony Bourdain. Hey, man, power to him. She was super hot, you know? Right. What? I recently found out the drug is was banned jesus fucking christ It was so that they could appeal to a more health-conscious market.

1:41:14 rate like laying down resting like 150 beats a minute like um and it turned out that i had like you know, And the same guy, And I just had a strong heart. They gave you $2,000? and slept on a roof until we got into the medical study. didn't like after three years i couldn't take anymore and i reached out to my sister and she fucking went ape shit have you written a book uh-huh okay is this all in the book totally dude

1:44:26 give it a fucking five stars. back and forth. You know? Yeah, please. It's a Of course. Yeah, please. Right, of course. Unbelievable cool trick like this one and then like on that point like we'll fucking bring Right. right but then again but does anybody experience dude same way of course we were doing kill tony last night that's one of the things i wanted to tell

1:47:37 If you just did one a week, you now and like everybody who is a user of this platform like uh like it has an account that they And it's like, you just made $1,000. and i hated it and i haven't done it since. Yeah. I did this show and the guy who promoted the show, I didn't know about it, something that Like, hey man, there's a guy who's a DJ who's saying that he's spinning records in between

1:49:50 I get there, this giant mess. Exactly. And I said, dude, you can't do that. But this guy did it on his own. He just let this guy handle everything, who we didn't need in the first place. What is he doing? your idea. Don't let them see it. and everything's great. You're like, oh, no? I want to be picky, you know? And I know that they're going to post it.

1:52:38 Yeah. before I do my last fucking amazing stunt, my book and i've got my fucking like my hats my shirts and if if you guys want to get any of this It's just not going to take a picture of the people who buy merch first. those people like oh just right but how many don't. Don't buy it. How many people are out there selling fucking a one fucking side, one color fucking shirt

1:54:45 He sells shirts for like $500. and 20 bucks. in Austin leave here you're lighting Everybody will be alive. Was it Sweden or something happened? We used to have these fucking giant opening shows. They light the fire. Yeah, I got like BBs stuck in my body, but that's by choice. It's like, you know, like warning signs for esophageal cancer from just like acid reflux

1:57:43 You're a vegetarian now, right? And I haven't smoked weed since March 9th of 2008. I've had- so um oh yeah no so vegan you're vegan yeah dude like don't even there's there's a whole You know, like I don't want to be 51 and falling apart and trying to hump everything that moves. Vince Neil. that's the deal like i like how can i give so much of a fuck about animals that i won't fucking eat

2:00:48 And just like, you know, like, and whatever, if I'm on the road, like fucking hooking up with all the chicks, it's just like, it just became clear. Like that's pretty much like a path to being sucked everywhere. Like I could do it you know Basically gets in a line Well, I'm all, Oh, wait, like I'm stoked on it man my whole story arc you know you love animals that's how i got into it yeah okay but you feed your animals animals i i do feed my my dog's um dog food

2:03:41 animals right i mean i just like that like i don't know i mean i hear that No, it's just the animal thing is weird when people are super self-righteous about killing I don't... What about farm fresh eggs I think if I eat fish and eggs, then all of a sudden I'll have more energy. No, I use a mouthpiece. And I have a thick neck. Yeah, the hole's narrow. Yeah thinks i think that's going to cause a sleep apnea yeah the holes narrow yeah i have that too and also like i they've talked to me about getting an operation

2:06:13 You need sodium in your life. And he had this jug right next to the bed because fighters would drink like gallons of water in a day. piss like I don't have classic Kool-Aid So when you got a sleep study, Well, you should lose weight. Right. Right. about the guy it's like when he said like uh i'm thinking like, man, I'm going to get sued. And I'm awake because I was writing.

2:09:02 Then all of a sudden... I forget what the time was no no no no smoking weed right now on Paris. I go, you hold your breath. I was going to And then you wake up because your body's gasping in panic mode. he travels with that he has to check. I mean, so he always has to check his luggage because his carry-on is his CPAP machine. What do you think about it?

2:11:34 So he does these classic Bill Cosby bits, material anymore so I don't know I don't think it's really effective it seems for being funny and it's distracting thinks the guy's disgusting it's a gimmick. I mean, I see what he's like. He genuinely thinks the guy's disgusting. So maybe he'll explain it better. sweater but none of these girls like the next the next morning, well, God, what the fuck happened? He raped me.

2:14:18 It doesn't seem weird to me. drug them like would you like a cappuccino would you like a little cappuccino and give him a And then you're confused because you wake up and you were drugged But you've got to realize some women did. teams of lawyers that just try to figure out any sort of attack that they could do to try to Right. You can't threaten them.

2:17:58 I mean when you when you're worth what that guy's made in his career the difference between Bill Cosby before it ever gets started. It's dark shit, man. got caught he would say like horrible shit to them like pray for me and stuff like while he's That seems fucked. I don't think that's the case. I don't know. Don't you ever ruin that. Right, right.

2:21:30 Did you hear about Anonymous releasing all the KKK members' information? Almost everything they do, I agree with. race! Somebody wanted to fuck with you. jumping off roofs and shit and damaging your body You know, I missed the crazy train. but um everybody's getting old and Oh, yeah. I think it did well. I love the kid in there. Close to your chest?

2:24:55 It's early the fuck on. Yeah, joints are all good. Right, right. That wasn't a bull. It was a and the bull lost him to the air? Right, right. bottom and like i remember like hearing that like you know he turns his like turning the car like Because you can do flips and all that shit, I don't know. And when you, you know, you hit the front brake, if it locks, you go flying over the top.

2:27:55 because i go well i got through this luckily without getting hurt but if i had to do this You know, I mean, you got to when you watch those crazy action movies, think about that. Theater. Paramount Theater Theater November 21st on November 21st on the 20th the Comedy Store, secret guests. Thanksgiving week alright you fucks thanks Joe yeah