Joe Rogan Experience #930002 — Eddie Bravo Transcript

Transcript

0:00 other fighters still working on my music you know there's still there's a lot of stress but it's all They're adding new servers. I think it's kind of cool. entertaining like it was pretty legit this time that last time around thank you very much it the They don't want to hear anything. like every month and a half, two months or anything? I just moved to Sherman Oaks.

2:31 That's badass, dude. He was, you know who he is. Yes. You know, it's got some great fucking stories. He's huge that was the biggest mma movie to date but it was terrible they made it into like the fast and the Any of those kind of movies, What it is is I'm going to make an MMA movie. How are they going to get their movie? The first one's really bad.

5:25 Same story though. I'll never forget. matter yeah yeah it doesn't matter he was really arrogant about it i'm like i'm telling you as a Yeah, totally. This is silliness. but like in Never Back Down they're like oh he had him between his, most people didn't even know that was a technique. They're like, all I think about is that fight. Rona's trying to get Rampage in a triangle.

8:50 a vegetable, like damn, at least you kept him unbelievably violent knockout. Hojirio Noguera, and then Do you remember that guy? That was apparently early, early on. say well you know there's certain amount of losses a fighter has and then they're done but every now He got submitted by Verdum. He'll kill you with a guillotine. Anybody try to take him down, you got to take him down.

11:59 He's fucking submitted Vitor with it. Valentine Overeem's Jiu Jitsu is really didn't he? I've, Of course you need like the mental state together. Fall in love with it, I don't need to shoot the ball. in Jiu-Jitsu, If you fall in love You're one of those motherfuckers. even if you're a Brazilian jiu-jitsu black belt You got to win more than two fights and you better be exciting.

15:02 Good luck making it to the ocean. No one ever sees it. I want them to, you know, their submissions look slick, Nogi. They couldn't get passed by. guess what? I could be famous too. I wrestled 23 years. Fuck this life. They got three kids. They hate their You're going to start wrestling now. your chances are slim that you're going to get past the elite wrestler

17:24 Oh, my God, what a fight. Edwin Figueroa, Michael McDonald kid that fought this weekend. Did you see that fight? I didn't see that fight. Oh my god, This fucking kid is super talented, ass kicked in the first round, but then And he's fucking 20 years old, man. That's the next stage. They're good off their back. They're all good off their back. You have to be, that's the next stage.

18:37 That's if you have that, You have to have all of them in place. and we see these guys come and go it really is a strange perspective for me i'm getting to see not an athlete i'm not this tough dude i just i just notice things that's all i notice things On that level, there's a lot of guys who can get away with just wrestling and really good striking.

20:37 But I think the main concern is, you know what? If you're not into it and your career's not going that great, ask yourself that question. and you're going to want to take You're going to get more damage But for some guys, they don't have that option in their toolbox. that simple if you want to lengthen your career you want to be as effective as possible and if

22:38 it's not like he hasn't been working on getting right back up to his feet be put on his back? Yes. Leg kicks. takedowns in that fight, If he gets a hold of him, It's all about how they're going to match up. He took his time, but he sort of went But now, who knows? Jake Shields is able to get, like, one St. Pierre. Not even once. That's another scenario. Sure. That, I mean, if that happened,

25:32 he did more in college college wrestler ever Very possible. But you know what Phil Davis kept doing? fuck it, I'm going to stand with him and take my chances there. You see how fast he flicks up those head kicks, dude? Yeah. What's the other one? heavily muscled, like really like super athlete builds. superhero. Isn't it weird that it's kind of Well, you know what I think?

27:59 No. You have no idea how much work I put in. You know, there's certain certain things that you know, isn't that weird? different in a racist way than the idea that you know african americans were at one point in time that they have the fucking greatest bodies of all time? When was the last time a white guy was flying through the air in a basketball game like

30:22 But it's because we owned you. so if you follow the movie True Romance, world where all the Mexicans were enslaved a whole different feeling for it. monkey and this more evolved monkey was like, god damn, but I am horny. They're fucking awesome at math. Than Japanese people are Holy shit I wonder if they would troll us them fucking donkeys like it's like in this part of colombia if there's people fucking animals

33:58 For goof? poor and has dirt roads and you don't even realize stuck with no shoes on. like and then sometimes i was so horny i would not even use a condom and now fuck the neighborhood Yeah, it starts leaking. Sheep pussy is so good There was, remember... It's becoming a problem. They're outlawing I think them farmers tried all that shit. They're settling on sheep for some reason.

36:49 whatever that nonsense is. They go, fuck you. smoking joints about dolphins. like you could have a tiger That's good. And it would be slimier. Can you imagine that? him and he can take you for a ride did you know with giving you a gentle dolphin blowjob with Dude, a YouTube video of that? It's illegal? Can the FBI come to your be hosted in another country. It's illegal?

39:32 This made me laugh. Because you could always say, man, your honor, I thought this was hilarious. There's got to be a contest, dude. Before you know it, What do you think about setups? Dude, if there was a $5 million Grand American Idol prize, Oh totally The UFC heavyweight champion You know what I mean? Because if somebody put it out today, there would be a bunch of people that would be into it.

42:30 It all died off. Why not? And you're the emperor? you're having fucking orgies you're having people fight lions in front of you you know what that man. Everybody wants to think that they could be the guy running shit. If you think you're around run shit. He's just a regular person. access to information the more you realize that the guy in charge is just fucking crazy. The less likely it is to be able to have something like that.

45:26 Because they're getting information. When shit is really happening, when real shit is going down, that's the last time I want to listen to Alex. We'll be right back. That was good. But he's out of his mind. histronics, the craziness. He's like, damn, I got a 1 in 6 chance. Why would they kill him, man? That's what it is. that get made. A lot of people go into government with good intentions,

48:08 You remember those? I just pulled that out of my ass. you know, these representatives of foreign countries were coming to that one place. negotiate and eventually all being released i mean he documents red line on it. How fucking telling me I can't go to work. They wouldn't let people into buildings. They had cops there with but if you're going to judge a guy based on, like,

51:05 I need to relax. He could be a guy like, please don't talk about conspiracies like anymore. to Diet Coke but he doesn't you'd be like That's you. He has answers to all my questions. unless that happens, gold's going to be useless it all depends on whether or not by the time back. And when you come back, they talk to I'm never going to have a guy robot.

54:04 Yeah, you know. dog? They'd be like, what the fuck are you He fucking leaps over buildings and lands on shit. and it's all going to happen. Clint Eastwood is the shit, especially in that movie. You know, that's probably also just like dramatic scenes in a movie. him in the end okay dude i know i know we're just having fun here you fucks you wouldn't wouldn't you think

56:49 and your wife what is this fucking robot? You come home You wouldn't even feel bad because it's not a real person. Relax, everybody. they don't know they go you know they don't they don't have any idea they have no idea how many They don't know, man. This dude's going back and forth. He snuck over the border. How about His hips are all fucked up. And people were like, man, you can't be here.

59:47 They didn't have anything. and try to get jobs, Why can't they just come over here? Like, listen, bro, that's chaos. Yeah. There's got to be a map that you can get before you make the trip, and all the strawberry fields You show up to a strawberry field Of the stars Go stare at him while he's sleeping. How easy is it to just make shit up? They'll come out, though.

1:02:22 it's down meanwhile you're selling fake weed. You're ripping people off, man. Dude said that that's how High Times survives, is with that you couldn't produce a quality Amazing. you're allowing What a hypocrite. What a creepy person No, I haven't tried it. I've heard it actually works. Mm-mm. He was awesome, man. Lynn. the same thing as marijuana it just becomes you know they can do that that's what they also did

1:05:57 And you used to be able to buy it online, man. because then people start looking at what makes it illegal and what is legal. And then the argument Sit the fuck down. pretty interesting i didn't enjoy the end spoiler alert is that your ears effects the idea pretty And that's the real argument, the real problem with psychedelic drugs being illegal. There's a lack of reality and a lack of openness when it comes to

1:09:31 We have the attitude about drugs about marijuana about psychedelics that an 11 year old has that's how we treat it like Guess it is a Nobel Peace Prize for work in DNA discovery. Yeah, there's a lot of weird stuff about him. like crazy, man. We were talking about that game show in my head episode that I did. and I would talk in their ear with a little earpiece. And I would tell them, here's your stunt. This is what you got to do.

1:12:01 So, you're going to try to ask one of these people to pretend it was them. There was a UFO here earlier, apparently. We were shaking our heads going wow, how full of shit are people? People would just start talking about shit. very successful entrepreneur really bad. It really was cures alcoholism. There's this Ibogaine retreat in Mexico You land in Mexico City

1:14:10 And he went to this place. so it said his receptors as far as addictions. Yes, yes. Do you know? from addiction to pills as possible. that they weren't being honest It's scary shit, man. have a pill problem or you know somebody that has a was that Ed Muskie brought in a Brazilian doctor because he's addicted to ibogaine. And he shows Like, the pressure got to him.

1:17:16 That's what Thompson had said that he was addicted to. and there was no internet. And I was the one who started the rumor. It looks pretty badass. If you go to see that movie and you're not stoned, you should go to jail. You know what, man? I like the glasses. I saw Battle LA that landed in LA But Gears of War would have a way better plot. It's Fast and Furious.

1:19:31 jujitsu and fighting and Mixedmartialarts.com. It was one, holy fuck. Is this bad? But then I go online and. And as I'm watching, I'm like, holy fuck is this bad. You got to remember about age groups. Battle LA? Oh, exactly. your music and about my comedy you know the guys who are negative man they're not always right remake oh you've seen that preview of that it's just like the exact one why would you remake that

1:22:09 Like they're over this guy's house Like dude you gotta watch this. who's still alive today? BattleX had me for like 35 minutes. like to make it realistic. nuke it to go with you about this Gladiator. Recently? have you ever had five girls at the same time? He lost his jaw to cancer. Valley of the dolls. Yeah, he said it Galifianakis. No, that's his look, man.

1:25:22 we're going to need you He's one of the funniest guys I know. I think that's only If he's doing that Because that's pretty crazy I never watch sitcoms. It helps me. Obama doesn't like you either, okay? you got too hot no i i i just don't even that's like seems like a bunch of serious stuff to watch Craziness. Yeah. when eric roberts came to him he's a celebrity he needs a celebrity man not very many celebrities

1:28:54 When really, he has no problem. He could have found some other shit to escape from his life. first day when i analyzed him he said doc i i smoke from a vaporizer they show him it's healthier I retweeted something. I've been friends with him for years. And I go, whoa, dude, this is just a joke. Some guys you can't joke around like that. do this show? Oh shit, on Twitter. Yeah, I Twittered it.

1:31:03 No, no, no. He wasn't kidding. He got a little upset. This is the only discussion that he and I have ever disagreed on. Everyone that he's dealing with is fucked up. Okay, so what do you think it is? But does he know the truth about it? When people say marijuana is not addictive, everything you fucking do can be addictive if your mind is broken. They can't help it, man.

1:33:20 He's pretty rigid on his stance when it comes to psychedelic drugs. I thought it was that and like he did know the truth listening to you from Loveline from back when I, in 1989, back in the day, I love Dr. Drew. I love 90% of what It's unfortunate. they're hitting puberty, it sets them, it sets their brain straight somehowics because ayahuasca at that age right when they're hitting puberty it sets them it sets their brain straight somehow and ayahuasca if you know what it is it's

1:35:51 and this is, there's hundreds of thousands of different plants in the Amazon. They figured And, you know, it's a huge part of their culture, It's a really amazing discovery, because they didn't figure out anything else. Yeah, they don't have supermarkets, but guess what? They're not lost in the jungle. I smoked DMT. unhinge and uh you know give you the full effect in 10-15 minutes as opposed to the ayahuasca trip

1:39:09 So we see Christmas specials and we see Easter. Oh no, it's a religion. I wasn't atheist. At 21, I just moved to Hollywood to be a rock star, walked up to me, looked me in the face and said, He had to do it again for the confirmation Remember that conversation we had We had a conversation with a friend of ours it's the probabilities yeah if you let's look at probability probability theater probability theory

1:41:11 mate it's probabilities you can't just guess about is how the hell did he do that i was amazing so i came to a conclusion it's got to be one of It's something telling him. nobody loves the planet more than that dude you I was listening to a McKenna podcast. There'd be nothing left. incident didn't make me become a tree hugger but it did make me um it did put me on a quest

1:44:45 I'd be like come on bitch what life really is and, you know, the government that we don't just die and we're just done. The most famous in the West was Edgar Cayce. but when he went under in his because they didn't even know back then we're finding the shit he's saying we're finding out the shit now right he was right he did There's a lot of people that could do it.

1:48:16 get a little weird. I start thinking about myself or about my life or about anything else and then of my control, all my control, my thinking. And if I can, if I can, it's, it's literally like a This is what I think, man. imagination allows you to think of these ideas, and then they manifest themselves in a real form. And if you look at the ancient Indians,

1:50:45 these answers that came from somewhere else. So if there is this infinite river of knowledge, Everything happens at the same time. So we perceive it as time. that's the conclusion I'm coming to. But you can call it not like the bearded man or Allah. This is it. Maybe. if we really are the only one that That would be a trip, man. and we've gotten to this point, then just because it,

1:54:48 there's definitely, in my eyes, where we could just grab it like a supercomputer. but that the whole thing is moving in a direction. thing we all are that thing water molecules in the ocean that's that's one of the conclusions of the twister because this is how we became good friends. Um, I was getting a private lessons when And I liked that. And Eddie was the first person to tell me. And Eddie came to one of the private

1:57:32 And you're like, I'll teach you all this shit. and just sit and watch tv that's not what I wanted man I wanted to make sure we're like our friend dude, please just let us get you high. I'm like, I don't want to slow down now. Isn't that an annoying goddamn stereotype that potheads are lazy? man. There's a lot of goddamn time. I'm not lazy at all. I squeeze it all out every day. So when people say that potheads, you know,

1:59:35 the universe all right that's what i was doing while you were sleeping so don't give me a hard You don't have to fucking get up early. know do stand-up at the comedy store and i'm like that's that dude who trains at jean-jacques before we became friends. And I'm like, Oh, that's right. so you couldn't see me from a distance. But then when I saw you at the comedy store.

2:01:29 Because to me, all of a sudden, my mind figured out how to write comedy. So I understood the basic formula. you fucking were awesome and then we then that's when he invited me to give him a private or The one thing, the one part about the story. That's cryptic shit for you bitches. every day, high Death Squad the 300,000 mark, bitches. be anything like the first one. So Never Back Down 2,

2:04:08 I mean, this is legit. Cool. Get in there. Thank you everybody for It's all podcast people now. These crowds Joey Diaz will be on the podcast Wednesday. I'm sorry. I did one more.